Non-binary seems like it could have several non-compatible meanings, so I wanted to list some of those meanings and see if there are any others out there I don’t know.

One way I could think of non-binary is as being a kind of third gender category, like there are men, women, and non-binary people. In this sense of non-binary a butch woman who considers themselves a woman would not be non-binary because they are a woman.

Sometimes non-binary is used like “genderqueer” is sometimes used, as a generic description of anyone who doesn’t fit perfectly in the narrow confines of the binary genders (i.e. men and women). In this sense a butch woman could see themselves as a woman, but also as genderqueer and non-binary, as they do not conform to binary gender norms for women.

Another way non-binary seems to be used (related to genderqueer in its historical context) is as a political term, an identity taken up by otherwise cis-sexual and even cis-gendered people who wish to resist binary gender norms and policing. In this sense even a femme cis-sexual woman might identify as non-binary. Sometimes this political identity label might come with a gender expression that cuts against the gender expectations for the assigned sex at birth, but it doesn’t have to. (I recently met two people whose gender expressions matched their assigned sex at birth but who identified as non-binary in this political sense.)

I was wondering what other meanings of non-binary are out there, and how they are commonly used.

Note: gatekeeping what is “really” non-binary seems pointless to me, since I agree with Wittgenstein that “language is use”.

I know people get heated about policing what a word means (and I am guilty of this myself), but in the interest of inclusion, pluralism, and general cooperation in our community I think we can find a way to communicate with overlapping and different meanings of a shared term.

  • Crackhappy@lemmy.worldEnglish
    16·
    8 months ago

    Perhaps it’s too simple, but I thought non binary people just don’t ascribe to the idea that there is only a binary state of gender.

    • dandelionOPEnglish
      3·
      8 months ago

      Ah interesting, I think that might be like the political meaning of non-binary, someone who rejects the gender binary, but maybe for other reasons besides political reasons? The only reason I can think of is maybe someone just doesn’t believe anyone can be binary, like that there is some kind of empirical fact of people’s gender identities and none of them are binary.

        • dandelionOPEnglish
          5·
          8 months ago

          That’s a good rule of thumb, to accept people how they identify. Even in examples where we suspect someone is not the identity they claim, it seems disrespectful and unhelpful to argue with them about it. An example that comes to my mind is the Twitch streamer Finnster who was often thought to be an egg by the trans community. There was lots of doubt of his identity as a cis man and even when they came out as genderqueer and started HRT, I still think it was right to respect Finn’s cis-man identity before they changed their identity and decided to start HRT. It’s just an issue of respect.

          EDIT: Have you read Plato’s Euthyphro? I was trying to think of how to describe my affliction, why I’m thinking about this stuff. Socrates came to mind. 😅