Edit: lotta downvotes from men claiming to be leftists but bury their head in the sand when it’s ever mentioned that violence, especially murder against women, is mostly committed by men. If your solidarity abruptly halts at issues like this and you call yourself a leftists, you’re only kidding yourself and other sexist men.
Thanks for confirming beyond a doubt that Lemmy is just another “leftist” spaced filled with sexist men. Gross and so disappointing.
Most of the replies you’ve received are trying to explain that saying “men” are what is wrong with “people” is a generalisation that is unhelpful and harms all men.
It’s true that the perp is a man, and it’s also true that most violence against women is perpetrated by men. However, that doesn’t mean there’s a causal link between being a man and assaulting women.
It’s much more likely that the addressable causes underlying this “man’s” actions are poverty, lack of mental health support, and cultural norms including but not limited to religion.
When you suggest that “men” are the cause of what happened to this athlete, it’s not surprising that men will be offended. To thereafter frame the obvious response as sexist is projection, frankly.
This is so fucking ignorant, it’s like you’ve never actually spoken to a woman before in your life (and no, the nice lady that delivers your chicken tenders doesn’t count).
When men leave the house, the worst thing we walk around in fear of is ridicule and rejection. Women (rationally) fear for their personal safety. All of the time. You and I cannot even grasp what that must do to a person mentally.
If you even suggest that this isn’t the case, go fuck yourself. I have nothing more to say to you. Some idiotic bullshit doesn’t need more of a platform on the internet than it already has, destroying the minds of young men.
Edit: I fear for the women of this country given the responses I’ve gotten here. Gross.
When men leave the house, the worst thing we walk around in fear of is ridicule and rejection.
Do you live in a cartoon? Seriously, this is complete nonsense. I worry about my personal safety very often, when an environment presents certain risks (e.g., getting robbed, mugged etc.).
It’s true that I don’t generally fear to be sexually assaulted by a woman, but to say that men don’t (need to) worry about their personal safety is completely absurd.
I’m sorry I just don’t feel very unsafe around women. Why should I? The cast majority of violence is committed by men against other men.
I’m a man, and I’m wary of other men, who often attack men over women, or their ego, or their fragile state of mind has been disrupted momentarily or whatever other trivial reason men feel justified attacking people.
Driving in my car = men are more likely to participate in road rage
At work = men are more likely to commit violence at work than women
At home = men are most likely to break and enter occupied homes
In public = men are most likely to be the perpetrator of a public mass shooting public shooting.
I’m a man and I agree with women. Men often react violently when angry, and women simply do not. Whether thats a power thing, and if women were bigger it would flip, but the point is, if you are generally worried about your safety, then you don’t need to worry about women very much at all, and you need to worry about men very much so.
Remember these are generalizations, anyone is capable of anything and women have killed men before and women have committed violence before.
Everything you’ve listed is an absurd over statement.
often attack men over women, or their ego, or their fragile state of mind has been disrupted momentarily or whatever other trivial reason men feel justified attacking people.
This is simply not the reality I live in. I’ve never known someone to attack someone over a woman, nor their fragile state of mind?
Driving in my car = men are more likely to participate in road rage At work = men are more likely to commit violence at work than women At home = men are most likely to break and enter occupied homes In public = men are most likely to be the perpetrator of a public mass shooting public shooting.
I’ve certainly never experienced any of this and while mass shootings and robberies do occur they’re so rare that being a victim of such a crime is not a tangible risk.
Honestly you’re more likely tripping over your shoelace and dying than any of these things actually happening.
You are arguing crime isnt common, I’m arguing that WHEN IT DOES HAPPEN its done by men.
Since this is a conversation about who commits violence most often, it doesnt make sense to appeal to the fact that most people rarely encounter violence.
For the record, I agree, people shouldn’t be worried in general about this stuff. For those that are in situations where they are at risk, they should be careful around men, period.
