• Rentlar@lemmy.ca
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    10 months ago

    That one circular chain of people who seemed mostly to agree of having either two gfs or two bfs and never crossing another person in the chain…

    • mozz@mbin.grits.dev
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      10 months ago

      I kept looking at that too. It’s crazy to me that there are only 2 cycles in the graph and one is the big accidental one. It honestly makes me think that either something must be wrong with the data, or it’s reflective of some deep principle of math or sexuality (e.g. that people won’t fuck around within their close social grouping nearly as readily as they will with people on the outskirts of it).

      • Knedliky@discuss.tchncs.de
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        10 months ago

        The authors wrote that they were surprised too and went back to talk to the students and apparently there was an unwritten rule that you don’t date the ex of the new partner of your ex. So if Bob and Alice split up and Alice starts dating Ben, then Bob should not date Ben’s ex Alison.

      • Liz@midwest.social
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        10 months ago

        I’ve spotted five cycles.

        1. The big boy.
        2. Six member cycle at the top of the big boy.
        3. Four member cycle with that guy who slept with nine girls.
        4. A second cycle with that same guy.
        5. That three way over to the right.

        It’s possible there’s more but I’m pretty sure that’s it.

      • Jimbob0i0@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Also feels weird there’s only one same gender connection (female to female) as far as I could see in that whole thing…

  • Schmoo@slrpnk.net
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    10 months ago

    There are 6 people who’ve had gay sex that I could find and all but one of them are bi (or at least bi-curious). That seems like a statistical anomaly.

    • antonim@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      10 months ago

      It’s a 90s high school, somewhat rural and religious, according to the article. Either there really were few homosexual relationships there, or the students didn’t want to reveal them.

    • flying_sheep@lemmy.ml
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      10 months ago

      You think?

      I think people feel liberated to say they’re gay these days, so there are much more people claiming to be gay than in previous decades. On the other hand, there’s still a lot of homophobes and also quite some biphobes around, so there’s probably a lot of bi people that present as hetero or even gay.

      I’d assume that most people are at least a little bi, and that they’ll try that out in high school even if they later decide they won’t pursue it.

      • jjjalljs@ttrpg.network
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        10 months ago

        Not long ago I saw a woman’s profile on tinder in NYC that said “No bi men”. I guess it’s good that she put her phobia right out front like that.

        • jak@sopuli.xyz
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          10 months ago

          I’m a 90s kid, with a stepsister the same age (who grew up in a Massachusetts college town, at that). When I was in college, I dropped my then boyfriend’s ex’s name in a conversation with my dad and stepsister (he was out already and didn’t make a secret of anything, he was cool with it, I swear). My stepsister asked all shocked if I knew he was bi when we started dating and then explained that she’d never date a bi guy, because she could never “be sure”. My dad made a boomery joke and said something noncommittally biphobic.

          I’m so grateful I had that conversation before I came out to my family. I’m bi and an afab egg. I just married a bi man, and I told him pretty early on that I don’t know what the situation with my gender is yet. His response was “that’s why we date bi people, we like all the situations,” which had never occurred to me (sometimes I’m dumb), but it was a perfect level of humor and acceptance for the moment.

          I’m sorry, this was a super long and mostly irrelevant comment. I intended to agree that biphobia is present in the people and places you’d least expect, even when straight up homophobia isn’t (stepsister was a member of the gsa and loved pride parades)

          • nixcamic@lemmy.world
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            10 months ago

            afab egg

            I know what both of these words mean separately, but together I’m lost. Was egg a typo?

            • jak@sopuli.xyz
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              10 months ago

              I’m like 90% sure I’m a trans dude, but I’m not quite there yet (I’m immigrating and in grad school and just don’t have the time or security rn to do a deep self analysis, plus I think I’d be a much less attractive man. I know that’s less important for men, but it feels like I’d be shooting myself in the foot. Also, my husband loves how I smell and taking hormones might change it to something he didn’t like as much, which I would hate). Therefore, I haven’t hatched yet.

              Egg just basically means “pre-trans”

              https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/egg_irl

              /c/egg_irl for examples

      • Revonult@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        He is not saying anything about it being weird there are gay or bisexual relationships. Just that every instance of a homosexual relationship is also bisexual.

