Not like, casual “Hi, how are you?” but seriously, how are you? Are you sleeping okay, is everything in your personal life going all right? And if not, can Internet strangers do anything to help?
I am quite unwell for the most part. I spend most of my time alone. I’m either at home playing games in a filthy room (because I never have the energy to clean it) or I’m at the low-paying job I hate surrounded by people I’m either indifferent to or despise. As for a personal life, that’s about it. The only person I’m close to is my sister and we don’t even want to talk to eachother at least fifty percent of the time. I’m in my mid-twenties, can’t drive, and I live with my parents who I believe would have kicked me out if they didn’t feel sorry for me. Mental illness runs in my family so I don’t bother talking to them about it because they’re all dealing with their own shit. I feel no excitment for anything. I spend most of my time bored and alone which I hate to admit. I know it’s not, but it feels almost shameful. I’m not going to jump off anything in case anyone is worried, I just wanted to take this opportunity to vent.
Living on public housing only with food stamps and little money from my aging mother, can’t afford anything, barley can eat, disabled and can’t work although been applying everywhere but disabilities means I’m disabled. But government says I don’t exist, wants to take the little things I have away like food and shelter, government says I can work because I can checks notes “fold laundry” and “work a telephone switchboard”.
Been like this for the last 10 years battling every day to just exist
Oh and don’t forget the government internment camps that I probably will be forcefully joining next couple years because I’m different
Every day hearing stuff about Trump is eating away at me. I remember four years ago. Depression settled in. I’m afraid for the next four years of this. It’s only been like 5 weeks.
I envy the blissful ignorance of teenage me. I didn’t understand much of what was going on during the last presidency of mr. orange. I hope you and me find some way of coping. I fear it will be a long 4 years. Maybe I’m wrong, I’d love to be wrong.
That “No” buttons looks sexier every night.
I feel that, just gotta keep on keeping on though. Even if today sucks, tomorrow could be better, and you can only hit the no button once.
It’s a real sexy no button though.
From my experience life is a ball rolling down a hill. It never gets higher than the day before and if it hits the bottom you die.
Your birth decides the starting height and your effort decides the slope.
I started somewhere in the lower middle and put zero effort into life. Now I’m not even half way past others but I’m already near the bottom.
Let’s say I’m not exactly expecting a natural end to my life at this stage.
This is my life story. Every day, I understand more and get closer to “old man lives alone with his dog in the woods”
Yeah, except I can’t afford a dog or woods.
Pretty good! Doing things that feel meaningful and interesting. Able to follow global politics and read in ways that couldn’t 3 years ago due to work stress. Life situation is excellent. I feel very lucky, and trying to use that to make myself useful.
I’m okay as long as I don’t doom scroll too much.
I’m Canadian and middle aged. I was braced for a rough Trump 2.0, but the last month has truly exceeded expectations for suck. Our country is under economic attack by our biggest trading partner. Human rights and trying to help and support each other are suddenly considered bad things. Our window to address climate change is snapping shut as our leaders around the world move in the wrong direction. I’m feeling really good about my decision to not have kids at least.
On the plus side, my sick cat is responding to treatment, and my partner and I have just set up a nursery - we’re going to start fostering wee kiddos whose families are going through rough spots. I’ve got some financial flexibility so I’m treating myself to a stack of coffee gift cards each week that I hand out to folks who look like they could use it. Sorta makes my day to be able to make sure someone unhoused gets a warm drink and some food.
Politics is absolutely a mess right now, part of the impetus for this thread lol
I’m so glad your kitty is responding to treatment! It’s so scary when they’re sick, I hope they get better soon.
I love the coffee card idea! When I have some extra cash at the end of a paycheck I might steal that.
Silver lining, the disaster down South and the threats being hurled is waking people up to sloganeering populism.
Expect a lot of fearful people who are expecting their medicaid to get cut and lose access to healthcare.
As someone with cancer, that’s what I’m going through.
Not much can be done. The suffering is the point. The majority will not stand up for people like me.
I’m definitely expecting a lot of fear, I know I’m pretty terrified myself.
I’m so sorry, you just shouldn’t have to worry about your healthcare being dropped randomly, especially not in the middle of treating something. I hate that I can’t make your situation any better, I’m just sorry you’re facing that.
I’m in the USA, I’ve been seeing this harrowing bullshit for a long time. Long before it affected me personally. I’ve been angry about it for a long time. Nothing changes, everything gets worse. I’m just a statistic. It is what it is.
Thank you for the kindness, however. The kindness does matter.
I feel like deflated Squidward every day.
Stressed about finances, I splurged on a few things that were not essential, but were wanted for varying reasons, some sentimental, some out of sheer practicality in that treating myself is a good thing every once in a while. Now my budgets blown for at least a month or so until I can rebuild the savings I dipped into.
