Have you been in a codependent relationship?
My transition has helped me realize just how bad the codependency was in my marriage. Things are really rough for me currently as we try and untangle the destructive habits.
I have never had a sense of identity outside of my relationship with my wife. Now that is changing, it means my marriage must change with it… or not.
finally an acknowledgment of this
ive had to leave quite a few trans or generally lgbt focused communities online because of wild levels of codependence
the intense empathy in these communities can sometimes leave people susceptible to certain sorts of manipulation i feel,
several members of those communities i was in would be so easily manipulated by others, with threats like “do ____ or i will harm myself or i will not take care of myself appropriately”
and these often came from people in genuinely concerning and upsetting situations or histories, but they could use their own trauma to rope other people in and seemingly take them down with them
walking away from these kinds of people despite their threats is incredibly liberating
my last ex did this kind of thing with me when i wanted to assert my boundaries by explaining i did not want to be involved in constant death spirals, and then telling me that me leaving them was killing them and also i was crossing their boundaries by asserting my boundaries (???)