The Brits thought they were clever by comparing Liz Truss to a head of lettuce, we now have Republican Leaders who don’t last as long as a loaf of bread.
He lasted about a hundredth as long as Scaramucci (for our European audience, that’s equivalent to one centiscaramucci).
Planck length Scaramucci I reckon.
The word you’re looking for is “reckon.” “Recon” is an abbreviation for reconnaissance.
Sure, I’ll fix that to make people like you happy.
That person politely corrected you and you acted like they were an asshole.
Wat?
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So the reason I change it is so a ton of idiots don’t show up to say the same thing. Next time I’ll just change it.
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He lasted only about 0.004 Truss’s
This is the only acceptable measurement of time.
I think we need to start comparing to “ice cream cone on a summer day” to make it more sporting
Emmer didn’t last as long as sliced avocado
Forget a loaf of bread, he didn’t even outlast a tray of cashew chicken put out by a shady Chinese buffet one health code violation away from permanent closure!
This is so many restaurants in Springfield, MO. Our weird local cashew chicken is a travesty.
I can already taste the food poisoning and explosive diarrhea!
With apologies to Andy Warhol, “In the future, everyone will be the Republican nominee for House Speaker for 15 minutes.”
Don’t apologize, Andy would laugh.
From the linked article from The Hill:
“I like Tom Emmer a lot as a person, but I couldn’t support him as Speaker of the House. He didn’t object to Joe Biden’s electoral college vote,” said Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.)
Screaming internally
Screaming Externally
Anyone who voted for that fucktard is a moron.
Anyone who votes for any republican at this point is a moron
Which very much summarizes the situation: One part of the party does not want a criminal as a speaker, and another part does not want anyone but a criminal in that position.
[Emmer withdrew his name from the running after a contingent of Republicans made clear they would not back him on the House floor]
They are already ignoring the pledge they signed to back the nominee. This makes it considerably more likely that Dems will be needed.
And there’s no way they’ll help.
When the GOP decides to walk away from the freedom caucus, insurrectionists, and 100x felon Trump, they can ask for help. Until then, the GOP is on its own.
Really? If the government shuts down and (say) Kevin McCarthy begs them?
Then hopefully they’ll say ‘vote for Jeffreys and we’ll get the government going, otherwise you own this’.
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Did you put your name in the Goblet of House Speaker?
…Dumbledore asked calmly.
A couple dozen cry babies can’t have the worst candidate imaginable, so the country gets to be paralyzed. And the nominee who was the best chance we had for getting past the stalemate had to be torpedoed almost immediately because he dared to support certifying the election, and wasn’t “sufficiently loyal” to Trump. Oh, and he doesn’t hate the gays. So despite literally being the guy responsible for trying to drive votes for the party’s agenda and having helped get numerous other Republicans elected, his past history of not always licking their boots means he might as well be a damn dirty Democrat!
Honestly, if I was one of the moderate / establishment / non-insurrectionist / swing district Republicans in the house, I’d get together with a few of the others who have been holding out against the crazies and see if I can get 5 votes for Hakeem Jeffries in the next secret ballot. A nice shot across the bow and a reminder that they don’t have to surrender to the demands of 20 extremists when there are 200 people on the other side of the aisle that might be willing to compromise.
Not that it would change many minds of course. The nutcase caucus will continue to try seize control and demand absolute obedience because they have nothing to lose. This just makes them more popular with their supporters, and shutting down the government is a net gain from their point of view.
It’s possible that a small number of Republicans might negotiate with Democrats, but as we’ve seen, Trump and pals will try to target anyone who dares defy them. Can’t have our leaders putting the good of the country ahead of loyalty to the only faction of the party that they care about. And while some might be willing to commit career suicide, they’ve already purged a quite a few members for having principles, there’s only so many left.
Of course, that same sense of self preservation is one of the things preventing the more moderate Republicans from caving. They know damn well that they need to keep a healthy distance from the more toxic members of the party. So they’ll probably be inclined to continue walking a tightrope for as long as they can.