Are you arguing its stupid for a women to take preventative measures or protect themselves in all cases?
When the dynamic you’re alluding to is done right you have the (typically, not always) woman wanting to be chased as much as the man is chasing. It’s the rider saying “oooh, rollercoaster, you’re so intimidating and scary, toss me around” while the rollercoaster is saying “ooooh, you like curves and airtime don’t you I’ll hold you fast and secure”.
The article mentions a land dispute. Kenya has a murder for land problem.
It takes many forms, including witch hunting - the spread of witch hunting in sub Saharan Africa mostly an excuse for land grabs against the weak. Old man, single women, get targeted by gangs under the guise of witch hunting. It is also fueled by Christian churches vying for power against traditional religion in the region.
Sorry, went off track a bit. But even though it was her ex who did it, it is very likely a land dispute rather than misogyny behind the horrid crime.
It’s insane you’re getting this downvoted. Domestic violence from men against women is a massive global issue, and putting your hands over your ears and saying “ well I’m not the problem” is not doing anything. This problem will never get solved until men take ownership over it and stop it.
Domestic violence is a global issue. But you’re not helping anyone by further pushing a stereotype and ignoring the problem. Do you think only cis men are capable of domestic violence? Because such a though would be bigoted in a few different ways to be honest.
If the statistic were reversed, you’re going to tell me that you wouldn’t care? If 95% of murders were committed by women? You don’t need to answer, I already know.
The reality, though, is if that were ever the case, men would immediately put a stop to it, and it would be no time before women were relegated to baby-making machines with no agency like freaks like Vance want.
If the statistic were reversed, you’re going to tell me that you wouldn’t care?
I’d be calling bullshit still. Sensationalized “stats” for the sake of views on “news”/blogs/podcasts is nothing new and I will not subscribe to it. I’m not sure which fallacies are in play here but I suspect it’s several.
If 95% of murders were committed by women? You don’t need to answer, I already know.
You really don’t.
This is a thread about Rebecca Cheptegei and you bring Vance into this… something 100% unrelated and is frankly, disrespected to the deceased. The problem is, you spend way to much time on the internet/news cycle and now you have a screwed up view of reality. You need to largely disconnect from the internet for a significant period of time
I’m going to bed but there’s countless other studies that show the same trend not just in the USA but in countries across the world. This paper was published in '92 and for those who doubt its legitimacy based on its age, I recommend looking up modern papers on this.
Edit: One last thing before I go to sleep. I’m not making these comments because I want to make men feel bad, or that I think the average guy on Lemmy reading this is a murderer or potential murdered. I’m saying this because as men, we need to cut the bullshit and stop acting like we don’t hear other men casually talk about domestic violence, either “jokingly” or dead serious, or that we don’t see other men engaging in verbal or physical abuse against women. As a POC, I feel pretty much the same way about racism-- I don’t think the average white person is some KKK member but please for the love of god white folks, if you hear someone (especially your friends/family) saying/doing some racist shit, call it out!
Lotta downvotes but no responses to the study I provided. Not at all surprised. Until men are willing to simply acknowledge the existence of this problem, we’ve got a long way to go. Leftists on Lemmy definitely showing their true colors and it’s not surprising, so many leftist spaces get ruined by sexist men who want a safe space where they can discuss racism, transphobia, homophobia but sexism… Nope.
Hundreds of thousands of women are killed each year, poisoned by their doctors. this article is old but nothing has changed. is this misogyny? i thought most doctors these days are women.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25355584/
That’s the article you linked. Do you think directly, physically murdering someone is the same thing as prescribing them drugs that are potentially dangerous?
Not even mentioning that the article has nothing to do with men/women.
To recap, this is what your argument has devolved into: “Yeah, well, this study from over a decade ago says doctors are prescribing too much medication, and I remember hearing once that there are more women doctors than men.”
Really?? That’s what you’ve got? Why are you bending over backwards to not change your mind on this no matter what evidence is provided to you?
