• peanuts4life
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    12 hours ago

    I hate that this is satire but also pretty much true. Men are not generally socialized to recognize uncomplicated, unsexual fondness for a woman.

    • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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      11 hours ago

      I’m not sure I’m even capable of not wanting to sleep with a woman that I get along well with. Like, I don’t ACT on those feelings so as not to fuck up good friendship but they are there.

      • peanuts4life
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        7 hours ago

        Thanks for sharing. I definitely find people far more attractive once I get to know them than as strangers.

      • Zetta@mander.xyz
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        9 hours ago

        It’s okay to feel like that, you just need to be in control of your actions and in your case you are! So good job

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      8 hours ago

      The thing about socialization is that it’s ongoing throughout life. A guy having male friends who can tell him “idk bro sounds like platonic affection” can help him learn even as an adult

      • peanuts4life
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        7 hours ago

        I very much agree. I had to be told this, myself, before I really understood that I’d allowed a toxic sort of personality trait to cultivate.

    • MothmanDelorian@lemmy.world
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      8 hours ago

      On the flipside it was very difficult as a nerdy nice guy to get some women to understand that when I said lets do x I really meant as friends because not everyone is actually sexually interested in you. Sometimes I just wanted to see a movie with someone I thought was a friend

      • peanuts4life
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        7 hours ago

        Yeah! It’s an intersectional, social issue. I’ve had just a couple woman adamantly insist to me that men could not be friends with women, in a completely platonic way.

        I think they are wrong, in an absolute sense, but in popular Western society, they are right 8 times out of 10.

    • Overshoot2648@lemm.ee
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      8 hours ago

      Eh, I’m just aplatonic. I don’t get anything from friendship and I generally don’t understand it. It makes it very difficult to date.

      • peanuts4life
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        6 hours ago

        Do you mean aplotinic with promising sexual partners (presumably women)? or, are you generally aplotinic, as in you lack interest in friendships with anyone?