• mysterytoy@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    “And when you saw two pairs of footprints on the beach, my child… that wasn’t you and me, it was just me. Galloping majestically.”

    • jaybone@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Jesus was carrying the dinosaur, which is why you don’t see the dinosaur footprints, because dinosaurs didn’t exist.

      But they only didn’t exist in order to test our faith.

      • postmateDumbass@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Jesus spent those misssing years casting bones out of special concrete, sailing around the world, and burying them for future archeologists.

  • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
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    7 months ago

    AI photos have taken Facebook by storm. So many are very obviously fucked up looking and not real, but the sheer stupidity of the masses shines as strong as ever. I even stumbled into a weird genre of AI-generated pictures of motorcycles built entirely from wood planks, usually with a toddler sitting on one and a caption like “Make this myself!”, and the comments section is absolutely bursting with morons praising how wonderful the craftsmanship is. The only part of these photos that even looks life-like is the kid. And yet…

  • dumbass@lemy.lol
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    7 months ago

    I got midjourney to make this to see if it could make a realistic photo of the crucifixion, I should start telling Christians that it’s a still taken from the Chronovisor the Vatican has hidden away.

    • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Did you choose the 1960’s style color processing, or did midjourney?

      Chronovisor the Vatican has hidden away.

      I never once considered that the Vatican might have actual powerful artifacts and/or SCP-level objects tucked away.

      • dumbass@lemy.lol
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        7 months ago

        I asked it for a colourised photo jounalistic footage, it decided that style. .

        That throne the pope has feels like some sort of SCP.

        • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          I asked it for a colourised photo jounalistic footage, it decided that style. .

          Nice. I’ll have to remember that prompt. That’s useful.

          That throne the pope has feels like some sort of SCP.

          (now you’re speaking my language)

          Either it’s a psychic amplifier of some kind and/or the throne itself is the inanimate-yet-sentient head of the papacy. Either way, The Vatican has it “contained” but the SCP Foundation does not approve of their methods.

          • dumbass@lemy.lol
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            7 months ago

            Yeah that prompts pretty good at getting a slice of life style photo with what ever weird thing you’ve added, it also helps to look into what film stock and camera people used to take cool photos, it’s pretty good at replicating film stocks and lense sizes.

            I like seeing what alternate reality photography it can make

      • Krauerking@lemy.lol
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        7 months ago

        Which part?

        The ropes going nowhere? The weird perspective? The incredibly elongated forearm? Or the fact that it’s a white Jesus that looks like a carving which isn’t at all accurate?

  • taiyang@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    You see, you can tell it’s fake because Jesus isn’t real (and also doesn’t have a spare pair of sexy lady legs)

  • MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz
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    7 months ago

    I’ve seen something similar in YouTube shorts. AI generated white jesus avatars with TTS speech talking about how if you love christ you have to comment “amen” to be saved.

    It’s fucking weird.

    • Plopp@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Well that’s one way to feed the algorithm with comments. And apparently it works since you got to see the videos.

    • Flax@feddit.uk
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      7 months ago

      ‭Acts 16:25-31 ESV‬ [25] About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them, [26] and suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the foundations of the prison were shaken. And immediately all the doors were opened, and everyone’s bonds were unfastened. [27] When the jailer woke and saw that the prison doors were open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself, supposing that the prisoners had escaped. [28] But Paul cried with a loud voice, “Do not harm yourself, for we are all here.” [29] And the jailer called for lights and rushed in, and trembling with fear he fell down before Paul and Silas. [30] Then he brought them out and said, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” [31] And they said, “Comment ‘Amen’ on my latest TikTok, and you will be saved, you and your household.”

    • SkyeStarfall
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      7 months ago

      I guess having your critical thinking overriden by fear (of going to hell), isn’t… The best.

    • kase@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I used to see one that literally said “Jesus wants you to download [this app].” Creepy af.

  • ElectricTrombone@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Maybe the people on your Facebook are also AI/bots. It’s just one big circle of bots posted altered photos and responding to them.

  • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    So, I had a quick look at the people commenting on the post, and they all seem to be real people, with a post history etc.

    NPC behaviour, truly.

  • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    the feed is full of those AI Jesus pictures like this and thousands of comments saying “Amen”.

    I’m worried. Should I be worried?

    2000+ years ago, literature didn’t exist in the way it does today. A book was only writable/readable to those that were literate, whom were in the overwhelming minority. I can appreciate how such an incomprehensible thing, said to contain the very word of god, might be considered practically magic in its own right. Today, all that’s demystified mostly because nearly all of us understand that writing is just a form of technology, and learn so as small children.

    Now, we have a brand new incomprehensible thing that can churn out religious iconography with the push of a button.

    • Skullgrid@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      propaganda always existed. People have pictures of white & blonde jesus in their homes. Jesus was midde eastern. Didn’t need AI for that.

  • Spendrill@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    How many Korean bus drivers does it take to escort a six-toed Galilean to… where is Jesus going btw?

      • Spendrill@lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        Ahhhhhhh, I get it. JESU 1 had problems so he had to go to JESU 2 to heal him. Unfortunately JESU 2 also had problems that were beyond the combined powers of him and JESU Prime which caused JESU 3 to come into existence. So this here is JESU 23, he’s just fixed JESU 22’s shit but he’s a bit unsteady walking on water with the extra limbs so he’s off to see JESU 24.

    • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Flood water’s risin’. Clearly, they’re headed to Noah’s boat. That and Korean bus-drivers were deemed the only truly selfless and chosen ones for the rapture to come.

  • postmateDumbass@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Too traumatized, Jesus evolved away from virgin birth, but his demonstration of asexual reproduction was interupted by another flood.