A month ago I found out that my (30’s ftm) live-in boyfriend of 3 years (30’s m) was sexting with various guys and making plans to meet up. We fought, made up, and got into therapy. Things are slowly healing.
Today I found out that an old friend of his that he used to sext with before our relationship still sends him nudes regularly on snapchat. I found out because my bf had saved a bunch of them. My bf says that he never responds to them and so he didn’t think it was an issue. I disagree - If anyone I knew irl ever sent me nudes I would immediately delete it, ask them not to send more, and tell my bf about it.
My question is, was his lack of action yet another instance of cheating?
I can understand his mistakes unless you’ve already discussed what monogamy means to you. That said I definitely do think that his behavior stretches the boundaries of what I’d assume monogamous people will be ok with.
But beyond that. Do you think you’ll both stay comfortable with the boundaries you have? It sounds like he’s not committed to monogamy and isn’t going to put in the effort to communicate about it.