Super sick most of the week, and the US healthcare system is awful. “We don’t test for flu because the CDC said the season is over; here’s a list of homeopathic remedies to try” is the last thing you want to hear from urgent care.

I did manage to ride my bike in a charity ride this weekend! My first metric century was a lot of fun. I hope to do more!

My uh, friend, would like to see the “Steal this look” infographic. Please. Please!

You aren’t alone!

Your choice is completely valid and yours to make. I just don’t want people to think it’s either/or in the full and opposite direction. There are options for things like zero-depth or even nullification that don’t require dilation or very much recovery time.

Some girls just have a penis I guess

And some have a vulva without anything under it, or nothing at all!

Not that I know what exactly I want to be and express it. But I can explore things now together with my partner and friend. But I’m also really scared and feel guilty for taking up space. Some times I just want to go back, but sometimes I’m also happy it’s out.

I’m happy to hear about more people being comfortable being themselves. You NEVER, EVER have to apologize for “taking up space”. You have the right to exist as yourself, whoever that may be. Your space belongs to YOU. Exist in it! Thrive in it! Explore it!

I have gone through the exact same experience with my own family (devout Methodist on one side, and Portuguese Catholic on the other), and at my brother’s bachelor party. I knew a long time ago that I was trans, and I was his “best man” at this wedding almost 8 years ago. It was very much an unpleasant experience to me. Everyone else thought it was totally normal to them. It is absolutely self-reinforcing to live that experience, and I’m glad we drew the same conclusions from it. It validates my own views of life. Hang in there, sister. Life gets so much better from here.

Yay laser! It works wonders! Just don’t expect them to be immediately visible. And please wear sunscreen and stay out of the sun!

I am sorry things aren’t going well for your recovery. Hang in there!

I’ll summarize by saying it was transmisogyny from a cis lesbian that I have known a very long time. I have no intention of dragging anyone out in public. I will get over it, and spend some time trying to teach her, if I can.

I am looking forward to working with and being part of a community. This one is strong and has good roots! I went to her to learn about the perils of name and gender marker changes but had a very long discussion about all kinds of life experiences.

Trans sister here. This is awful. I absolutely stand behind my trans brothers and things like this bring us ALL down.

P.S. I didn’t find anything in the community details. If you’d rather not have me in here (the line about needing a transmasc community of your own is not lost on me) I’ll delete my replies and be on my way, no hard feelings.

(Almost) Everyone has one, and anyone can definitely be one.

I found my local community! Even better I found a trans elder (I use this term in an endearing, “came before me and knows what she’s doing” manner) who is fighting for our social justice. She’s quite a stand-up person! After a few more online meetings, I’m looking forward to an in-person group meetup and joining in the fight.

On the flip-side, I had a very unpleasant encounter with a “friend” saying some very transmisogynist things to me this weekend like she was just stating facts. Not everyone is an ally, even within the LGBTQ+ community.

Yeah Wednesday sisters!

Girl, get some tights. My quadzilla gravel cyclist legs look like thick thighs saving lives in a pair of yoga pants. Get the ones with the v cross at the abdomen and look like a lower body goddess. Top it off with a nice longline sports bra or a crop top and throw a camp wrap or something over your shoulders. Own that body you built and make it look good for you!

A bittersweet struggle this week. I am mentally where I need to be. Voice training was fantastic, and I started laser hair removal. I have a few outfits together! My body, however, is so far behind the rest of me that it causes frustration waiting for it to catch up. I also can’t start consultations for surgery until the 6 month mark because of insurance requirements. Such an archaic principle for someone who has had an absurdly long time to consider the consequence and determined it’s worth it. Especially since the therapist agrees with my conclusions! Now it’s just a waiting game while I try to figure out who to trust in person with my real identity.

I don’t know if I have a problem seeing myself. My problem is that who I see is ever so slightly different over time. I also know that the self-image I have is incongruent with many things. Gender. Age. Some basic physical features, like hair and eye color. It’s not just the visual, either. There’s a gap between how I carry myself today vs. how I feel I should be physically moving. How I sound is wrong. My scent isn’t correct, either. So while I don’t need to force myself to mentally conjure my self-image, it’s a struggle to keep it nailed down to a single me sometimes.

Negative; I am the willow tree you sit beneath for shade and comfort. I have always been here, and I will always be here. This is an enchanted forest, after all. What is a forest without it’s trees?

I’m taking this same journey right now as well. I was in a similar situation as you (mostly plain shirts and hiking pants, think “Eddie Bauer”). I also really want to branch out to more interesting styles. The one thing I’ve learned from my partner is that layering is pretty much essential unless it’s a scorching hot day. You can also seriously consider the same sources for your current clothing (Eddie Bauer’s Women’s section is not half bad for comfortable things that fit well, if a bit boring). You should consider that bottoms are possibly going to be tighter in some areas and looser in others unless or until hormones or surgery happen. I have a wide and sturdy ribcage, so tops all feel like they’re too tight, especially at the armpits. Sizing up is an option, but so are looser cuts and stretchy materials. I find that I like a tighter base top and something loose to go over it like a hoodie, wrap, or shrug.

Experimentation is the only way to really learn anything. You can always try to abuse the Amazon “try 5 things out” nonsense, or find a shop that’s trans-affirming or go to the next city over if you’re shy and just try on everything until you find what you like. I have known people, especially my mother, to spend an entire day trying on clothing and buy one or two items. Or a dozen! I actually find the shopping and discovery part of this to be fun and a little relaxing. Think of it less as a chore or a scary task and more like a way to explore yourself and your identity, then make a fun day out of it!

I hear this a lot, but what qualifies as a “thrift” store in this case? Are we suggesting places like a Goodwill, or something else? I live in a pretty rural area, but I can get to a moderate city occasionally. My area is pretty much only Goodwill or WalMart/Target. What is everyone seeing in their minds when they hear “thrift store”?

Now why did you have to go and post this? I guess I need to figure out what “submissive” and “rope bunny” mean now.