cursed cuisine
West Virginia
Country roads, take me the hell away from here.
As anyone who has ever set foot in that shithole can attest
You’ve not from West Virginia if you never lived in West Virginia
1950s cuisine. Stick some carrots in there for decoration.
Yeah, and suspend it in some savory gelatin.
While on benzedrine. Happy days.
Can I just have the Benzedrine and pass on the rest? It suppresses my appetite anyway.
Yes you can, but you will miss out on an overdose of Vitamine A sweety.
I’ll have a carrot
And here is the site that started the modern world down that road of horror all the way back in the late 1990s: https://lileks.com/institute/gallery/index.html
That looks a lot like ground and congealed SPAM.
My colorblindness makes it look like concrete to me.
I bet you wouldn’t be able to taste the difference ™️
Much, much saltier than concrete.
Where’s the food crimes comm when you need it?
In America? Just be thankful there’s not Velveeta and ketchup on it.
I once fasted for 72 hours, just to see what it would be like to run out of glycogen and be truly hungry. I still probably wasn’t hungry enough to eat aspic. Perhaps if I were starving after another day or two? Still, I feel like there’s a chance I would rather die.
that is wild. I just don’t think i could swallow it without violently retching.
Yeah, it checks all the boxes: texture, temperature, taste, smell, viscosity, and appearance. There’s little about it that isn’t an egregious affront to the senses. I will say this for it, though: it reduces waste, is potentially nutritious, preserves well, and is generally nontoxic.
This is fine, but I prefer it when you take the pie, put it into a food processor, compress it into a log and then slice it to serve on sandwich bread. Serving it just sliced out of the pie is lazy.
TIL James Taylor has a song called “Country Road.”
It is not about West Virginia.
So that’s the ham pie Amanda was talking about
Silly Putty Pie. Yumm
I see lots of references to John Denver, Country Roads, but I present:
“Bye, bye Miss Bologna Pie”
Doc saw my arteries, said I would die…
May I suggest:
Doc took one look at my arteries and started to cry
Them surgery boys pumped propofol now I’m high
Singin’ this’ll be the day that I die…
Why not use liverwurst at that point? I guess it’s guaranteed gout.
The finger imprints in bottom left make this visual much more striking.
That does not look like a real recipe.
This, however, is a real recipe: https://www.food.com/recipe/mile-high-bologna-pie-387434
It also starts out with, “if you like bologna, then this is the pie for you.” Does anyone like bologna? Isn’t it more of an “eh… it’ll do” food?
And then there’s this. https://www.justapinch.com/recipes/appetizer/meat-appetizer/bologna-cake.html
It has Worcestercire sauce in it, so you know it’s gotta be some good bologna cake.
A couple of family members like fried bologna sandwiches, but I’m pretty sure it’s
because of past traumanostalgia more than flavor.Yeah, this feels a lot more like “okay, well I can’t afford to make my kids good, nutritious food, but bologna is super cheap, so maybe I can make it taste acceptable” sort of dish that certain unfortunate people grew up with.
I grew up with family on the OH/WV border and some in WV and I’ve never seen the abomination in the picture.
I really like bologna. I’ll eat it by itself fresh outta the fridge as a snack sometimes.
