:( I really feel this. I’m so horribly lonely and touch starved, but it’s so scary and uncomfortable to try to “put myself out there” and it feels so awkward and wrong to actively flirt with / pursue someone.

I don’t know how old you are, but I’ve been out of school for a few years and it feels like I’ve missed my opportunity of finding a relationship when I was surrounded by people. Now I can barely leave the house, and even if I did actually meet someone I don’t see how people my age who have been in 5+ relationships would even be interested.

Also I’ve at least been in a “relationship” when I was a kid, and just having a fuzzy memory of what it’s like to cuddle and kiss someone makes it feel worse to be alone. So I don’t think having something in the past always helps.

Anyway I hope you find love some day.