See, this is the thing that happens when you defund education for decades, and create a culture where ignorance is celebrated, and critical thinking is shunned… This is the level of “argument” and “discussion” you end up with when they’re adults (big assumption there. Part of my hopes you’re a literal child).
No concept of basic logic, rationality, cogency, etc. It makes it very easy to win arguments like this, but it’s hollow victory, because usually the other person is far too gone (and, again, lacking the ability to think critically or evaluate their own biases) to ever accept that they were wrong. They just double and triple down.
As i said, the problem is ongoing. Were you aware of the extent of lethal poisoning by prescription drugs? did you know that each year doctors kill thousands of women this way and get away with it?
Unfortunately what your asking of people requires personal sacrifice, and people will mentally go all over the place to resist that.
A personal anecdotes is that I’m no longer in contact with my family because I refused to see my racist grandfather on his deathbed and didn’t attend his funeral.
My grandfather was an abusive, literal stereotype of a racist(would say things like “them n-words down the road are fucking up this town”) and a raging alcoholic. The world is better because he’s fucking dead. Now I don’t have a family of origin because I wouldn’t pretend he was a good person.
Men will lose friends and family if they start calling this shit out. It’s hard. You get told to “mind your business” or "it’s just a joke " or get your masculinity questioned. Or the whole “but they’re family” thing. I get why people resist it. No one wants to lose their social support, but often that’s what it comes down to, and they’ll make it feel like you’re the one who’s in the wrong the whole time.
Social pressure is a hell of a thing. I think framing the context around why men don’t call this stuff out will help them recognize why they should.
Not sure what this reference is demonstrating in the context of domestic violence.
That reference says
77% of which involved male victims and 23% female victims
So it is about killing in general not domestic violence
Men kill more and are killed more. This is not a secret and not exactly demonstrating that men are wrong, just that some “industries” (e.g. organised crime) are men only clubs (not sure if this is a demonstration of anything about how good or bad men are).
This is a discussion about a woman who was murdered, so why on earth would you bring up irrelevant stats? There’s a reason why you’re deflecting. Your only contribution to this discussion is a comment telling me to "stfu" because you’d rather deflect than confront sexism. The older I get, the less surprised I am to see not so low-key sexism in leftist spaces. You could have made any kind of comment in this thread and all you decided on was "bUt wHat aBoUT [irrelevant subject]".
It’s so disappointing, frustrating and downright exhausting. I fully expect this kind of rhetoric from conservatives and liberals but it just sucks to hear it in leftist spaces by people who claim to be allies to marginalized people. I honestly think I’m just going to take a break from online spaces like Lemmy and stick to my one community that just happens to be created/lead by a woman. Shit like this is why so many leftist websites and local clubs just turn into a hangout for mostly white guys cluelessly wondering why there’s so little diversity. ✌🏾
Since i was a boy, i enjoyed the public library but i never understood why they always had loads of “romance novels” in a special section that only women frequented. when i was older it occurred to me to take a closer look and i was appalled. all women are disgusting. /s
WTF is wrong with people.
men*
Edit: lotta downvotes from men claiming to be leftists but bury their head in the sand when it’s ever mentioned that violence, especially murder against women, is mostly committed by men. If your solidarity abruptly halts at issues like this and you call yourself a leftists, you’re only kidding yourself and other sexist men.
Thanks for confirming beyond a doubt that Lemmy is just another “leftist” spaced filled with sexist men. Gross and so disappointing.
Most of the replies you’ve received are trying to explain that saying “men” are what is wrong with “people” is a generalisation that is unhelpful and harms all men.
It’s true that the perp is a man, and it’s also true that most violence against women is perpetrated by men. However, that doesn’t mean there’s a causal link between being a man and assaulting women.
It’s much more likely that the addressable causes underlying this “man’s” actions are poverty, lack of mental health support, and cultural norms including but not limited to religion.
