to clarify, the only person’s opinion of you you should truly care about is your own, it is valuable to consider others, but you decide for yourself and only you.

  • Smorty [she/her]English
    7·
    2 days ago

    soooo it’s bigoted men who we shouldn’t pay attention to. but that’s like --.-_,.-nothing new >~<

    also i’ve never heard peeps say that ever before… maybe cuz im not from the freedom country…

    every time i see one of the posts going "This guy told that woman ‘i think u would look nicer without makeup’ " and he’s being portraid negatively, i always thought

    but like… what if he like . . .-… idk, what if he means it genuinely, in a non-destructive, non-controlling way?.. like “Hey, we’ve known each other for some time now, and … idk if u think so too, but i think that lipgloss might be just a bit too… aggressive? If u like it it’s totally fine, im very happy if that is the case. I just wanted to share my opinion on this, since u also tell me sometime that my tie looks off or stuff like that”.

    Also, i feel it’s weird this is being specifically targeted at men. This might just be me having a weird internal fight of “Men are awful cuz capitalism and selfish” and “Men can be so super nice, let’s not assume the worst all the time”, idk…

    If another women were to tell some woman that some makeup might be just a lil too much, would that be much better? If so, i feel that is rather unfair… ;(

    • TotallynotJessicaMEnglish
      15·
      2 days ago

      The problem is that men generally don’t understand that even “no makeup” looks still feature makeup. I’d also be kinda annoyed if a woman commented negatively on my appearance without solicitation. Like, maybe I want my makeup to be aggressive, stfu!

      • RowRowRowYourBot@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        5·
        2 days ago

        The amount of times I see people praising a “no-makeup” look when the person has on eyeliner and mascara is way too often. Like have you never seen your own face before?

          • RowRowRowYourBot@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
            3·
            2 days ago

            My favorite ones are the “no makeup/filters” photos where the skin tone is perfectly even across the face which is of course impossible without foundation.

    • Lucy (she/them)English
      10·
      2 days ago

      I’m not from the eagle country either (though not in a better place) and by being quite close with my femme relatives I’ve seen this shit happen on many occasions.

      It’s almost never polite, it’s never “well I think that would be better”. Oftentimes the “advice” is done with an insult, e.g. by comparing a woman to a prostitute.

      Usually they’re just strangers who has no business telling her how she should dress. And yes, if it was a woman saying this it would still be equally bad. But it’s rarely a woman, 99% of the time it’s a man.

      Yeah, the premise that all men must be ignored is bad but it’s the emotional response that often develops after yet another such an idiot opens his mouth.