I’m over 30 and I’m pretty fuckin’ miserable, too!
But I guess I was actually paying attention to how fucked things have been politically since I was able to start voting pushing nearly 30 years ago now.
In regards to the actual article:
The researchers say they were able to pick up on the distrust by asking whether or not people believed someone would return a lost wallet. Compared to the Nordic countries, people in the U.S. were more likely to underestimate the kindness of others.
“It requires that strangers are to be trusted, that they will go beyond the call of duty and be kind and try and get it back to the rightful owner, or drop it with the police, which means you need to trust the police,” De Neve says. “That single item of the wallet drop is very powerful.”
There’s literally, literally a flip side to this “lost wallet” equation in the US as well. Have you ever been the person who was kind enough to return a lost wallet? Have you also ever been the person who was accused by the person you returned it to of stealing a bunch of things (like cash) out of the wallet? It’s actually a fairly common occurence in the the US. So not only is there distrust in whether or not others will return a wallet, there is a valid distrust by people who find lost wallets that the wallet owner won’t lie about the original contents of the wallet and accuse them of theft anyway. At what point does it just become pointless to bother with returning a wallet at all if you’re going to be accused of a crime because you did the right thing?
This lack of trust is literally the main goal of mass media, especially right wing media. When everyone else is your enemy, you won’t work together with them for your own benefit. Instead, you’ll trust the strongman to keep you safe from all the fake danger.
Social media accelerated this by an incredible amount. Today’s America feels like a completely different society from the one I grew up in the 90s.
The only time I found a wallet I returned it to the owner. The owner was suspicious as fuck towards me and treated me like I had stolen it even though everything was still in it. I literally picked it up off the ground, looked at the drivers license, and headed inside the store to see if they could page him and ran into him on the way in. The people I told about it were all pissed towards me for actually returning it and not just stealing the money… It was basically unanimous that I was wrong for doing this and some of these people were friends I thought were good people up until that point. It really fucked up my faith in other people. Next time I’ll just leave it be.
There was a time when I was a student that I spent a lot of time near a particular coffee shop, and more than you would typically expect for just studying and the like, since it turned into the place where my friend group basically hung out most of the time.
In any case, it was a decently high traffic area and since I was there a lot I found two wallets and a cellphone over the time I was there a lot.
One wallet had an emergency contact I was able to call, think it was their mother, and that I’d be at the coffee shop for a bit. They brought me cookies, and I was thrilled.
Next person just had their phone number, and they acted like I was a creep for saying I had their wallet and would like to give it back to them, so I told them I was leaving it with the cashier and left it at that and was a bit sad, since being told off for trying to be nice is a bummer.
Cellphone was the worst. I called their most recent number and told them what was up (this was clearly before ubiquitous lock screens). Owner called me back in the same number and threatened to call the cops on me so I hung up, powered off the phone and put it back where I found it. Felt sad.
Given how it seems like everyone has lost their minds now, I’m not sure I would risk letting someone know I found their stuff. I’d still try to return it because that’s the right thing to do, but I’m not sure if I’d be willing to use my own phone number or anything.
If people will shoot you for using their driveway to turn around I can only imagine what they’d do for a bus pass, student ID and a loyalty punch card for a bakery.
Have you ever been the person who was kind enough to return a lost wallet? Have you also ever been the person who was accused by the person you returned it to of stealing a bunch of things (like cash) out of the wallet?
You’re saying something. I’ve heard first hand stories about angry wallet owners “shooting the messanger” so to speak. I’m from Germany but the saying “No good deed goes unpunished” rings true in most parts of the world, I think. That’s why you throw a lost wallet into the next letter box and don’t bother any further. At least that’s what you’re supposed to do where I’m from and I doubt any of those wallets ever arrived with their full content but that’s not my problem.
Some years back i was leaving the gym (I live in the US by the by) and I found a debit card. Now the only identifying info on it was the bank associated and the name and such. I wasnt going to take it home and try and track down the person who owned it. So I took it to the associated bank, grabbed a deposit slip and wrote a note on it and dropped in the deposit box. I assume it was returned, but I honestly don’t know. Felt this was the best approach given the circumstances.
