- cross-posted to:
- programmer_humor@programming.dev
- cross-posted to:
- programmer_humor@programming.dev
I must have learned programming wrong, then, because dear ducking god, the amount of incompetent shit I have to see is surreal.
One system we’ve got from a different state was marketed as having geolocation. It doesn’t. All object relations have to be created manually in a separate page, as in, you register a city, then register an address, THEN, on a different page, you connect the two. Now imagine this for some 24 objects. It has some specific profile permissions hard coded by id (like, only profile with id 4 can create some stuff)
This is just the shit I remember off the top of my head. The cherry on top is that they didn’t validate unique emails for users, you could have 999 users with the same email and no way for them to reset their passwords. I asked why: “we didn’t think about it”
I asked why: “we didn’t think about it”
I have Simon Pegg in Hot Fuzz ringing in my ears: “IT’S YOUR JOB!”
You won’t have time after spending all day complaining about bad documentation.
Nah, I complain more about things. Especially ones that should work. “Oh you didn’t test this in my preferred browser and now it only works in Chrome, idiot”. I can see the error and I know why the shortcut was taken or the test that would have caught it was skipped and it pisses me off.
Sometimes it’s deadlines and outside forces and not laziness, and for those the coder is forgiven. And sometimes the bug is hilarious and not frustrating. But if you have an e-commerce site, basic utility, healthcare portal, or other required site that is broken because you couldn’t be arsed to test with something other chrome on a desktop monitor then fuck right off.
Tbh, while it is funny out-of-context, I encountered the same exact thing (and I can guaran-fuckin-tee the offender used copilot for this).
It’s not funny to be on the receiving end of this, ESPECIALLY in professional environment, where you should not react like that 😅
I agree, but would like to add I find AI generated code without thought or care put into understanding it more offensive than this to begin with.
I am still complaining, but now I blame the managers
“wow, what director level ass pushed them so hard that they had to leave that bug in?”
I think of the T-pose all the time in cyberpunk, that was a bug that was horrible but obviously it was tracked somewhere, and some director was like “it’s fine, ship it”
Still stuck on FF15. So much time and energy invested in reinventing Unreal Engine… badly. Then they have to attack the corners of the actual story with a hacksaw to push a title seven years in development out the door half baked.
There was a Dead or Alive game in which a manager literally released it before it was ready without consulting with the team. The game was still in beta and a glitchy mess.
The PS2 version of DoA2? I vaguely recall reading about it, also how the Dreamcast version turned out to be the complete one.
I start to appreciate games that implement complex and sometimes rarely noticeable (immersive, boo) mechanics that come off naturally. And I notice how a thought pattern behind bad ones could’ve progressed.
Bugs? My favs are buggy to the point some of these bugs became their own mechanics. I only get annoyed when the game bores me out, and if bugs can’t make me feel like it, it’s fine. And some better-done games are pretty boring to me.
Bugs? My favs are buggy to the point some of these bugs became their own mechanics
This is pretty much half of competitive Brood War.
That’s the spirit.
Dying to a stupid bug is a great way to suddenly get frustrated though. Hard agree with you though, buggy games are my favorite. Especially small indie projects because I you can find the great bugs.
Dying to a bug in indie game can be so hilarious some youtubers in niche game communities got their rep from doing compilations of these. Case in point: PhanracK of WH:VT2 fame: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGlWiMg3bUg
Have you got some like this to follow?
I don’t know any YouTubers other than “Let’s Game It Out”.
My fav game to speedrun is Neon Boost (free on Steam) because of several bugs I have found in the game. Otherwise a small boring indie platformer about rocket jumping is made fun (to me) through exploitation of its physics.
- Diagonal movement is faster (hold two adjacent directional keys). Sliding makes you even faster.
- Precise rocket jumps can receive more velocity than the developers intended, allowing you to skip many parts.
- You can touch the end of stage goal post from underneath the platform.
- You can wall jump off of the top of walls, allowing for many skips and time saves.
- You can get massive upwards velocity by sliding into a small couple-pixel ridge and jumping precisely once you touch it. This is possible on the starting platforms of all World 1 levels. It basically only improves individual level speedrun records, except on one level where you can skip the whole level and complete it in 1 second (an 9x faster than intended.
My crowning achievement was completing the final level of World 1 (1-12) in 18 seconds. The Devs expected a fastest time around 40 sec.
If you learn to code, you learn that major bugs in releases are horrible and indicative of neglect.
In a professional sense my experience is that they’re more often the result of under-staffing and rigid, fixed release schedules.
And changing priorities and scope.
Yeah, it shouldn’t happen in a release. But, if I had a penny for every time I’ve seen the last minute development that wasn’t tested yet and not even due for the current release squeezed in. I’d literally have a pound, or dollar or whatever else has 100 pennies in.
or whatever else has 100 pennies in
Well it’d be 8 shillings, 4 pence, in pre-decimal British currency.
I sometimes suspect that the push for decimalisation was in part to avoid having to teach computers the old system.
Afaik it actually was, the UK wanted to move more financial calculations to computers and it was a lot easier to use a decimal currency for that
Programming a robust global date-time system and having a transparent conversation between metric and *imperial/traditional" units is just a warm-up to show that you can work with the truly demented currency system. Make sure everything is rounded off to the nearest whole ha’penny.
And sheer pigheaded stubbornness.
Yeah, I learned to code almost 20 years ago in order to mod video games, and learned that many bugs and massive problems in mods and games are caused by coders being either extremely lazy or making extremely dumb decisions.
In general, a ginormous problem with basically all software is technical debt and spaghetti code making things roughly increase in inefficiency and unneccesarry, poorly documented complexity at the same rate as hardware advances in compute power.
Basically nobody ever refactors anything, its just bandaids upon bandaids upon bandaids, because a refactor only makes sense in a 1 or 2 year + timeframe, but basically all corporations only exist in a next quarter timeframe.
This Jack Forge guy is just, just starting to downslope from the peak of the dunning kruger graph of competence vs confidence.
Here’s a copy of that image without the watermarks
Didn’t even see the watermarks.
Thanks!
I unironically need glasses.
Now i complain about both the bugs in my games and the bugs in other games
Learn to code and you’ll wonder how in the hell some bugs even got created
That’s not true - I’m complaining about the bugs in our software almost every day!
My favorite part is guessing what they do that results in the bug!
Right?? That’s one of my favorite aspects, like there’s a weird bug and you can kind of backtrack what happened like “Oh I wasn’t supposed to jump out of the car I had to walk through the precise path, I missed the trigger or something I guess??”
Yes, because you’ll be too busy being infuriated by badly designed user interfaces that you realize could have so easily been better.
Show a man some bugs and he will be miserable for one day.
Teach a man how to code bad and he will be miserable for his whole life.Yandere dev be like: 17000 line main class, take it or leave it
“what is this switch case you speak of?”
True words by a wise programmer
Not true, I bitch about them more than ever
“Who fast-tracked this shit?” -me
“It’s a small change, should be safe, we will test it in production” -also me
Understanding how software is made, and what are best software engineering practices to make stable software only makes hate AAA studios that release overpriced crashy messes even more.
More nuanced reply: I do tend to complain
- less about certain bugs and limitations, where I can understand that the problem is harder than it seems
- and more about others, where I have to imagine a poor intern dragged around by bad advice for several sprints, finally marking the task done (forehead sweating and all), even though they did not really know what they were doing even for a minute.