Do people seriously conciously fantasize about taking part in erotic acts with real people (especially ones they have feelings for)? It seems extremely disrespectful to me. (if the involved parties are in a relationship it’s probably OK)
Just thinking about how kinky it is that they’re subservient to us. We tell them “no, you slutty little time zone, it’s cold now, so we’re gonna move the small hand back, and if you’re good, we’ll let you come an hour earlier in six months”
What happens in other people’s heads is not my business. Even if the imagined protagonist looks and acts like me, they’re not and I don’t have a single stake in it.
Do people seriously conciously fantasize about taking part in erotic acts with real people (especially ones they have feelings for)?
Yes.
I kinda get the disrespect perspective, maybe. I felt that a little as a teen. But then I thought it probably wasn’t respectful treating my crush in my mind like a sort of sexless statue or object rather than a real human being that I was in love with and wanted to have sex with.
Maybe I seperate love and sex a bit too much (or just more than average)? When I have romantic feelings it doesn’t make me want to sleep with the person they’re directed towards. But I also would likely not decline an invitation to engage in such acts (and given enough time might eventually ask on my own) but until some sort of mutual attraction has been verified I just avoid thinking of them in a sexual way.
When I have romantic feelings it doesn’t make me want to sleep with the person they’re directed towards.
It doesn’t make me want to necessarily sleep with them either, but rather stay up late having sex with them. And maybe after sleep.
But this idea of asexual romantic attraction makes about as much sense to me as saying “When I am hungry it doesn’t make me want to eat food.”
When I say I have “romantic feelings” for someone, the feeling I’m referring to is a combination of love and sexual desire. Even when I was a kid and would sort of push down or repress sexual thoughts because in my head it felt wrong or inappropriate, what I was feeling was sexual desire and love.
My understanding of the term “romantic” has always been euphemistic, based in an understanding that it would be weird and rude to just tell someone you’re crushing on that you love them and you want them to love you too and you want to put your mouth on their genitals because you think you could make them feel really good and you want to physically intimate to be vulnerable with them because vulnerability is a part of of not just physical but emotional intimacy and you want them to share their feelings and feel open to you and so on and so on you get the idea.
Do people seriously conciously fantasize about taking part in erotic acts with real people (especially ones they have feelings for)? It seems extremely disrespectful to me. (if the involved parties are in a relationship it’s probably OK)
I only started to fantasize about my wife after we’d got married. We haven’t had sex yet though. Penetrating a real person would be disrespectful.
Ew
I only consciously fantasise about people who don’t exist.
Sometimes they aren’t even people, they could be abstract concepts, like a time format, or a plan.
Sometimes I even fantasise about concepts of a plan.
Seems like a good way of going about it.
What exactly are you fantasizing about time formats?
ISO 8601 fetishists.
Or a real pervert who is into that American date format abomination.
I can’t help that I’m into that freak shit.
Just thinking about how kinky it is that they’re subservient to us. We tell them “no, you slutty little time zone, it’s cold now, so we’re gonna move the small hand back, and if you’re good, we’ll let you come an hour earlier in six months”
I see. Very interesting, very interesting indeed.
What happens in other people’s heads is not my business. Even if the imagined protagonist looks and acts like me, they’re not and I don’t have a single stake in it.
If they didn’t, you probably wouldn’t be here.
But it’s probably ok if the two are in a relationship. So maybe the sexual fantasies of their awful parents were legal.
Yes.
I kinda get the disrespect perspective, maybe. I felt that a little as a teen. But then I thought it probably wasn’t respectful treating my crush in my mind like a sort of sexless statue or object rather than a real human being that I was in love with and wanted to have sex with.
Maybe I seperate love and sex a bit too much (or just more than average)? When I have romantic feelings it doesn’t make me want to sleep with the person they’re directed towards. But I also would likely not decline an invitation to engage in such acts (and given enough time might eventually ask on my own) but until some sort of mutual attraction has been verified I just avoid thinking of them in a sexual way.
It doesn’t make me want to necessarily sleep with them either, but rather stay up late having sex with them. And maybe after sleep.
But this idea of asexual romantic attraction makes about as much sense to me as saying “When I am hungry it doesn’t make me want to eat food.”
When I say I have “romantic feelings” for someone, the feeling I’m referring to is a combination of love and sexual desire. Even when I was a kid and would sort of push down or repress sexual thoughts because in my head it felt wrong or inappropriate, what I was feeling was sexual desire and love.
My understanding of the term “romantic” has always been euphemistic, based in an understanding that it would be weird and rude to just tell someone you’re crushing on that you love them and you want them to love you too and you want to put your mouth on their genitals because you think you could make them feel really good and you want to physically intimate to be vulnerable with them because vulnerability is a part of of not just physical but emotional intimacy and you want them to share their feelings and feel open to you and so on and so on you get the idea.
Sounds like you might be on the asexual spectrum.