When you suggest that “men” are the cause of what happened to this athlete, it’s not surprising that men will be offended. To thereafter frame the obvious response as sexist is projection, frankly.
Nicely put.
Men literally prey after women. When its done right its called, what, lust? Love?
A lot of men are drawn to women as their natural state.
Its not a crazy thing to say that women should be cautious around men in general is it?
Disingenuous at best.
People need to be cautious around people.
The vast majority of men do not “prey” on anything, including women.
This is so fucking ignorant, it’s like you’ve never actually spoken to a woman before in your life (and no, the nice lady that delivers your chicken tenders doesn’t count).
When men leave the house, the worst thing we walk around in fear of is ridicule and rejection. Women (rationally) fear for their personal safety. All of the time. You and I cannot even grasp what that must do to a person mentally.
If you even suggest that this isn’t the case, go fuck yourself. I have nothing more to say to you. Some idiotic bullshit doesn’t need more of a platform on the internet than it already has, destroying the minds of young men.
Edit: I fear for the women of this country given the responses I’ve gotten here. Gross.
Sure mate.
It’s patently absurd to suggest that all women fear for their personal safety “all of the time” when they leave the house.
Sure, there’s a very few places in the world where that may be true, but it certainly is not generally true.
I think your comment says more about you than it does about me.
Speak to a woman. If they let you. Ask them.
It took you 3 days to come up with this witty retort? I’m so disappointed.
Do you live in a cartoon? Seriously, this is complete nonsense. I worry about my personal safety very often, when an environment presents certain risks (e.g., getting robbed, mugged etc.). It’s true that I don’t generally fear to be sexually assaulted by a woman, but to say that men don’t (need to) worry about their personal safety is completely absurd.
You sound like you need to see a doctor then.
Because robberies and mugging do not exist, because I should not worry about them or because they don’t happen to me as a man?
I’m sorry I just don’t feel very unsafe around women. Why should I? The cast majority of violence is committed by men against other men.
I’m a man, and I’m wary of other men, who often attack men over women, or their ego, or their fragile state of mind has been disrupted momentarily or whatever other trivial reason men feel justified attacking people.
Driving in my car = men are more likely to participate in road rage At work = men are more likely to commit violence at work than women At home = men are most likely to break and enter occupied homes In public = men are most likely to be the perpetrator of a public mass shooting public shooting.
I’m a man and I agree with women. Men often react violently when angry, and women simply do not. Whether thats a power thing, and if women were bigger it would flip, but the point is, if you are generally worried about your safety, then you don’t need to worry about women very much at all, and you need to worry about men very much so.
Remember these are generalizations, anyone is capable of anything and women have killed men before and women have committed violence before.
Everything you’ve listed is an absurd over statement.
This is simply not the reality I live in. I’ve never known someone to attack someone over a woman, nor their fragile state of mind?
I’ve certainly never experienced any of this and while mass shootings and robberies do occur they’re so rare that being a victim of such a crime is not a tangible risk.
Honestly you’re more likely tripping over your shoelace and dying than any of these things actually happening.
You are arguing crime isnt common, I’m arguing that WHEN IT DOES HAPPEN its done by men.
Since this is a conversation about who commits violence most often, it doesnt make sense to appeal to the fact that most people rarely encounter violence.
For the record, I agree, people shouldn’t be worried in general about this stuff. For those that are in situations where they are at risk, they should be careful around men, period.
Are you arguing its stupid for a women to take preventative measures or protect themselves in all cases?
I’m arguing that the risk is so minimal that no one bothers mitigating it.
I might get shot today, yet I’m not wearing a ballistics vest.
Ladders. Ladders are the #1 killer. And stupid shit on top of that, like taking something down from a high shelf.
Big femcel vibes. Yikes
When the dynamic you’re alluding to is done right you have the (typically, not always) woman wanting to be chased as much as the man is chasing. It’s the rider saying “oooh, rollercoaster, you’re so intimidating and scary, toss me around” while the rollercoaster is saying “ooooh, you like curves and airtime don’t you I’ll hold you fast and secure”.
