- cross-posted to:
- weirdnews@real.lemmy.fan
- cross-posted to:
- weirdnews@real.lemmy.fan
Sheriff’s deputies in Washington’s Kitsap County frequently get calls about animals — loose livestock, problem dogs. But the 911 call they received recently from a woman being hounded by dozens of raccoons swarming her home near Poulsbo stood out.
The woman reported having had to flee her property after 50 to 100 raccoons descended upon it and were acting aggressively, said Kevin McCarty, a spokesperson for the sheriff’s office. She told deputies she started feeding a family of raccoons decades ago and it was fine until about six weeks earlier, when the number showing up went from a handful to around 100.
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She… she fed them.
facepalm
This is why you DONT DO THAT.
She deserves her fate, smh.
Or… if you do. feed them from the neighbor’s patio. specifically, the neighbor you don’t like.
Don’t feed the raccoons! Yes, they are very intelligent and adorable. Just talk to them and befriend them, but never ever feed them. Watch the movie Gremlins for more info.
Feed the raccoons after midnight and water them regularly to cause a monster apocalypse. Got it.
I thought I recognized them.
Legit question for rural Americans - how do I kill the 50-100 feral raccoons that run into my yard within 3-5 mins while my small kids play
Armed kids?
The only way to stop 50-100 raccoons that run into your yard is with a good guy with a gun.
This is why we need machine guns. Imagine trying to get all 100 with a semi auto rifle. I think you’d get maybe 10 before you get mobbed by raccoons.
Trenches and barbed wire.
Yeah. Go full Leiningen on them!
Edit: Wow, I never read that Wikipedia page before. That story has 100% more inspiration from Hitler than I was ever taught about in school. They didn’t even tell us the author was German.
Simple, poison the food.
wtf?! I would never poison a child!
Then how do you plan to have room for 100 raccoons?
Raccoons are smart and will learn from the mistakes of their brethren. Perhaps you could encase a neighbor child in Kevlar and have them run around a route of raccoon bait and, uh, humane land mines?
Edit shit I think you were referencing the feral hogs meme. I vaguely remember that from a Jamie Loftus joint
That’s a lot of raccoon poop, and I don’t feel confident that the kind of person who thinks feeding raccoons for decades is a good idea would know that raccoon poop parasites are incurable and will likely kill you.
I had never heard of this before. I do generally avoid contact with wildlife, though.
https://news.uga.edu/deadly-raccoon-roundworm-can-infect-humans-without-symptoms/
Raccoons: “We are no longer asking.”
Now is that better or worse than being raccooned by up to 100 hounds?
I would be happy to be raccooned by up to 100 hounds if they are good boys and girls that want to give kisses and receive belly scratches.
Here is what happened when the police showed up
This is why you don’t feed the wildlife.
Never, ever, EVER feed the Trash Pandas.
Don’t put out food for any wildlife.
Her husband:
Some people just don’t know what to do with swarms of loyal animals…
She missed a grand opportunity to fence off the area, create a raccoon preserve, and charge people to feed them pellets of food she’ll also sell them. Raccoons are adorable, she probably could have gotten enough money to fight the eventual lawsuit after one of’em bites a kid
And I thought the one raccoon we had to get removed from our attic was a problem…
I got jumped by 3 raccoons last year. Got scratched and had to get rabies shots. I leave a fresh duck egg out every night and the raccoons leave me and my trash alone now. I can’t imagine trying to strike a deal with 100 of the fuckers.
