• faythofdragons@slrpnk.net
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    5 hours ago

    So, I’m afab and probably agender, which is where the confusion is coming from. I’m on estrogen and progesterone because otherwise my cycle is stuck to ‘on’, so even my relationship with hormones is complicated.

    Neither of these things directly tell me my subconscious sex, but when the testosterone makes me feel awful, or when being treated and seen as a woman makes me feel wonderful, or when estrogen gives me mild waves of buzzing bodily euphoric, I make inferences about my subconscious sex from that.

    See, none of that resonates with me at all. Going off my meds makes me feel terrible, but that’s from the resulting anemia. I’ve tried living as a man, I’ve tried living as a woman, I’ve never gotten that “yes, this is me” feeling that people talk about. I don’t know what “psychological self conceptualization” as a gender means, because it’s all uncomfortable for me?

    It feels like what you’re talking about is the university course and I’m still in primary education.