To whom it will concern
“I hope this email finds you before I do”
Stupid. They will dig it out in court. Only personal and in private.
Removed by mod
“I’m going to teach you that having kneecaps is a privilege, not a human right”.
Tom Nook? Is that you?
I will moisten your socks
Take it easy there, Satan.
You’re a mean bastard. Hehe
Enjoy your next 24 hours
General well wishes with zero actual threat that come off as extremely threatening
I’ll clog your toilet
I will upper decker your favorite toilet
I’m going to show your toilet #3.
I used to RP a character in Ultima Online that would threaten people with “I’m going to remove your larynx through your sphincter.”
Okay, I’ll not comment on your comments anymore, I just realized that’s extremely silly
“I will stare into your eyes even after you blink”.
“I want to collect your shadow”
It’s from the band Craft’s song I Want To Commit Murder. Pretty great black metal.
Sounds more creepy romantic than threatening, like something a stalker would say.
There’s a repeated line in “Once Upon A Time” that is supposed to be romantic, but taken from another point of view is very unsettling.
“I will find you. I will always find you”
I’ll hit you until I pass out
I will salt your papercuts.
I will grate your cheese.
I shall end your bloodline, with a spoon.
I will grate your cheese.
I mean I’m making quesadillas so that’d be great… er, very nice of you.
the spoon thing tho that’s pretty good
“… Why a spoon, cousin?”
“I’m about to become the reason your children will have nightmares”
Where I’m from, there’s the expression “you’d look good in a binbag”, which is supposed to mean that you’d even look good wearing a binbag, but I’ve always thought it sounds like someone wants to chop you up and throw you in the bin.
When asked what their biggest fear is most people say stuff like “spiders” and “heights”… And I’m always like “why is never anyone thinking about being tortured to death?” is there something worse? I doubt it
Being tortured almost to death is worse, because, once you recover, they can do it all over again
Being tortured to death and brought back multiple times then set free. No amount of therapy will guide you out of the woods after that.
