My social media algorithms show me so many cool cosplayers, tomboys, pretty girls in a variety of nice clothes, alt girls, fairies with elf ears but never any attractive men doing anything cool or stylish or interesting that it just feels so lame being a guy.

I never see any attractive men (im bi) with interesting style or clothes or looking attractive in cosplay or being artistic and hot. Are dudes just so boring with their looks or is my algorithm just too skewed towards women?

  • AdaA
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    10 months ago

    So why not do something cool as a guy? I mean, you can even gender bend in your cosplay if you want to! There is no law that says guys can only cosplay as guys!

    • remotelove@lemmy.ca
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      10 months ago

      There have been some really strange things attached to that question before … Still though, it’s amazing how common strange things can be.

    • Jojo@lemm.ee
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      10 months ago

      Well I mean there’s only like 8 billion other people, so certainly no one else has ever felt like me before.

  • klerpi@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    I don’t know how to say this but I feel I need to because people here are being dicks with downvotes: have you ever considered that you’re a gender non conforming person?

    It’s just that feeling you described seems like something you should explore in a more accepting environment.

  • bstix@feddit.dk
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    10 months ago

    The algorithm is pushing that content because you either interact more with it or spend longer time scrolling by. Pictures of beautiful women will always dominate the social media, because everyone regardless of gender and age are biologically conditioned to look at them.

    Don’t be fooled into believing that anything on social media is remotely close to reality. It’s absolutely not a reason for anyone to make life changing decisions. You need to make those decisions based in reality.

    If you’re into cosplay, fashion, modelling or photography, you should try seeing it in real life to acknowledge how incredibly dull it is to make those perfect pictures.

    But also, yes, most dudes are generally less interested in appearing visually hot. It’s mostly bodybuilders who post their beefcakes to impress people on social media. It’s so vain and lacking in confidence in my opinion. I don’t need large muscles to feel manly. To me “manliness” is more about being confident. Not by slacking off and just not caring, but by paying attention to details and understanding how what I wear is fitting me in the situation.

    If you have an actual interest in male fashion, you can easily find that content. There’s no reason why you should feel lame or boring for being a man. There are lots of things you can play with to make a great personal look. For instance I’d start out by ditching the classic safe white or blue shirts and get something with more colours and made from a finer fabric. It will instantly make you stand out from the guys who just wear what their wife brought home.

    • JoBo@feddit.uk
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      10 months ago

      because everyone regardless of gender and age are biologically conditioned to look at them.

      Sorry but this is bullshit. Images of women dominate social media because men with power (and money) tend to like looking at them. I may not be socially conditioned to treat men as objects but the lack of choice this society affords me does not somehow mean I have the same visual preferences as the men who dictate my world.

      • bstix@feddit.dk
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        10 months ago

        No, it’s not (just) because horny old rich men like watching it.

        Images of beautiful women dominate social media because it works in marketing. They wouldn’t do it if it didn’t work.

        It’s not at all about what you prefer watching. Preferably you’d want to avoid watching marketing all together. No, it’s about what makes you buy stuff.

        Most marketing is directed at women (even for men products) because the purchase decisions are mostly done by women in the moment of sales. Using beautiful women in marketing simply sells better.

        • JoBo@feddit.uk
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          10 months ago

          Now you’re mixing up “what marketers think works” with the much broader category of “images on social media”.

          What marketing departments dominated by men think works is not the same thing as what actually works is not the same thing as what gets put on social media.

          • liwott@nerdica.net
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            10 months ago

            What marketing departments dominated by men think works is not the same thing as what actually works

            In this case, isn’t it because the market evolved faster than they could keep up with? Probably there was a time where most of their customers were “macho men”, so these adds would work in marketing.

            • JoBo@feddit.uk
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              10 months ago

              That is the assumption. But that does not mean it is true.

              I posted an example of the tyre company before. The other example I can’t find is the blog by a guy who rented two stalls at either end of the same conference, staffed one with models and the other with local grandmothers. The grandmothers did much more business. It’s the salesmen who want the stall staffed with models, not the customers.

              The evidence-base of sales & marketing is dismal to non-existent.

              • liwott@nerdica.net
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                10 months ago

                It’s the salesmen who want the stall staffed with models, not the customers.

                Could you link the evidence-base of this though?

      • BothsidesistFraud@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Images of women dominate social media because men with power (and money) tend to like looking at them

        Lol you think all the horny 20 something dudes salivating over Instagram hotties have power and money?

        • JoBo@feddit.uk
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          10 months ago

          Clicks are money. The people making the decisions are not the people they’re trying to make money off. HTH

          • BothsidesistFraud@lemmy.world
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            10 months ago

            I’m sorry, you’re confused about this. People with money are not driving the behavior of the hottie enjoyers. It’s the reverse. Joe Everyman is willing to give his attention to hot women, and Instagram is profiting off that.

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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    10 months ago

    I mean, no to the title question because that’s just silly.

    But it’s also a no otherwise.

    I’m not into cosplay for myself. Not my preferred way to spend money. But I’ve seen plenty of in person cosplay done by guys that are superb. It is less geared toward pretty, and more towards “authentic” character depiction, and almost always traditional male super heroes. There are some that bend genders, or pick characters that are less “macho” looking, but finding the relatively small percentage of guys that want to do that, have the skill to do it well, and have the funds to execute it isn’t exactly frequent.

    More often, if a guy steps outside of the standard characters, they do it for the laughs, like this guy I saw doing sailor moon once. It amounted to booger drag, but that was the fun part what with rejecting gender norms in favor of just having a blast.

    But online? Nah, the guys I’ve ever known that are into cosplay seriously don’t post things online because that’s a recipe to get trolled or outright abused.

    Besides, “boring”, “cool”, “stylish” and “interesting” are all in the eyes of the beholder.

    • throwawaygen@lemmy.worldOP
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      10 months ago

      Cosplay isnt the point that was just one small scenario. Idc about authentic cosplay im just talking about wearing stuff that looks good.

  • angstylittlecatboy@reddthat.com
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    10 months ago

    It makes me feel like crossdressing, so I do. Occasionally I see an outfit that needs at least B cups to work (usually something with a boob window) and it makes me feel jealous I don’t have that.

    But I’m with you, I completely disagree with the comment saying men’s fashion is interesting if you look for it. It’s not, the only forms of men’s fashion that are interesting are the forms that society has labeled “feminine.” Going into a store and seeing all the men’s clothes in neutrals and actual variety in the women’s cemented my interest in crossdressing.

  • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    Do you want to be the man looking interestingly attractive instead? Or is this an excuse to want to look like a woman?

  • dumples@kbin.social
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    10 months ago

    I think you are seeing the appeal of drag my friend. Men’s fashion is generally less flashy and more traditional currently than women’s fashion. So those who are interested sometimes get into drag to model and make women’s fashion.

    Also I think most men’s fashion has certain styles and subcultures that you might not be as interested in. Sneaker, caps and street wear is where the money is and most of the innovation. The rest is pretty standardized

  • ivanafterall@kbin.social
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    10 months ago

    I don’t know if it helps, but maybe thrift stores could be a way to try out some of your ideas without spending too much? I recently got some cool t-shirts at one of my favorite thrift shops for $2.99, shoes for $12.99, etc.