• Transporter Room 3@startrek.website
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    1 year ago

    I tell my wife this all the time.

    You didn’t ask to be here, you don’t owe your parents anything even if they weren’t abusive shitstains, stop setting yourself on fire to keep them warm.

    • squeakycat@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      I tell this to myself often. Yet it is so very hard to actually believe it and act upon it with the amount of baggage that brings with it. :/

  • Pennomi@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Oops, I actually did promise to do things to the best of my ability. How fucked am I?

  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    My daughter loves to draw and for a while, she was watching videos of artists who are much better (and a lot older) than her and got upset and even tried to throw out her sketchbooks because she wasn’t anywhere near as good as they were.

    I told her that she’s 13. They might have gone to art school. She doesn’t have to be as good as them yet. She might never be as good as them. But she has to keep trying.

    And when she draws something she doesn’t like and starts talking about how she’s not a good artist, I tell her that even Picasso had painted paintings he hated.

  • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    Okay, well, this changes things.

    I have long held the belief that I didn’t ask to be born, but since I was, I’m now forced to live a life because I refuse to end it myself.

    However, I had not, until now, applied that same sense of logic to work ethic. It’s true, I have not ever agreed to do my best except by volunteering it. People have told me to do my best, I’ve said that I will do my best, but I don’t think it’s every been the case that someone has asked for me to do my best and I’ve said I will, as an agreement.

    I certainly made no such agreements prior to being alive.

    It’s a good point. One I had not considered until now.

    • stjobe@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I started a new job some months back, and my boss straight up told us in a team meeting “we’re not paying you to give 100% all the time, that’s not possible. We’re paying you for your average effort. Everyone has good days and bad, so don’t worry about it. Just do the job as good as you can on any given day and if we were right in hiring you, that will be enough.” Kind of blew my mind and confirmed I’d done the right thing signing with that company.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I had a math class in college where the professor gave us quizzes on Fridays instead of giving us any homework and then after the quiz told us we shouldn’t study too hard on the weekend because we were young and should have fun.

        I hate math. I’m some sort of math-illiterate. But I enjoyed that professor.

    • PennyAndAHalf@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, I think this “advice” is context dependent, such as for dealing with toxic family or employers or during an existential crisis. I’m obligated to be, at the very least, “good enough” for the children I bring into the world. And I strive to be good to and for the people around me, because I prefer to be around people who would do the same for me. “Fuck ‘em” as an attitude at a societal level will make the world mediocre.