As such, it’s the great spineless middle of the party that I suspect will have to finally decide to actually do something useful. They all know that they’ll be the ones taking the blame if a government shut down does happen, and the longer it goes on the worse it will be for them. Sooner or later, that starts looking like a bigger problem than whatever retaliation they might get from their own party for the crime of bipartisanship, especially if there are plenty of others joining them and giving each individual representative cover for doing the right thing. And if they cross the MAGA “No” line and install a speaker that by necessity works with both parties to actually get things done, the intransigent members of the party might suddenly find that they are irrelevant and inconsequential.
I’d get together with a few of the others who have been holding out against the crazies and see if I can get 5 votes for Hakeem Jeffries in the next secret ballot.
That’s not quite gonna work the way you think it will. These secret votes are not binding, and are just a way for party leaders to try and gain some consensus.
And while McHenry is almost powerless, the one power he does have is to schedule a Speaker vote in the full House (which is binding). Or, more importantly, hold the House in recess and not hold a vote. If there is any indication that a handful of Republicans might be supporting Jeffries, then there will be no vote in the full House until those people are found out and sufficiently dealt with.
Any Republicans thinking seriously about leaving their party are better off not tipping their hand until a full vote is scheduled, then voting for Jeffries at the last possible minute.
I am aware that the secret ballot is non-binding and just serves as a way for Republicans to get a feel for which candidates their party can support. If Jeffries getting 5 votes actually affected anything, there would be no way that I could convince anyone in this hypothetical to go along with the plan.
This is would be a warning. The relatively small number of representatives that have been able to paralyze the house are only able to do so because they have enough votes to prevent any nominee from getting by on Republican votes alone. But their unwillingness to support their party’s nominees and the way they’ve treated their own party members as the enemy is only increasing the divide.
The extremists are overplaying their hand because they need the whole party to go along with their bullshit, while the moderates can block just as effectively, but can also cross the aisle. Realistically, that would mean finding a compromise that Democrats could support. But theoretically, if a group of 5 or more moderates were determined to put an end to this and felt strongly enough about preventing a particularly bad nominee from getting pushed through, they could hand the speakership over to the Democrats without warning.
Putting in 5 votes for Hakeem Jeffries in the secret ballot would be a way of warning the party that it needs to pick a nominee that can be supported by the majority, and particularly the moderates. It would be telling the MAGA holdouts that they have to choose between a compromise candidate that they can support or they’ll get one that the Democrats can support
I wouldn’t expect Republicans to actually make a deal with Democrats to make Jeffries the speaker. I think the deal they would have to negotiate would be to get Democrats to support a Republican who is less objectionable to both sides, and who isn’t going to be held hostage by the whims of whoever wants to be the least reasonable.
So… ha ha, on the surface this is “lol Republicans are a clown show” but wtf actually happened? Did someone threaten his family? Is there video of him doing morse code with blinks? We can all laugh now but I don’t think this is a win for anyone.
Trump torpedoed him earlier in the day with a post on his own social network saying that Emmer never really supported him or the MAGA view of things, accused him of being a “globalist” and a Republican in Name Only and mentioned he had voted to certify the 2020 presidential election result. In short, Trump made sure everyone knew the guy was only Lawful Evil and not batshit crazy, therefore unqualified to lead the GOP.
Trump said no and his lemmings jumped off the cliff.
Lemmings don’t actually do that; Disney threw lemmings off a cliff because it made for a more compelling documentary:
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/white-wilderness-lemming-suicide/
This makes the analogy even more apt.
“Trump said no and drove the lemmings off the cliff”
If this shitshow didn’t have drastic consequences, and if Republican voters were capable of thought, this would be hilarious news. As it is, it’s becoming increasingly likely that the Republicans will not be able to find anyone to act as their Speaker, and will not work with the Democrats just to get someone in the seat to pass legislature. That makes the threat of the looming shutdown very real and terrifying, and Republican voters will just keep voting for this kind of obstructive nonsense.
All the Trump supporters I’ve talked to have been cheering this on. They don’t believe there will be actual consequences to a government shutdown. They don’t realize that the adults in the room have been preventing them from feeling consequences for years.
At this rate, to end this shitshow once and for all, I would like to propose a solution that will satisfy everyone and volunteer myself as the Speaker of the House.