The article mentions a land dispute. Kenya has a murder for land problem.
It takes many forms, including witch hunting - the spread of witch hunting in sub Saharan Africa mostly an excuse for land grabs against the weak. Old man, single women, get targeted by gangs under the guise of witch hunting. It is also fueled by Christian churches vying for power against traditional religion in the region.
Sorry, went off track a bit. But even though it was her ex who did it, it is very likely a land dispute rather than misogyny behind the horrid crime.
It’s insane you’re getting this downvoted. Domestic violence from men against women is a massive global issue, and putting your hands over your ears and saying “ well I’m not the problem” is not doing anything. This problem will never get solved until men take ownership over it and stop it.
Domestic violence is a global issue. But you’re not helping anyone by further pushing a stereotype and ignoring the problem. Do you think only cis men are capable of domestic violence? Because such a though would be bigoted in a few different ways to be honest.
Are we talking about what’s possible or what is likely?
Here I’ll answer both:
Bonus: men are far more likely to be a victim of violence than a woman. Men also should be cautious around strange new men!
That stat is entirely reductive and meaningless. And two of your answers are sexist. Not that I think you give a shit.
How? How is a statistic like this meaningless?
If the statistic were reversed, you’re going to tell me that you wouldn’t care? If 95% of murders were committed by women? You don’t need to answer, I already know.
The reality, though, is if that were ever the case, men would immediately put a stop to it, and it would be no time before women were relegated to baby-making machines with no agency like freaks like Vance want.
I’d be calling bullshit still. Sensationalized “stats” for the sake of views on “news”/blogs/podcasts is nothing new and I will not subscribe to it. I’m not sure which fallacies are in play here but I suspect it’s several.
You really don’t.
This is a thread about Rebecca Cheptegei and you bring Vance into this… something 100% unrelated and is frankly, disrespected to the deceased. The problem is, you spend way to much time on the internet/news cycle and now you have a screwed up view of reality. You need to largely disconnect from the internet for a significant period of time
No.
The vast majority of the time a woman is murdered, it’s at the hands of a man. Yes.
I’m going to bed but there’s countless other studies that show the same trend not just in the USA but in countries across the world. This paper was published in '92 and for those who doubt its legitimacy based on its age, I recommend looking up modern papers on this.
Edit: One last thing before I go to sleep. I’m not making these comments because I want to make men feel bad, or that I think the average guy on Lemmy reading this is a murderer or potential murdered. I’m saying this because as men, we need to cut the bullshit and stop acting like we don’t hear other men casually talk about domestic violence, either “jokingly” or dead serious, or that we don’t see other men engaging in verbal or physical abuse against women. As a POC, I feel pretty much the same way about racism-- I don’t think the average white person is some KKK member but please for the love of god white folks, if you hear someone (especially your friends/family) saying/doing some racist shit, call it out!
Lotta downvotes but no responses to the study I provided. Not at all surprised. Until men are willing to simply acknowledge the existence of this problem, we’ve got a long way to go. Leftists on Lemmy definitely showing their true colors and it’s not surprising, so many leftist spaces get ruined by sexist men who want a safe space where they can discuss racism, transphobia, homophobia but sexism… Nope.
Hundreds of thousands of women are killed each year, poisoned by their doctors. this article is old but nothing has changed. is this misogyny? i thought most doctors these days are women. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25355584/
Dude… What?
That’s the article you linked. Do you think directly, physically murdering someone is the same thing as prescribing them drugs that are potentially dangerous?
Not even mentioning that the article has nothing to do with men/women.
To recap, this is what your argument has devolved into: “Yeah, well, this study from over a decade ago says doctors are prescribing too much medication, and I remember hearing once that there are more women doctors than men.”
