For me, it was by maintaining a conscious awareness that it was the consequence of growing up in a transphobic society.

People aren’t born hating trans people, they learn it. And that includes trans people themselves.

Unfortunately, realising that it’s learned doesn’t magically make it go away. You can’t just erase a lifetime of indoctrination by wishing it away, but what it did for me, was it let me reframe it. It let me understand that the things I felt were real, but also learned, and I can learn a different way of thinking about myself if I give myself time.

Awareness, introspection, and kindness.

Awareness: Be aware that it is internalized & not because you’re somehow a bad person. Phobias are internalized due to exposure to other people’s bullshit behaviors, not yours. As long as you’re aware of what it is, and don’t act on it, then you are better than those that gave it to you.

Introspection: Be willing to examine those internalized biases, so you can learn to recognize them. This will help feed into the awareness mentioned above.

Kindness: Most importantly, be kind to yourself. You are not a monster; you are merely someone who was given all this bullshit baggage by assholes in your past without your knowledge or consent. You’re not an asshole; you’re just emotionally injured.