It’s a mix. The heating is out on my apartment, so it’s currently 55 degrees in here, and i have no clue when the furnace will be fixed. My kitties don’t seem to mind, but it’s definitely feeling frigid. On the plus side, i sign a lease for a new apartment walking distance from my job on Friday, so won’t be a problem for long. I had to get an advance on my pay, but it will be worth it to be able to walk to work everyday. Financially i am fucked, but that’s been no different for the past year, so I’ll just have to accept that
I am doing better as I realize a lot of things are out of my hands.
I voted, show up to protests when I can, boycott the companies at Trump’s inauguration.
So I joined a gym to go to classes to force myself out of the house and trying to read more to deprogram the effects of social media on my attention span.
But overall im exhausted and have this underlying worry of what dreams I’ve been having lately. I don’t believe that much in messages received in dreams but I’ve had some trippy moments lately.
I don’t make fast enough progress with what I’m currently doing in my job (VM images with distrobuilder and cloud-init to call ansible-pull, if you’re into that kind of masochist thing), I get too little sleep because my body insists in waking me up 1h early every day, my 4yo sleeps in bed with my wife instead of me and I miss her terribly, and though we do make good money, it’s still kind of tight.
OTOH, we’re having a spontaneous long weekend getaway with my brother’s family and for friends in a mountain cottage coming up that we’re all really looking forward to, so there’s that. There will be multiple dogs, we’re gonna light a fire and make bread on sticks and marshmallows, and we’ll have a wonderful view over Saxon Switzerland.
But at least equally important: how are you?
Too little sleep is rough, I was up at midnight tonight so that really resonates with me right now lol. Maybe the kid’ll get comfortable sleeping alone soon so you can get your bed back?
Long weekend, multiple dogs, and nice views though? That sounds fantastic, I hope you enjoy it!
Edit oops: I’m doing okay, actually! I’ve been getting treated for depression and it seems to be working, I’ve been having an easier time kinda dealing with life despite the whole everything.
I also totally have a concert coming up, I’m gonna see my favorite band (Delain) next month and my husband’s gonna gonna drive me so I don’t have to park or stay sober or anything, I’m looking forward to it :D
despite the whole everything
Oh shit, I forgot about the whole everything! We’ve had elections here in Germany and it’s going as you would expect, with fascists making massive gains everywhere, and them there’s the US and the environment and the war in Ukraine (which is not very far away from here), well, the whole everything. We even have a German word for it: Gesamtscheiße (roughly translates to “the overall shit”)
You can and should be very proud for getting help for your depression. Good job on surviving, I’m glad to hear that therapy is working. From what I understand, it’s a never ending fight against an enemy that gets stronger while you blink, so don’t give up. Have a meme:
Have fun with Delian!
I’m thankful to be alive, did my oil change in my car today, my new ramps that were supposed to be good for 10k lbs snapped as I was driving off them with my 3k lbs Malibu. Least I was behind the wheel and not under the car.
Amazon didn’t even bother having me return them, they were like “oh shit OK yea going to skip offering a replacement and sending the old ones back, here’s your money back”.
Other than that though, feeling accomplished, I haven’t been doom-scrolling as much lately and I’ve started straying away from more political posting’s because I found that there isn’t much I could do regarding everything and it was starting to dampen the mood.
Looking at the brighter things in life I have found helps tremendously in keeping positivity alive.
Please, please keep safety first when working with these heavy vehicles. And don’t cheap out when your life is on the line (jacks, ramps, brakes, steering components, …)
I looked at the reviews and black widow was supposed to be an amazing brand, it was 60 bucks but like every review was five stars, but yeah needless to say I don’t plan on buying them again
Ooh, that sounds like it could have been scary! Glad you’re okay.
Avoiding doom scrolling is probably good, I could stand to take a page out of your book lol
Besides worrying that my country might be invaded by the US in the not so distant future, I’m doing good! 😃 I’ve got everything I need and my health is good. I’ve got some slight art block going on at the moment, so I’m mostly playing videogames in my free time which usually tends to inspire me haha.
can Internet strangers do anything to help?
Thank you for asking, sincerely, but if Internet strangers tear into me for just having my comments have licensing footer text, there’s no way I’m going to start stating any of my real issues that I’m dealing with, for them to judge.
real issues
Really not trying to be rude, but it’s like going out dressed up like a clown, and then wondering why no one takes you seriously.
The person dressed as a clown could still have cancer, but people aren’t gonna ask about your health because you’re dressed like a clown. Perception sets expectations.
To a lot of us, the licensing text is silly and superfluous, sorry. The courts the world over prioritize corporations over individuals and if you try to sue an AI company for scraping your comments… no offense but you’ll probably lose unless you’re a secret billionaire. That’s why it’s silly and superfluous, because the likelihood of you actually being able to protect them as intellectual property is near zero.
You literally put it in every comment, and thus, people look at you like you’re dressed like a clown.
You’re defeatist attitude, and being so readily willing to give up your rights and protections, is disturbing to see.
Metaphorically speaking, you don’t have to suck corporate penis automatically. It’s okay to push back, even if you fail, at least you can look at yourself in the mirror the next morning.
