I didn’t realize there was deep lore in an egg_irl post, i took it as the comic it was.
Without that background information, (that is not included unless i stalk the OP, which doesn’t feel like it would endear anyone to my participation) it feels close to a comic could reinforce the “you can’t win trying to be supportive to queer people these days” energy since there’s nothing clear about there being a boundary made by the other person in the comic? Maybe there’s something i missed on the lemmy ui, I’m willing to admit!
As an older queer i am not quite sure when we decided clothing meant anything (again) since growing up it was something we already tried to work on in the queer community, just look into lesbian spaces and their attempts to uncouple femininity from being required to dress up. Have binary identities and enforcing trans people to present a particular way backfired into hyper gendered expressions being required?
Another question is how can the community help individuals vulnerable to invalidation of parts of their identity? I know everyone needs support as a whole and in general in their lives. The ability to stand strong in yourself in the storm can’t be manufactured without a foundation, and how do we help newbies find that with the atmospheres as tense as they are, even in queer spaces?
It’s okay, I forgot to mark it as Transmasc and Transphobia. Without that there’s no way anyone else could’ve known.
I never intended to have that message, was just trying to share a situation which was uncomfortable and invalidating for me due to someone else assuming my gender (thinking I am AMAB transfem when I’m AFAB and transmasc).
I don’t know if as you said binary identities and expectations of trans people have backfired as you said, I do know that people who follow gender stereotypes have had a tendency sort of force them onto others. It happens a lot to femboys and people say they are an egg or transfem. Which isn’t great on its own but in my case I’m a femboy and transmasc so it’s worse.
It’s hard but I think that having such rigid expectations of presentation isn’t helping. Like, so what if I was AMAB and looked and dressed the way I am, so what. Why would that make me a girl or egg? That doesn’t seem helpful, and at least for an AMAB femboy it wouldn’t be exactly harmful, it’s not always obvious that they are. I’ve met many enbies who had similar experiences with invalidation from gender stereotypes and it sucks.
![egg😣irl [Transmasc] [CW: Transphobia]](https://lemmy.dbzer0.com/pictrs/image/bf39ba1f-b01c-43fd-b899-79756511c574.webp){kind=link}
I didn’t realize there was deep lore in an egg_irl post, i took it as the comic it was.
Without that background information, (that is not included unless i stalk the OP, which doesn’t feel like it would endear anyone to my participation) it feels close to a comic could reinforce the “you can’t win trying to be supportive to queer people these days” energy since there’s nothing clear about there being a boundary made by the other person in the comic? Maybe there’s something i missed on the lemmy ui, I’m willing to admit!
As an older queer i am not quite sure when we decided clothing meant anything (again) since growing up it was something we already tried to work on in the queer community, just look into lesbian spaces and their attempts to uncouple femininity from being required to dress up. Have binary identities and enforcing trans people to present a particular way backfired into hyper gendered expressions being required?
Another question is how can the community help individuals vulnerable to invalidation of parts of their identity? I know everyone needs support as a whole and in general in their lives. The ability to stand strong in yourself in the storm can’t be manufactured without a foundation, and how do we help newbies find that with the atmospheres as tense as they are, even in queer spaces?
It’s okay, I forgot to mark it as Transmasc and Transphobia. Without that there’s no way anyone else could’ve known.
I never intended to have that message, was just trying to share a situation which was uncomfortable and invalidating for me due to someone else assuming my gender (thinking I am AMAB transfem when I’m AFAB and transmasc).
I don’t know if as you said binary identities and expectations of trans people have backfired as you said, I do know that people who follow gender stereotypes have had a tendency sort of force them onto others. It happens a lot to femboys and people say they are an egg or transfem. Which isn’t great on its own but in my case I’m a femboy and transmasc so it’s worse.
It’s hard but I think that having such rigid expectations of presentation isn’t helping. Like, so what if I was AMAB and looked and dressed the way I am, so what. Why would that make me a girl or egg? That doesn’t seem helpful, and at least for an AMAB femboy it wouldn’t be exactly harmful, it’s not always obvious that they are. I’ve met many enbies who had similar experiences with invalidation from gender stereotypes and it sucks.