Based off of the try-hard linkedin douches I know I’d say:
- The Art of War
- Meditations by Marcus Aurelius
- The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
- Rich-dad poor-dad
- The Art of the Deal
If this is the approach, Infinite Jest and War and Peace are solid options. Maybe Oversized Penises for Dummies.
Fuck great call. I thought having two “war” novels might make the joke worse but Infinite Jest is peak big brain public masturbation reading material
Lol, I literally got called out for reading Infinite Jest on a bus. Wasn’t a flex, the bus was just my primary reading time on weekdays and it was on my ‘to finish’ list.
Agreed that I probably looked like a jackass.
Habits of Highly Successful People
Art.
And once you’ve finished:
Rev. Owen Thomas
He should know. He already read a different book about a guy who was hung like this:
South. Eastern. Public. Transport authority.
If you mean reading performatively ALOUD on public transportation, there’s only one choice: The Bible, King James Version.
While I agree I prefer the Ving Rhames version
just realized I was actually in possession of the LeAnn Rimes version, unbeknownst to me
Just to be clear, I meant the Bible X Lebron James edition.
For sure!
saw they caught Bronny with the King Von edition on ESPN in a wild turn of events
Is there another King James with mentioning?
BlueeeeeeeeeeEEeEeeEEeEeEeee
Oh so lonesome for you
Why can’t you be blue over me?
Do they have The Meats™?
Read In A Condescending Voice By a 14 Year Old Atheist.
But make sure you shake your head the whole time so people know you disagree with irrational numbers.
Why Civil Resistance Works by Eric Chenoweth & Maria Stephan
Is the answer the implied threat of uncivil resistance?
I won’t accept this anti pigeon rhetoric.
Oh god do people think you’re being performative when you read in public transport?
Only people who don’t read.
House of Leaves. That way if anyone notices you’re holding it upside down they’ll just think you’re really into it. And if anyone asks you what it’s about you can say “I have no fucking clue what’s happening, there’s a house I think?” and you’ll be correct.
How about an oversized Dr Seuss book?
Props if it is:
- I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew
- Yertle the Turtle
- The Sneetches
Lolita while furrowing your brow and shaking your head so everyone knows you disagree with the protagonist’s actions.
If you’re on a bus, read the novelization of Speed.
What’s it called?
Speed.
/j
I don’t actually know the name.
I think I heard somewhere it was called “the bus that couldn’t slow down”
Did any of Chuck Tingle’s books get physical releases?
Print them out on computer paper and staple your own!
Yes. I’ve seen this at a queer bookstore.
Moby Dick. It is free, unnecessarily long, really wordy, and mostly boring.
Just a man who hates a fish.
I think way too much about how Ishmael complained that the harpooner didn’t also spear the whale and only hooked it and always also expected to row the hardest. Like, hell yeah, you’ve convinced me, Herman Melville!
Rockwell Kent’s illustrations are also amazing.
Wait a minute.
You can’t evolve out of a clade.
Mammals are ultimately descended from fish…
My fucking God, whales are fish.
