For me Its quite simple. My brain decided it. Literally. The days I found out I’m trans, my brain would do this weird thing, where I could think about completely different stuff and suddenly my now chosen name would “fly” into my mental Field of View, like an asteroid in star wars or so. I told that name a close friend and 4 weeks later when we went to the club together I told him, that I will stick with it, because I didnt had a better idea (and it was the only name I really felt comfortable with).
It was my FFXIV character’s name first.
It’s sort of the femme version of my given name. There’s a lot of history in my family with that name that I do appreciate and value and want to feel connected to. I did a bunch of research into the names and language of where my family originated and found my new name and instantly fell in love with it. I remember sobbing after writing it down for the first time.
My partners have been calling me “Cat” for years 'cuz my fursona is feline. If I wanted to go through the hassle of changing my government name that’s the one I’d pick, but I’d spell it with a ‘k’.
I started making a big list with checkboxes on it. I added things like nicknames and “boymode” nicknames where they applied. Then I went down the list and checked off the ones I didn’t really like that much. Then I started saying them out loud one night, and my spouse would just say “no” to them and those were checked off the list. I have two left, now. I’m still open to suggestions from others, and I am asking people when I come out if they have suggestions. The hard part is that both of the names I like are either my spouse’s initials or my mother’s, and I can’t stand my mother. One day I’ll make the choice final, but I’m trying one of them out now. The clinic and hospital network I use has a field in my profile for “preferred name” and they actually use it, so it’s in there for now.
I made a list of (mostly bad) names and made a poll with my friends to see which one didn’t suck
Baby Name gen
It came to me in English class when I was 17. At the time I was unsure of why I became attached to the name. A few years later I realised why (and that it was a cliche, but I was attached at that point). I let my parents pick my middle name so they could have some say in naming me.
That honestly took me over 6 months. I tried a number of names on for size, but none felt quite right. The ones that felt right were in use by close family or friends. The one I really wanted is used by both my ex-wifes, so that would’ve been weird for the kids even if they’re not kids anymore.
It was much easier picking out names for the kids actually. Otherwise I followed the advice I got to take a name that is sorta common in my age group so I went through all the lists multiple times until I decided. I now officially have a girl’s name, even if I’m nowhere near passing. It isn’t as bad in my country as in many others and I must say it went a lot better than I expected, but I’m still proud of myself. 😊
read a cute reddit story where person asked mom to rename after transition.
I kept my name. It’s unisex, and a search of it on LinkedIn actually shows like a 70-30 split of female to male respectively. I’m comfortable with it and used to it and, living in the US rn, I don’t want to deal with all the name change issues.
Ayy, samesies. I love my name, and like you said, it’s a very common female name. There’s also a certain sense of power that comes from being un-deadnameable.
My government name is 99% masc, but I only hear it at work and it isn’t worth the hassle of changing it. All my mates and friends just call me “Cat”.
I wish I could come up with another name. For some reason, it just feels weird and almost wrong to name myself. That isn’t judgement against people who have chosen their own names, it’s my own awful hangups and I wish I had the confidence to pick something for myself and own it. So I guess I need a group of friends that know me and can help me pick one.
My real name is gendered af. And even before this awakening, I disliked it because everywhere I go, there’ll always be other people with the same name as me. It’s like my parents’ generation just had no fucking imagination or originality. And it’s people being named basic shit that leads to all of the Tragedeighs in the next generation as over compensation.
I just haven’t found a name I’d like to use, but my irl name is at least 98% male. Part of the problem is my name was chosen to be really similar to my non-birth-mom’s name and I like that. At least there are some spellings that are used by females, even if those are uncommon, but the pronunciation doesn’t change at all and I’ve used such as a in-game name before egg cracked. My name is relatively common from my generation. Not super-common, but also I was in a classroom once with like 5 students and three of us shared the name. Been over three years tho and still not even an inkling of an idea for alternatives.
I know this struggle! I feel odd naming myself, but those close to me also refuse to offer a suggestion. They all say “that’s too personal a thing for me to choose in your place” or “I’m already bad at naming things so, no”. I suppose that I will have to hear it for the rest of my life, so I might as well like it!
I saw someone else here mention that they came up with a short list of names, then got friends to rate them or vote on them and narrow it down from there. Might be an idea. Thinking about it, you can’t really blame people for not wanting to make that decision for someone else. Although it would make it easier lol.
I just kept asking people if I may have their names and they kept giving them to me
Username checks out
Checks out
It’s a name that I saw online a handful of times and always thought was incredibly cool. Then came across it again recently trying to pick a name, while I was looking through related names, and it immediately became a top candidate. And it also works well in both German and English which is also something I wanted.
For a while when I was a kid I wondered what my name would be if I chose it myself and that was the only one that felt like it fit. Totally forgot about it until after my egg shattered and realized that it’s gender-neutral and I really like the cutesy nickname/diminutive forms
I new my name 7 years before I new I was trans, I already ordered stuff on that name and my whole online persona was built around it. I even named my cat that. Even before I was out to myself I listened to that name way better than my dead name.
