If you are thinking about harming yourself — get immediate crisis support. Connect to a crisis counselor 24/7, 365 days a year, from anywhere in the U.S via text, chat, or phone. The Trevor Project is 100% confidential and 100% free.
If you are thinking about harming yourself — get immediate crisis support. Connect to a crisis counselor 24/7, 365 days a year, from anywhere in the U.S via text, chat, or phone. The Trevor Project is 100% confidential and 100% free.
Whirlwind of a week! Spent it with my in-laws. We ran a race this weekend, and I wore my pride socks in public for the first time. The person in front of me at the starting line was wearing a progress pride flag as a cape, and I said “thank you”. My sister-in-law clued in and was asking my spouse what was going on while they ran, so after I set a new PR I came out to her. “Ok, as long as you’re happy” was almost immediately followed by the gobsmacked " omg, you must be really upset with things right now". So I guess that’s a win. It was nice being in a public place where I didn’t constantly hear hateful gibberish and saw people openly being themselves (including employees; those butterfly earrings were gorgeous!) so a good trip in all. My spouse’s parents still don’t know, though. One week at a time!
On another note, nobody told me voice training was going to be this bad. Yes, I followed the guides and the videos. I also see a professional. The LPR damage is making it very difficult, though!
yes, voice training is so difficult, lol - but honestly somewhere around 6 - 8 months of intensive practice I managed to break through and it got a lot easier - I think it’s harder to get my brain to actually coordinate a feminine voice at first than it is later to habituate a feminine voice with practice, so basically it gets easier over time, just very slowly. Still, a year goes by and it’s a radically different place than where you started.
I fully expected to not having a passing voice maybe ever, or maybe not without 5+ years of training. I was surprised when my voice therapist had nothing left to help me with and I graduated within a year, and when I started to pass on the phone and in public with ease. It’s still not real to me, and my voice is one of my greatest sources of dysphoria - but my goals were to pass with a natural sounding female voice, not necessarily to resolve voice dysphoria (which might require more extreme feminization, ironically to the point where it comes across as too young or out of place to most people’s ears - dysphoria is a brain worm that distorts perception).