Really?? That’s what you’ve got? Why are you bending over backwards to not change your mind on this no matter what evidence is provided to you?
See, this is the thing that happens when you defund education for decades, and create a culture where ignorance is celebrated, and critical thinking is shunned… This is the level of “argument” and “discussion” you end up with when they’re adults (big assumption there. Part of my hopes you’re a literal child).
No concept of basic logic, rationality, cogency, etc. It makes it very easy to win arguments like this, but it’s hollow victory, because usually the other person is far too gone (and, again, lacking the ability to think critically or evaluate their own biases) to ever accept that they were wrong. They just double and triple down.
It’s depressing.
As i said, the problem is ongoing. Were you aware of the extent of lethal poisoning by prescription drugs? did you know that each year doctors kill thousands of women this way and get away with it?
Dude, I 100% get what your saying.
Unfortunately what your asking of people requires personal sacrifice, and people will mentally go all over the place to resist that.
A personal anecdotes is that I’m no longer in contact with my family because I refused to see my racist grandfather on his deathbed and didn’t attend his funeral.
My grandfather was an abusive, literal stereotype of a racist(would say things like “them n-words down the road are fucking up this town”) and a raging alcoholic. The world is better because he’s fucking dead. Now I don’t have a family of origin because I wouldn’t pretend he was a good person.
Men will lose friends and family if they start calling this shit out. It’s hard. You get told to “mind your business” or "it’s just a joke " or get your masculinity questioned. Or the whole “but they’re family” thing. I get why people resist it. No one wants to lose their social support, but often that’s what it comes down to, and they’ll make it feel like you’re the one who’s in the wrong the whole time.
Social pressure is a hell of a thing. I think framing the context around why men don’t call this stuff out will help them recognize why they should.
SWING and a MISS
Yeah, it’s because he was a man and not a horrible human. Gotcha.
Why respond in bad faith like this? You’re clearly playing dumb.
Pot, kettle…
Would you please provide data supporting this stance?
Already did in another comment in this thread, take a look. Cited with the link to the paper.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/1635092/ <— by all means, look up similar studies done in more recent years and you’ll find the same fundamental patterns.
Not sure what this reference is demonstrating in the context of domestic violence.
That reference says
So it is about killing in general not domestic violence
Men kill more and are killed more. This is not a secret and not exactly demonstrating that men are wrong, just that some “industries” (e.g. organised crime) are men only clubs (not sure if this is a demonstration of anything about how good or bad men are).
Do you have a reference specific to this topic?
Oh stfu. And we could bring up a million other things that are committed mostly by women and you wouldn’t say a fucking thing.
This is a discussion about a woman who was murdered, so why on earth would you bring up irrelevant stats? There’s a reason why you’re deflecting. Your only contribution to this discussion is a comment telling me to "stfu" because you’d rather deflect than confront sexism. The older I get, the less surprised I am to see not so low-key sexism in leftist spaces. You could have made any kind of comment in this thread and all you decided on was "bUt wHat aBoUT [irrelevant subject]".
It’s so disappointing, frustrating and downright exhausting. I fully expect this kind of rhetoric from conservatives and liberals but it just sucks to hear it in leftist spaces by people who claim to be allies to marginalized people. I honestly think I’m just going to take a break from online spaces like Lemmy and stick to my one community that just happens to be created/lead by a woman. Shit like this is why so many leftist websites and local clubs just turn into a hangout for mostly white guys cluelessly wondering why there’s so little diversity. ✌🏾
All you do is cry and complain into the void instead of empowering yourself and others.
I felt empowered.
Since i was a boy, i enjoyed the public library but i never understood why they always had loads of “romance novels” in a special section that only women frequented. when i was older it occurred to me to take a closer look and i was appalled. all women are disgusting. /s
Really having a hard time addressing the topic at hand, aren’t you?
Check my other comment.
Oh boohoo did those mean men downvote you? Just another reason to mandate isolation of genders.