        Like its interesting there are no purely homosexual relationships as you would expect from an accurate sampling

        • flying_sheep@lemmy.ml
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          10 months ago

          You misunderstood:

          • I didn’t imply that he is homophobic or biphobic
          • I think it’s possible that this is a more accurate sampling, as I think that bi people are underrepresented in common statistics.
          • Schmoo@slrpnk.net
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            10 months ago

            That’s why this was interesting to me. I myself am bi and that has not been my experience. Most gay men I encounter are fully gay, and I’ve only ever met 2 other bi people in my life.

            • flying_sheep@lemmy.ml
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              10 months ago

              Are they fully gay, or did they embrace the acceptance of a biphobic culture by leaning into their gay side?

              I’m not devaluing their choices, I’m just saying that people sometimes shut doors out of choice, not because there’s no world in which they’d take them.

    • essteeyou@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      They’d have to lie about who they slept with, and I expect the other person might have something to say about that if it was not true.

      I wonder if they verified each claim from both sides.

      Edit: it’s a scientific paper, so there’s no need to wonder!

      In fig. 2, and in all discussions presented here, all romantic and sexual relationship nominations linking students are included, whether or not the nomination from i to j was reciprocated with a nomination from j to i.

      • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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        10 months ago

        whether or not the nomination from i to j was reciprocated with a nomination from j to i.

        Oh, so there was no bullshit filter

        • rimjob_rainer@discuss.tchncs.de
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          10 months ago

          Then it’s certainly mostly bullshit. Male students tend to massively exaggerate when they tell stories about how many sexual relationships they had. Source: I was a male student.

      • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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        10 months ago

        These aren’t all sexual relationships. So if someone says “I had a crush on X”, maybe there would be a line. Even if X did not have a crush back. Maybe one date is enough for a line.

  • EfreetSK@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    This is actually very interresting. I always found it hard to understand how some people can have so many sexual partners, and then there are people with very few of sexual partners. I had this theory that there must be some subculture of people who are really into this, date eachother in this group which causes their number to increase abnormally. It was just a silly theory but this sort of supports it?

    • ricecake@sh.itjust.works
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      10 months ago

      If you look at this a little closer, you’ll notice that there aren’t actually that many highly connected nodes.
      The big structure is mostly composed of single link chains.

      • EfreetSK@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Hmm you’re right, I thought the big circle was more interconnected. Actually it’s a bit weird that there are basically no crossing lines

        • ricecake@sh.itjust.works
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          10 months ago

          Elsewhere it was mentioned that the researchers were also surprised by that, and did followup interviews that revealed that it was against social rules to date your exes partners ex. Basically two couples can’t “swap” partners. I thought it was interesting that you didn’t see that, but you do see a few triangles.

      • petersr@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        And that’s even more interesting. As someone who was not part of any of the graph in high school / college, how would a big link of chains play out in real time?

        Like “The Mary and Tom met at a party. Next week Tom stumbled into Lucy by the lockers…”

        I find it hard to imagine.

  • essteeyou@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    I’m surprised to see that a few people have had 5 or 6 sexual partners while in high school.

    Edit: missed the guy with 9!

    • jak@sopuli.xyz
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      10 months ago

      Sexual or romantic partners.

      I “dated” a classmate for a month at 14 until he wanted me to sit on his lap and I broke up with him because I felt like I’d be too heavy but didn’t want to admit that, so I didn’t know how to talk to him about it.

      If you’d asked me at 14, if he was a romantic partner, on god I’d have said yes.

    • Wolf_359@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Is it that odd?

      I had 5 or 6, and if you count kissing a lot more. By now I’ve had several more and if you count kissing I’ve completely lost count.

      For reference, I’m not particularly attractive and I’m right on the border of normie but not quite. I think my weird friends think I’m a normie and my normie friends think I’m a nerd.

      There were guys I went to high school with who had far, far more sex than I ever did. More than I was even interested in because they’d sleep with just about anyone who was willing at any party.

      By 12th grade, some of the “cool kids” I went to school with probably had 10-15+ sexual partners under their belt.

      • essteeyou@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        I left school at 16 with exactly one person to put on a graph like this.

        My first two relationships were like 5 years long in total. After the second break-up things accelerated a lot, but in school I think my situation was pretty standard.

  • Fleur__@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    Why are there 2 horizontal parallel lines instead of just one with a 2 bellow it?

  • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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    10 months ago

    People in the comments straight out believing all of it are sex relationships… Read the paper, or at least the headline.