spoiler
Ive kinda considered quiet quitting mg transition, I feel like few take it serrious, and my friends that do it feels like they are just being nice to me cause they feel bad that my dreams just are not possible. At this point ive kinds reached the idea that I’ll just boymode forever and hope they silently change my ID back to male so I can just go back into the closet while still on HRT since its so far in the past 2 years made virtually zero difference for me. I dont wanna get off hrt but at the same time, I know I’ll never be seen my general population as a women. I just feel like its too late since I started at 200+ lbs and fat couldn’t redistirube properly so ive permently missed out of stuff like hips and more femine views. Someone here acually said I didn’t look a day over 35, I’m 22. I just feel like being in the closet and just looking like a nobody dude, who avoids talking to people is the best course of action. If I’m lucky the second hand smoke I grew up with will kill me when I’m 40.
You’re fucking 22. The human body is immensely maleable, and you have an enormous amount of time. HRT doesn’t change your body. It dictates how your body will tend to change. The fat on your body isn’t moved into a more feminine shape. Your new hormonal makeup will cause you to burn old fat and deposit new fat in different places and ways. If you dedicate yourself to changing your body, your body will change into a feminine shape. Stop dooming yourself before you’ve taken yourself seriously and given yourself the time and effort you deserve. I’m in my mid 30s. I assumed, based on both research and online anecdotes, that my hips wouldn’t change much if at all. This winter I’m gonna need all new pants. The pants that fit my slightly softer hips last year barely hold me now. I have no comfortable pants because I changed more than the data suggested I would. Start taking yourself seriously. Give yourself the same respect you would give a sympathetic stranger. You’ll beat me to thriving by a decade.
Dedicate myself how? Sorry if I sound stupid
You have to consistently make choices that put your wellbeing and your goals first. If you want to change your body, do it. I can’t say how that looks for you and your life. Be active and treat your body well. Those are the only universals.
yeah it’s just hard being lower income, and suffering from binge. people see it as a binary loose weight and feel better, or stay the same and feel like shit but for me it’s harder.
Like I said, I don’t know what that looks like for you. But eating well and being active can be cheap. I eat healthier when I’m extra broke. I have a handful of dirt cheap meals I can eat on repeat like a robot because that’s how I’m weird about food. I understand that it’s difficult. At your age, I was in the depths of what would be my greatest mental health crisis to date. I was years away from the psychological stability to transition and worked at basically minimum wage for most of those years. What’s important is your drive and direction. You have to be genuine and consistent in both. It’s not easy. It’s hard and it hurts. And you still do the work to be the person you want to be. Do as much or as little as you can every day, but keep doing the work.