I’m over 30 and I’m pretty fuckin’ miserable, too!
But I guess I was actually paying attention to how fucked things have been politically since I was able to start voting pushing nearly 30 years ago now.
In regards to the actual article:
There’s literally, literally a flip side to this “lost wallet” equation in the US as well. Have you ever been the person who was kind enough to return a lost wallet? Have you also ever been the person who was accused by the person you returned it to of stealing a bunch of things (like cash) out of the wallet? It’s actually a fairly common occurence in the the US. So not only is there distrust in whether or not others will return a wallet, there is a valid distrust by people who find lost wallets that the wallet owner won’t lie about the original contents of the wallet and accuse them of theft anyway. At what point does it just become pointless to bother with returning a wallet at all if you’re going to be accused of a crime because you did the right thing?
Apologies for (slight retch) a reddit link:
https://old.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1j1yqt9/found_a_wallet_with_200_and_i_returned_it_to_its/
Bottom line: The US is filled with selfish untrustworthy fucking maniacs.
This lack of trust is literally the main goal of mass media, especially right wing media. When everyone else is your enemy, you won’t work together with them for your own benefit. Instead, you’ll trust the strongman to keep you safe from all the fake danger.
Social media accelerated this by an incredible amount. Today’s America feels like a completely different society from the one I grew up in the 90s.
The only time I found a wallet I returned it to the owner. The owner was suspicious as fuck towards me and treated me like I had stolen it even though everything was still in it. I literally picked it up off the ground, looked at the drivers license, and headed inside the store to see if they could page him and ran into him on the way in. The people I told about it were all pissed towards me for actually returning it and not just stealing the money… It was basically unanimous that I was wrong for doing this and some of these people were friends I thought were good people up until that point. It really fucked up my faith in other people. Next time I’ll just leave it be.
There was a time when I was a student that I spent a lot of time near a particular coffee shop, and more than you would typically expect for just studying and the like, since it turned into the place where my friend group basically hung out most of the time.
In any case, it was a decently high traffic area and since I was there a lot I found two wallets and a cellphone over the time I was there a lot.
One wallet had an emergency contact I was able to call, think it was their mother, and that I’d be at the coffee shop for a bit. They brought me cookies, and I was thrilled.
Next person just had their phone number, and they acted like I was a creep for saying I had their wallet and would like to give it back to them, so I told them I was leaving it with the cashier and left it at that and was a bit sad, since being told off for trying to be nice is a bummer.
Cellphone was the worst. I called their most recent number and told them what was up (this was clearly before ubiquitous lock screens). Owner called me back in the same number and threatened to call the cops on me so I hung up, powered off the phone and put it back where I found it. Felt sad.
Given how it seems like everyone has lost their minds now, I’m not sure I would risk letting someone know I found their stuff. I’d still try to return it because that’s the right thing to do, but I’m not sure if I’d be willing to use my own phone number or anything.
If people will shoot you for using their driveway to turn around I can only imagine what they’d do for a bus pass, student ID and a loyalty punch card for a bakery.
You seem like a good person and I’m sorry those assholes treated you like that.
You’re saying something. I’ve heard first hand stories about angry wallet owners “shooting the messanger” so to speak. I’m from Germany but the saying “No good deed goes unpunished” rings true in most parts of the world, I think. That’s why you throw a lost wallet into the next letter box and don’t bother any further. At least that’s what you’re supposed to do where I’m from and I doubt any of those wallets ever arrived with their full content but that’s not my problem.
Some years back i was leaving the gym (I live in the US by the by) and I found a debit card. Now the only identifying info on it was the bank associated and the name and such. I wasnt going to take it home and try and track down the person who owned it. So I took it to the associated bank, grabbed a deposit slip and wrote a note on it and dropped in the deposit box. I assume it was returned, but I honestly don’t know. Felt this was the best approach given the circumstances.
And the part with dropping a found wallet with the police. We all know they’re going to do fuck all to find the owner.
On that topic, Japan is 100% reliable for returning a dropped wallet.
https://youtu.be/Qxo-_6S1AoE