I think I need to call ICE and turn myself in. I’m from somewhere like Barbados, New Zealand, Uruguay or Italy…I’ve been living in the US for sooooo long that my English is practically perfect. Please deport me. My home country misses my economic contributions.
> go to the US as a traveler from eastern europe > get caught by ice > claim you're a french canadian, your accent is actually just an even weirder french > get deported > free asylum in canadaPart of the dystopian horror is learning they don’t care where you came from, and often will deposit you right into the hands of human traffickers.
And they’ll lock foreign-looking American citizens in a room with no contact and no lawyer and say You have forty-eight hours to prove your citizenship. Good luck. Followed by deportation as above. So no, your birth certificate in a hospital in San Diego will not help you.
And between those places are the detention centers that are packed at over double maximum safe occupancy, which get super dirty and super infected, and the ICE troopers / PSCs would beat the crap out of people for fun.
Some of the scary bits of the German Reich concentration camp program are already happening here in the US.
I don’t know if you know this…Shitposting is a way of blowing off stress.
I get that a lot. I am, however, against ostriching.
Uruguay it is then! Please threaten to send me to a country that has 98% renewable energy and a haven for all things open source. I just might be able to survive with my limited knowledge of Esperanto!
YOU WON’T BELIEVE THIS FREE TRAVEL HACK coming to TikTok soon
yes please deport me to a place with healthcare.
Been living in the US for so long that I pronounce buoy like a complete psychopath.
Sounds like the brain damage has set in. Run child, save yourself!!
BooEee
It seems like a real waste to put all those vowels in words just to ignore them.
We took them from the Welsh, gotta find somewhere to stick them.
Well you can fuck off to the back of the queue, bouy
Yeah, I was kind of wondering if there was a list of countries from which I could choose to be deported to. I mean my parents were American and I was born in America but that doesn’t matter anymore, right. It would be great to be deported to someplace nice. I quite liked New Zealand when I visited. Do they take requests?
I see well without any documentation we’ll have to run a DNA analysis to try and determination your nation of birth.
Results are back. 23 and Me reports Yemen with 82% confidence. Wheels up in 10.
Great deport my ass to France, got to better rhere then here.
Your discount version of 23 and Me came back as Algeria?
How to get a free flight (100% foolproof trick)
ukranian you say?
I don’t get the post. I don’t think there are illegal immigrants from Italy or new Zealand in the USA.
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The joke is that OP is not actually undocumented, but wants to turn themselves in to get the free flight to these travel destinations.
Thanks for explaining the joke.