- Red blooded all-American woman from the mean streets of Queensland, New York. (Shh…)
- An actor, like the hero of the Republican Party, Ronald Reagan.
- Nominated for an Academy Award for playing a Fox News employee, so probably pretty good at pretending to be a Republican too.
- Expert in Houses (especially of the dream variety)
- Top moderator of a 20K+ member internet community on an obscure technology forum, which is more governing experience than most US Congressmen.
- Usually have good takes on everything.
- Better looking than Marjorie Taylor Green.
I am literally the perfect candidate for the position, vote for Margot!
(But if I can be serious for a moment, this House Speaker thing is getting completely ridiculous.)
Miss Robbie, you have a very packed schedule this year. Should you really be running for political office?
If Trump did it then why not? Can’t do worse than him
I don’t know when the strike is going to end, so my schedule’s pretty empty right now.
The goal of the republican party is to prove to American voters that government is incompetent. I’d say mission accomplished!
Usually have good takes on everything
Unacceptable. I demand an immediate vote of no confidence whenever a good take is made.
Sigh. As soon as Harley Quinn throws her hat in the ring, they elect some joker.
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Meanwhile in Europe, a well-renowned newspaper (the “Neue Züricher Zeitung”) calls the Republicans “Partei der Putschisten” (“Coupist Party”) in their headline. Yep, people are not blind out there…
Bunch of god damn clowns
In all seriousness, if the People’s business isn’t being conducted, how can they possibly be getting paid or getting benefits?
I said it in another post that Emmer may have been a decent compromise for Dems to extend an olive branch. I’m not saying they’re at fault at all, just that he seemed reasonable.
For the hundredth time- it’s not on Democrats to unfuck Republicans. If they want to actually be adults they can come to Democrats and offer up their own “olive branch.”
Let the fuckers stew in their own shit and maybe some people will finally wake the fuck up that Republicans aren’t at all fit to manage a Wendy’s, let alone govern the country.
I’d say the Democrats should extend an olive branch at the price of heavy concessions, or try to get a few Republicans to vote for Jeffries. Unfortunately, neither concessions or getting someone to cross the aisle will happen, so…guess we’re back to square one.
EDIT: Why the downvotes? Literally, I said the Republicans wouldn’t go for something that is workable and potentially advantageous to the Democrats.
The Republicans are completely untrustworthy. The party has built itself on the idea of “owning the libs” which has killed all compromises.
The only olive branch the Dems should offer is “we’ll keep things functioning if you abstain from the next speaker vote”. They don’t need anything else. The majority of Dems aren’t the socialist communists Republicans like to fearmonger over
That’s exactly my point. Their olive branch should come with rule changes, committee re-shufflings, etc. to get the Democrats in a more powerful, better position. But like you said, the Republicans won’t go for that because they’re intransigent, so…back to square one.
You’re getting downvotes for suggesting the Democrats should be the ones reaching out. No. That’s on the Republicans. The most we should be doing is saying “we’re voting for our choice. If you want to end the madness, vote with us.” That’s it.
I said it in another post that Emmer may have been a decent compromise for Dems to extend an olive branch.
Emmer withdrew without ever having a vote by the full house. He chose to withdraw because he couldn’t convince 217 republicans to support him in the private, republican-only votes. At no point did he seek support from democrats, or even give them a chance to vote for him. Republicans are clearly not interested in any olive branches from democrats.
Fair point. If they’re bent on pushing it through along party lines, I can’t imagine a single nominee that’ll satisfy the fringe.
I think it’s just always been party line. Bipartisanship is mostly dead these days too so it’s a tough time.
Eventually we are going to be talking about the democrats bailing them out for nothing because we are about to run out of funding for the government among other things.
This is the republican agenda. Get nothing done, blade democrats.
Everyone check your email; at this rate we’ll all get a shot at being House Speaker at some point.
I have an old pork loin in my fridge that I should have thrown out already. How about that for Speaker?
If the Republicans’ Clearing House Sweepstakes knocks on your door, don’t answer it
Huh. What do you know, he’s good at counting votes after all.
He’d make a great speaker
