Hey everyone,
I [28F] need some advice on handling anxiety when job hunting.
Almost a week ago I finished school and I’m once again without work. I’ve been job hunting about 40-50% of my adult life and it has taken a huge toll on my mental health to the point where I’m barely able to apply for jobs anymore. I have gotten a few warnings over the years due to not applying to enough jobs. ( I live in Sweden btw )
I have tried taking breaks.
I have tried waiting for the anxiety to pass.
I have asked so many for advice but it’s like they all give the same default answer. If their advice where enough, I would be a pro at job hunting.
I did get an autism diagnosis a few years back and I do feel better about myself, more confident and understanding of how I work so I think this time around will be different, but it’s like the old anxiety still hangs around and I don’t know how to get rid of it.
Please if you have any advice, I’d love to hear it.
What has worked for me and may or may not help you (also lived in Sweden) is that I write down questions to ask and I go through them multiple times. I also write down questions I think they will ask and then answer them in a very thoughtful way so I can later deliver them in a shorter version but till get a across what I want. I also bring the notebook with me so I can read them at the interview or take notes. Taking notes are great if they have a multiple stages kind of interviews.
Also I put myself in the mind set of “this interview is for me and them to get to know each other and get a feeling if this is for me”. That kinda removes a lot of the stress. I am there for me and my self and here to interview them as much as they are there to interview me. Also many first check the personality, my current job told me later that after the interview they ask everyone “would I like to hang out with this person”. Many good bosses have said “personality can’t or is hard to change and knowledge and experience is something you can easily obtain”.
So you should also try to see if the workplace you try to be hired as is even a nice place for you to be at. I have so far liked small companies the best with 20 to 50 employees.
I have been on the other side of the table to (not in the room but helped my coworkers and asked them questions about the interview afterwards) and a lot of them are just as nervous or unprepared as the one seeking the job.
My dad told me that he thinks like this when he is holding a meeting for higher ups “they all shit in the same bathroom as me today”. I don’t know if that helps but it is kinda the same things as I what I tried to say above. Good luck! :D
God morgon 😊
I often get this feeling that if I don’t get this job I’m gonna end up homeless and die. So it’s practically life or death. Which is not true of course.
I’ve tried the notebook thing before, (it didn’t go well as I didn’t write fast enough) but maybe I should give it a go again! The only times I’ve asked the interviewer questions back have been to requesting companies and they seem to have very little knowledge about the company they work for.
Maybe a part of my job hunting is bad luck? That and just nervousness/anxiety.
That is so true but I have a really hard time relaxing at an interview, I think next time I might ask to have at least part of the interview in another setting than their office. I think the context might make me extra nervous. After my autism diagnosis, I’ve learned I’m probably very understimulated during interviews.
I’ll try to keep this in mind, I’m in a new chapter of my life, and things will be different.
Smaller companies often seem to be more cozy than big ones, I agree.
I got a feeling that you might be a developer so I did check your other comments on Lemmy and saw that you’re working fullstack. I just graduated as a frontend dev at a ‘YH-utbildning’.
Thank you for your insights!
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I do have a LinkedIn account and I already have about 70 contacts, and I try to stay active and comment when I see fit, all to get seen. I also do this thing where I visit the profile of a bunch of people in a company after sending an application in hopes of them seeing the connection, and small things like that.
Academic Work is on my list of websites to update, so I’ll give it some extra time to see if the same support is available. Thanks!
I’m not good at writing and listening at the same time 😅
I’m not in Stockholm unfortunately, I’m in a fairly small place called Arvika in Värmland. I think Oslo is a bit closer than Stockholm haha
I’m open to moving tho, but I’m not sure how to get a decent apartment in or close to Stockholm, I have a partner and two cats so I can’t take just anything
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Thank you! I’ve build my ways over the years to keep track of everything 😅
We have like 3 companies with developers (Tickster is among them, kinda cool) but there are a lot more companies in Karlstad, it’s tiny compared to Stockholm but it’s still a fairly big city. A few years back I counted to around 40 companies of interest.
30min commuting distance isn’t bad at all! How is it to actually get an apartment? I’ve heard there are long waitinglists and you’ll rent in 3rd or event 4th or 5th hand. Sometimes short periods a time jumping from apartment to apartment?
I’m one of those who really like to go to the office, I like to go every day. I feel like I’m going to go crazy if I’m home to much 😆
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ooh I see, I never knew it was easier to buy, and it can’t be hard to sell in such a big city, right? So that won’t be a huge risk.
I should check if I can get a loan for an apartment and how that works.
ooh I see, well if I move to Stockholm or Gothenburg it will probably be pretty fast as it’s for a job unless I can work from home the first month or so. I will look into HSB too, I have a list with housing queues too. I like lists…
Smart to trade apartments! You know a lot about this.
ahaha omg maybe that’s a bit too much even for me! It must be hard to concentrate in that environment!
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