Believe more in yourself, and of those other citizens around you. Don’t give in to the despair.
It’s not a defeatist attitude, it’s that we have fundamentally different views on copyright and intellectual property rights.
I didn’t want to get into that part because why argue when we’re clearly on different pages, but since you want to call it defeatist and telling me I’m sucking corporate dick instead of wondering why I feel differently, I guess I’ll give it a go.
Plagiarism is necessary. Progress implies it. It embraces an author’s phrase, makes use of his expressions, erases a false idea, and replaces it with the right idea.
-Guy Debord, Society of the Spectacle, 1968
I was influenced in my thought on this kind of stuff by people like Debord and Mark Hosler from Negativland.
To mangle a quote from Hosler from a video I haven’t been able to find online in almost 20 years:
“If you want to have control over your art: Keep it to yourself. Keep it in your home. Don’t show it to people.”
As Dawkins theorized with memetics, when an idea is accepted into a new mind, the idea propagates and changes as it moves between people. Once that idea has been ingested by someone else’s mind, you can’t take it out of their mind again. They are already generating new ideas based on the meme of your art, thought, ideas. Copying each other is literally just how human communication works, and all this work to lay claim over it is at the very best superfluous and at the very worst a gross instinct of domination and control as opposed to sharing.
Creative Commons doesn’t even offer the license that Negativland helped develop anymore.
Am I giving up my rights or am I living in the actual real world of how real human communication actually works? If I wanted control over these ideas, I wouldn’t bother sharing them.
So the TL;DR of your reply is, that it’s okay to plagerise, that Humanity needs Corporations to do so to thrive. Gotcha.
For the record, and to repeat myself again, my license allows open-source/nonprofit usage of my comments by Humanity to train their LLMs.
Thanks for the purposeful misreading and at no point making an attempt to engage with a different set of ideas. We’re done here and I will be shitting on you and your stupid fucking license vociferously from here on out because you’re an arrogant egotistical asshole.
Thanks for the purposeful misreading and at no point making an attempt to engage with a different set of ideas.
Hard disagree. And I stand by what I’ve said.
We’re done here and I will be shitting on you and your stupid fucking license vociferously from here on out because you’re an arrogant egotistical asshole.
It would probably be easier (and more mature) to just use the block functionality, but you do you, I guess. 🤷♂️
You can hard disagree all you want, you literally dismissed the ideas without even considering them, but sure, you do you too, buddy.
Your footer rules, don’t let them haters win!
Second
I want to steal that footer
I want to steal that footer
Here you go…
[~This~ ~comment~ ~is~ ~licensed~ ~under~ ~CC~ ~BY-NC-SA~ ~4.0~](https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/4.0/legalcode.en)
Your footer rules, don’t let them haters win!
Thanks, I appreciate the support. And don’t worry I won’t. This isn’t my first rodeo with those who don’t like it. I just wish there was more moderation on Lemmy to combat it, so I can spend more time just interacting with others on posts content itself.
My point was just to say that while I’m sure there’s good and decent human beings who may disagree but be able to debate issues online with each other, there’s a whole other bunch that would rather just see things burn, if it doesn’t line up exactly to their personal belief system, and that makes it problematic for someone to expose their inner issues to everyone else, even when they desperately need their help.
And that’s before throwing in conflict AI bots, and astroturfers trying to generate activity, that just pollutes the waters even more.
it doesn’t do anything though lol
Safe Harbor laws say otherwise. And Law trump ToS.
And I do believe that licenses will be enforced at some point, right now we’re still in the Wild Wild West portion of things. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to lay down my markers now.
Also, I specifically want to make sure my comments are available for training for open source projects, which is what the license does.
People focus so much on “but it’s not enforceable” and “you don’t own what you say on the Internet” that they forget it’s a statement of intention.
You’re sharing your support, however nominal, for good causes. I see nothing wrong with that ¯\(ツ)/¯
People used to put goofy-ass sign-offs on comments back in forum days; a couple extra lines of text that don’t hurt anybody shouldn’t be an issue.
You keep doing you, comrade. /gen /pos
People focus so much on “but it’s not enforceable” and “you don’t own what you say on the Internet” that they forget it’s a statement of intention.
My inner tinfoil hat persona thinks its just corporate bots/astroturfers trying to shape the narratived away from every adding a license to their comments, as it truly does hold legal power.
Regular people either agree to different degress, or think its harmless and don’t care. Its only a few that REALLY REALLY REALLY get bent out of shape about it, for strange reasons (which goes back to fueling my inner tinfoil hat persona).
You’re sharing your support, however nominal, for good causes. I see nothing wrong with that ¯(ツ)/¯
Exactly, or moreso, additionally. My license allows for open-source/non-profit usage of my content, giving back to everybody else.
I just don’t believe that Corporations should be able to make money off of my content without compensating me for it, as that is one of the fundamental tenants of Capitalism.
You keep doing you, comrade. /gen /pos
Thanks for your support, its appreciated. o7
