Hello!
I’m Arkhive (they/she), one of your new mods and I’ve just got a sort of update from the mod team.
We, the mods of Onehundredninetysix (hereby referred to as OneNineSix for my own sanity), would like to introduce ourselves. The members of the mod team that are interested will post a comment below this post and hopefully mingle a bit. Something that has come up in our discussions is a general interest in owning our actions, even in online spaces. That means putting people behind the names you see in the sidebar.
As the OneNineSix community coalesces, things have been quite good from our end. While we could be quicker at processing reports, a lot of that stems from us discussing choices as a group before making final decisions…and probably a bit more fear to use our power than is good for us, but time I’m sure will fix that proceeds to power trip. We are absolutely not infallible, and we also strive to admit wrong when necessary and work to rectify it. There is a degree of patience that necessarily extends both directions between mods and users, and in the end we are all users of the same space. We will work to be good stewards of this space for all those being good stewards with us.
And so! This thread. If this idea goes over poorly, please take it out in the replies to my comment, and we will assess and hopefully the other mods will dive in on the discussion too. We have also floated the idea of an irregularly occurring, semi-regular, mod chat thread. My pitch is for “Modly Mondays” but its still an idea in its infancy and feedback is welcome;)
Thank you for your time, thank you for the memes (the cat included), and I’ll remove see you from in the comments.
TL;DR I’m Arkhive (they/she), I’m a mod, there’s more of us (surprise!), and we’d like to introduce ourselves in the comments.
Side note: I realize this is being posted on a day there are protests happening across the US and presumably throughout the world. While this is not an explicitly US comm, I want to remind people to stay safe. Know your rights, know the ACLU phone number, have an exit plan, go as a group, and don’t talk to cops. We keep us safe.
Fine to ask! I personally conceptualize it like squares and rectangles? Like first and foremost I consider myself trans. My desired gender expression does not align with my gender assigned at birth. However, it is also not exactly opposite the gender I was assigned. So I’m on HRT, I’m considering various surgeries and such, but I still land, present, in a way that does not fit the gender binary. Hope that helps. This is also something I’m still perfecting my language and explanation around, so feel free to chime in with your own thoughts. Like I know some people consider non-binary an umbrella term that trans exists within. Not sure I quite think of it like that, but yeah. It’s an interesting discussion I’m happy to hear thoughts on.
Since it’s ok to ask (I hope), and I guess this is more of a general question rather than personal, but does the order of listed pronouns matter? Is it, like, in order of preference? Mostly I see the second pronoun to just be the objective case form of the first, but yours isn’t. Why do people even list the objective case when it matches the subjective case?
Yes! Good question! If I wanted to be thorough I would write they/them and/or she/her (and/or looking like a set of pronouns has me chuckling). And for me that roughly corresponds to order of preference. Though it’s somewhat situational. Like at work I mostly just stick to they/them. I work with kids, and I worry about bigot parents seeing someone that presents the way I do (mostly gender neutral/androgynous at work) using she/her. In other settings, with my partners, chosen family, and general queer community I’m comfortable with she/her, prefer it even. Stuff like that. Basically using she/her for me is invite only, and y’all are invited.
As far as I’m aware, it’s the opposite, I think this image illustrates it very well:
Yup! Had my visualization exactly backwards! This is what I was trying to describe. Thanks for finding it!
No worries, I had a feeling that was the image you were thinking about 😂
Thank you for taking your time to explain. I get nervous when asking such things.