I was perplexed by the question. What’s the difference? They explained: “Should I tiptoe and watch my manners around you or be blunt? Flirtatious or chill? Brag about my sexual conquests or talk about our feelings? When you’re sad, do I hug you and buy you ice cream or do we go grab some beers? Should I wonder if we’ll ever hook up?”
I’m not sure if I’m more appalled or confused by this mindset. I thought everyone treated their friends the same regardless of their gender identity. Is this just a fringe case of toxic masculinity, or is this really how the average cis person sees the world?
Yes, the word person/persona literally means ‘mask’. Wearing different “masks” is a common human behaviour.
Do you know about racialization? Gender works in a similar way. Children are taught since early age that they need to follow different “rulesets” when interacting with boys and girls.
That’s really interesting, I didn’t know that. On deeper thought, I do act differently in the workplace than I do in a dive bar or in a museum. But I’m getting hung up on treating people differently based on their gender. It would be strange to me to speak to a female-presenting colleague differently than a male-presenting one.
Some people prefere to be treated differently. And some don’t. People in my bubble treat each other mostly equaly (except for the flirting bit I guess), but I know women that hate men swearing in their presence and men who feel awkward if you tell them about your feelings too much. I suppose you can choose from each of his question the option that suits you, no matter the gender stereotype it’s associated with.