But these sheep can’t wear masks? Give me a fucking break.
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To be fair, they need the bandage just as much as trump does.
Like. A day or two after the attempt he was out golfing and didn’t have a bandage or anything.
I think it was just a small nick and the blood thinners he’s likely on just makes you bleed like crazy since they prevent clotting. A small scratch looks like a war wound, and would explain why there was blood everywhere but he still has a functional ear.
Like, if he really got shot in the ear, he’d be missing a part of his ear like in Preacher. It won’t just heal back.
Dude got a scratch and is playing it up.
He’s a WWE Hall of Famer. I would not be surprised if he was blading.
Trump is on blood thinners? Why?
…
He’s in his late 70s, doesn’t exercise, eats like shit, and is drastically overweight…
Like, it’s one of those things that are just safe to assume. Blood thinners arent really that rare for people 30 years younger than either candidate.
I wonder what his theoretical are is lol.
His blood is thick with hamburger juice.
A lot of people that age, with his OBVIOUS unhealthy BMI are on blood thinner as prevention more than anything else.
To prevent strokes and heart attacks. It’s pretty common.
The masks prevent them from quaffing their own farts all day long.
Well…
There isn’t a fourth monkey covering its nose.
There is, however, a fourth monkey covering his crotch. “Do no evil”
LOL what the fuck. i’ve never seen a more subservient bitchass group of bootlicking sheep than republicans
They really are strange.
Apparently, the other people are sheep. These are the free-thinking freedom loving people! /s
Dear God man … this is crazy cringe.
Projection is how Republicans roll. Remember when MAGA accused Joe Biden of wearing diapers and they found out their dear orange felon/rapist cult leader wore them instead, and started wearing them?
LOL WHAT
It’s not as weird as the diapers.
I think it’s pretty close. Both are super fucking weird and pathetic.
Don’t knock diapers till you try em tho
And yet they’re the ones screeching about “alpha males and the loss of masculinity in America.”
which is hilarious, because if you’re whining about someone “taking away your masculinity,” (OR if you’re having panic attacks about someone else’s masculinity) then you were never masculine in the first place.
Fragile masculinity.
Hierarchies gonna hypocritize.
But remember, they hate being called sheep.
Just a reminder, jd vance, trumps newest vp pick, has on many occasions been quoted in the past of saying “I didn’t vote for trump”, “I never liked trump”, and “I’m a never-trump guy”.
NOW he sings trumps praises, and kisses trumps ass.
vance is just another vapid muppet who’ll get thrown under the bus the instant shit goes sideways and trump needs someone to blame for…whatever. just like all the other used-to-be-never-trumpers who are now fighting over who gets to be first to be facialed by trump
His name has an extra syllable, he might be counting on Trumpanzees being unable to make a nice little chant like they did for Pence.
Vance literally called Trump “America’s Hitler” in a now deleted tweet.
Also so many are Christian and say shit like “the lord is my shepard” in the same breath that they call other people “sheep.”
Makes me think of the court at Versailles all pretending to have anal fistulas after Louis XIV had surgery for one.
I’m gonna take your word, I ain’t clicking on anal fistulas.
“I’M NOT THE MESSIAH!”
He’s just a naughty boy!
“I say you are Lord and I should know, I’ve followed a few”
“HE IS THE MESSIAH!”
#NotACult
So say we all.
So they’re fine with cloth on the face as long as it’s completely unnecessary?
Seems everyone should have realized by now what a weak, sad, and pathetic group the Republican party is.
You mean the American Fascist Party?
Not to be confused with the American Nazi Party. But I forget what the difference between the two is these days
Yes, you two are in agreement. You’re saying the same thing.
I can’t decide if this is more or less weird than wearing a diaper in support of Trum…no…it’s less weird…right?
Are we 100% sure they’re not also wearing diapers?
No! And that’s why I decided the diapers were weirder. Those folks had to go out of their way to announce they were wearing diapers.
I mean what even is the point of wearing a diaper in support of Trump if you don’t tell everyone?
Those folks had to go out of their way to announce they were wearing diapers.
I did not look at it from that angle, but you are 100% correct; the diapers are weirder. lol
I’m pretty sure. There would be no end of them telling/showing you.
Since these people aren’t treating any ear injury, you might as well call these “ear diapers.”
That is consistent with their usage of chin diapers that also had no medical use.
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This is like saying “When I say ‘that’s gay’, I don’t mean gay as in homosexual, I mean gay as in stupid”.
I think it’s a bit different when the word has been totally abandoned for the previous use. I don’t know anyone who uses ‘lame’ or ‘dumb’ to refer to people with those disabilities. It’s practically an archaic meaning at this point. Gay is still most popular as a reference to sexuality.
How do you think they got to be archaic?
New words were found for the original meaning that were less pejorative, causing the slang to take over?
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Tom Segura nailed it.
Made me think of this.
if straight women got bleeped when they said “dyke” I’d have a way easier time dating 🫠
just run up to a hot gal with a fake microphone like “TRIVIA POP QUIZ WHAT’S THE WORD FOR ‘an embankment for holding back water’!?”
“[bleep]?”
“correct thank you ma’am have a nice day”“dyke?”
“correct! question 2 are you single and/or dating?”“TRIVIA POP QUIZ WHAT’S THE WORD FOR ‘an embankment for holding back water’!?”
“A levee??”
“… touchè”I’m confused - does the microphone have gaydar screening and auto-bleep capabilities? I would describe that as much more than a fake microphone.
I mean thank you, I remember I got banned from a group like 10 years ago because I said the forbidden F-word, they all knew I was pan and trans, but apparently my N-Word Pass expired?
Can’t say the t-word either, I remember before it was a pejorative it was more like a cute nickname.
original meaning: “waaaah I got trapped into thinking a person of the sex I’m not attracted to is hot and now my genitalia is making me feel weird!”
new & improved meaning: this person dressed not as their assigned-birth-sex is so hot they could literally trap me Looney Tunes style by being distractingly attractive 😩
I thought they meant the slur that’s also slang for a car’s transmission.
oh yeah! that’s way cutesier-sounding than trap now I think about it
Not the T-Word I meant, I think Trap is still an appropiate term for femboys in a purely sexual context. It’s only offensive when used as a term for transgirls… at least that’s what I’ve heard
The word I was thinking of is six letter long
I may be happily ignorant, but what is the “f-word” and “t-word”?
Check slang terms for Transmission and British Cigarette
I work in special education and give you the pass.
We call Republicans hard R’s in our house… it just fits.
Brian Posehn has a great bit about it in his 25x2 special.
We’re supposed to call them republicans now.
Are we allowed to say that?
I’ll give it to you, this is the most a Not The Onion post has made me go “wait, is that The Onion”?
Good job. I think.
I genuinely don’t know how satirists are supposed to make a living any more.
Oh, did you not see the commemorative sneakers he’s selling?
Nah, that I believed. Trump shilling useless crap is extremely plausible.
The people that hate virtue signaling love signaling the dumbest virtues.
They like playing the victim card, then turn away from people who truly are victims.
You think if the shooter hadn’t missed they’d be removing their heads in solidarity?
Correct
I think after the bandage comes off you’re going to see accidental su*cides from people trying to copycat themselves
Maybe we’ll get to find out one of these days.
Cult.
Sheep go baaah
best summary.
Not a cult…
FFS. They really are willing to eat his shit straight from his asshole.
This timeline is so broken. I can’t believe that the USA may well vote this idocracy into power.
America:
