And apparently, also when you think that ‘They’ is a perfectly serviceable gender-neutral singular pronoun, but are willing to use other pronouns if asked to.

EDIT: Other removable offenses on Blahaj now include questioning mod/admin decisions and quoting the modlog as a reason why you’re leaving.

  • spujb@lemmy.cafeEnglish
    3·
    10 days ago

    Or Ada is below the already-low bar of FlyingSquid’s moderation, which is pretty damn low.

    Oof, and there we go. “Ada is worse than the (perhaps second) most universally depised mod” from you says it all, and I’m happy we reached this conclusion.

    To sum up and end it: I don’t believe you are a transphobe, as others have unfortunately claimed.

    But you do have an inappropriate sense of entitlement to an instance owned by a trans woman.

    And, when that trans women made a decision about how to deal with harrassment on her instance, using mod action and suppression of bigoted behavior from all sides rather than allowing bigotry and misgendering, you responded with a full-force rebuke across communities against her that she did not draw the line for her community exactly where you did.

    I hope your time away from blahaj is good for you. Go and talk to trans people. Learn that most of them are so overwhelmed by harassment that they would rather have trolls banned for trolling than endlessly bullied for their gender expression in their spaces.

    You centered yourself in a space that is not yours. That’s your issue. Now it’s your responsibility to get over it.

    • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      2·
      10 days ago

      But you do have an inappropriate sense of entitlement to an instance owned by a trans woman.

      Entitlement is when you leave, I guess.

      Let’s go over the timeline, shall we?

      1. Ada makes decision I do not agree with.

      2. I sadpost and express my discontent with it in the same comment I express an intent to leave, neither of which are on the meta post in which the decision was announced, nor in either was Ada involved as a conversant. In fact, in the course of the sadpost, I say I understand the motivations, it’s just not a place for me.

      3. Ada removes several of those comments for dubious reasons.

      4. I bitch about that on a comm made for bitching about mods.

      5. I get accused of being a transphobe for not believing in dragons on said comm made for bitching about mods.

      6. I am accused of feeling entitled to Blahaj.

      The Tumblr defensive swarm mentality was shite there and it’s shite here, and if I’d realized it was how Blahaj was going to react to people, I never would’ve posted there in the first place.

      Learn to take criticism, or get off the net.

      Please, @spujb@lemmy.cafe outline to me how that timeline is indicative of entitlement.

      • spujb@lemmy.cafeEnglish
        3·
        10 days ago
        • Ada makes decision I do not agree with.

        • I sadpost and express my discontent

        Right there. You tell a trans woman how to run her space. Thats entitlement.

        Now I of course don’t know why the comments were removed, perhaps the entitlement, or more to do with the fact that they encouraged further bad behavior in an already hostile situation.

        But you came into a space that isn’t for you, and told trans people how to handle a situation that doesn’t affect you. Sorry for using emotional language, but your pathetic “sadpost” is a slap in the face to the daily onslaught of harassment trans people face. Then you didn’t stop. Your subsequent days-long crashout proves to me that Ada made the right choice.

        “Learn to take criticism or get off the net instance” yourself. My best wishes for your time away.

        • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
          3·
          10 days ago

          Right there. You tell a trans woman how to run her space. Thats entitlement.

          … “This isn’t for me, so I’m going to leave, even though I understand and don’t denigrate the basic reasoning.”

          “Stop trying to tell her how to run her instance! This is entitlement!”

          Fucking what.

          I specifically mentioned in that very point that you cut off, in case you forgot how to read, that Ada was not in that conversation or thread, nor did I expect her to be.

          But you came into a space that isn’t for you, and told trans people how to handle a situation that doesn’t affect you.

          Literally didn’t tell anyone how to handle the situation in 196. Gave no advice. Made no demands. Jesus Christ.

          Your subsequent days-long crashout proves to me that Ada made the right choice.

          I love that a crashout is when someone doesn’t roll over and commit to a struggle session when accused of being transphobic for not acknowledging dragons as real.

          “Learn to take criticism or get off the net instance” yourself. My best wishes for your time away.

          Fuck’s sake, you’ve taken “I don’t agree with this decision so I’m literally leaving, wish you the best” as some kind of demand for submission.

          Tumblr behavior. Utterly deranged.

          Initially I thought I’d miss Blahaj, but seeing these reactions from Blahaj commenters and defenders here? I feel more like I’ve dodged a bullet now.

            • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
              2·
              10 days ago

              You have fun with your tribalist games in which reality is secondary to whatever weird persecution narrative you want to peddle.

              And try to fix up your reading comprehension.

              I specifically mentioned in that very point that you cut off, in case you forgot how to read, that Ada was not in that conversation or thread, nor did I expect her to be.

              Unless by ‘telling a trans woman how to run her space’ you actually meant ‘not telling a trans woman anything at all, nor saying anything even around said trans woman, nor talking about how to run the space, but expressing an intention to leave the instance in another community entirely’, in which case you need to fix your basic sentence construction instead.

              • spujb@lemmy.cafeEnglish
                2·
                10 days ago

                I specifically mentioned in that very point that you cut off, in case you forgot how to read, that Ada was not in that conversation or thread, nor did I expect her to be.

                Aw, bestie! That’s not how the Lemmy works. You made people uncomfortable, and they reported you for your content, either for what it invited or for what it was on its face. That’s how this works! You do what someone sees as damage to the community, you get reported, Ada sees your comment. If you were truly minsundatood that badly, maybe work on using nicer words. :)

                persecution narrative

                Oh wow. Okay, back up, this makes me think you misunderstand the situation entirely. Did you read the post? Genuinely think this summary might help:

                • Ada: “Okay y’all we’re gonna do an innocent until proven guilty thing here because of our demographic makeup and community goals. Report and block trolling behavior rather than resorting to misgendering and harassment, OK? We want to keep things comfortable for all trans people and for us that never starts with initating the same attacks most of our community faces every day. If you can’t find it in you to engage with users without misgendering and abuse, we’d just prefer you report the user rather than engage. If you do do harrassment, even against a real troll, you will face mod action, mkay?”
                • most of blahaj: “Makes sense, that lines up with a good portion of our user base’s preference too. We’d rather see trolls getting ignored, downvoted, and banned than for harrassment to be normalized here.”
                • Me: “That totally makes sense here too.”
                • You: “Wow fuck yall what a persecution narrative this is literally reason for me to leave.”
                • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
                  3·
                  10 days ago

                  Aw, bestie! That’s not how the Lemmy works. You made people uncomfortable, and they reported you for your content, either for what it invited or for what it was on its face. That’s how this works! You do what someone sees as damage to the community, you get reported, Ada sees your comment. If you were truly minsundatood that badly, maybe work on using nicer words. :)

                  So now it’s not “I told Ada how to run her instance”, it’s “My comment was reported”, glad to see we’re moving goalposts at lightning speed. Jesus H. Christ. Are you going to actually present any argument you’re willing to stand by, or just jump from point to unrelated point in the hopes of making yourself feel like you defended the tribe sufficiently?

                  If you were truly minsundatood that badly, maybe work on using nicer words. :)

                  Did you not fucking read the OP? Holy fucking shit. I didn’t realize saying “I guess Blahaj is now added to the list of instances I avoid when possible. Unfortunate.” was such an aggressive crime in your eyes.

                  Oh, wait, of course I did, anything that’s not total agreement and bootlicking of your online community of choice is an attack against the basic dignity of everyone therein. I forgot I was back on Tumblr.

                  You: “Wow fuck yall what a persecution narrative this is literally reason for me to leave.”

                  Again, demonstrating a below average reading comprehension.

                  Continuing from your summary:

                  Spujb: “That totally makes sense here too.”

                  Me, on a different comm, nowhere near Ada: “Okay, I get it, but this place isn’t for me anymore, I’m going to leave."

                  Ada: [removes comments for ‘gatekeeping’ as noted in the OP]

                  Me: “Well, I’m leaving, but this removal is kind of dogshit, I’m going to bitch about it on a comm for bitching about moderator actions.” [as it appears in the OP]

                  Numerous Blahaj Defenders: “You’re transphobic if you question whether dragonfucker is a gender.”

                  Me: “Wow, now I feel glad that I left Blahaj instead of sad.”

                  Spujb: “You shouldn’t feel entitled to tell Ada what to do!”

                  Me: “Where did you get the idea I told Ada what to do, I literally didn’t and I can outline all of my relevant actions; none of them come close and you know damn well you can’t cite any that involve me telling Ada what to do, even in a vague way, because I never did anything fucking close to that.”

                  Spujb: “You feel entitled to tell Ada what to do!”

                  Me: “What the fuck is this, some kind of persecution complex?”

                  This is not complex. I should not have had to repeat that fucking conversation to anyone over the age of eight, yet here we fucking are.

                  At no point have you engaged with reality here. You just have some sort of desired narrative that you want to cling to, and so you cling to it in the face of all evidence to the contrary. Hell, in the very post I just responded to you accused my posts of being removed for not being worded ‘nice enough’, which doesn’t even vaguely fit the removals cited in the literal OP. I’m not sure if you can’t read it, didn’t read it, or are just too attached to your narrative to read it, but in any case, it’s really rather pathetic, and quite in-line with what I’ve come to expect of you. Well-intentioned (in the sense of ‘desiring a gentle resolution’), but with very little understanding or capability of parsing arguments that don’t fit your axioms. The axiom you’re using here being, of course, “The community I like is always right and I will always defend them regardless of the facts 😊”

                  In the course of this argument, you have ignored evidence provided entirely, deliberately cut off already very-short statements in order to provide an interpretation literally and directly contrary to its explicitly stated details, ignored contradictions when pointed out, and moved goalposts, and yet at no point do you appear to have anything even vaguely resembling self-awareness on any of it. This is either incredibly bad faith on your part, or an incredibly low level of competence, and in either case, you’ve done nothing but waste time with your disingenuous arguments and outright falsehoods.

                  Oh, and no, doing so with a ‘nice tone’ does not change any of that.

                  • spujb@lemmy.cafeEnglish
                    2·
                    10 days ago

                    Did you not fucking read the OP? Holy fucking shit. I didn’t realize saying “I guess Blahaj is now added to the list of instances I avoid when possible. Unfortunate.” was such an aggressive crime in your eyes.

                    You created a space primed for harrassment, dude. Intentionally or not. You’ve seen the descent into bigotry comments sections like those go to? You made a live drama trap for more of the exact behavior admins have the unique goal of fighting to combat. You might as well have titled your sadpost “Hey guys, here’s a space to do the harrassment this entire community is designed around avoiding also I’m leaving.”

                    The mods aren’t obligated to host open honeypots like that, especially not from users self-admittedly on the way out. If it wasn’t intentional, I hope this helps clears things up! Cuz wow.