No, I know my girlfriend doesn’t look at my stuff but I couldn’t care less if she did. The worst things i have on my devices are pirated games and movies and she can enjoy those all she wants

I think this comes from inside, if you are the type of person that snoops into other people’s stuff you would probably also be afraid others do the same. I couldn’t care less what my girl does on her phone (she would let me if I wanted to though) so I don’t look.

No. But sometimes I wonder if anyone around me can read my thoughts and I become super self-conscious of what I’m thinking.

Yeah, family only saw me as that stupid fucking puzzle piece and not an actual human being so they’d look through everything and assume that stupid puzzle piece was the reason why and share it with ABA therapists, or literal professional child abusers, to make me no longer do the thing. Actual humans can watch youtube poop and meme videos because they’re funny, but I only did because that stupid puzzle piece made me. Actual humans can read and write fanfiction, make games, romhack, and have hobbies, but when I did them, the same stupid ass puzzle piece that made me too stupid and unfit for actual human society made me so talented and so smart, and what used to be a hobby becomes some big stupid “talent” that I’m forced to overwork myself on to prove that puzzle pieces are just as bright as people! So inspirational! Ugh. But when I quit all my hobbies, the same puzzle piece that made me do them made me quit.

This won’t help you on the tech stuff but one technique I use at work is to set “traps”. Very simple things like placing a tiny piece of paper in a place where it will fall if a door is opened. A piece of tape or thread works too. I’ll take a picture for reference

I’m not, but this is one of the reasons I never wanted to move for college, and also part of why I don’t want ever to live at a rented place. I don’t believe “they are out to get me”, I don’t believe I would be targeted, but I do believe that it can happen in the wrong environment, and you never know. I’m also aware that I wouldn’t necessarily notice it, or if I did I wouldn’t know what was compomised.

I don’t normally think about this at home where my family lives, but sometimes I remember that they don’t always lock the door, or that sometimes we have guests.
if I had a housemate I would expect it to be a similar case, except if that was not really a choice. I would still put a simple password on my computer, but I wouldn’t go out of my way to set up disk encryption just for that

Like every time I wake up, I wonder if my parents or brother put some malware/spyware on my phone because they think its a funny prank or whatever.

there’s something unhealthy in that. either that you think about such things, or that there is a reason you do so in your environment

Every time I enter my PIN for my phone, I always cover the screen before entering it in case my parents have cameras in the house. And even more so in public, I’d fear CCTV getting my PIN.

It’s good to be cautious to having cctv see your passwords in public. but at home, again it depends but shouldn’t be a concern.

It already happened to me.

My old phone was on a Verizon family plan, with my family.

Problem: My dad is a QAnon nut who builds ghost guns in his garage.

Mom is a pushover, brain broken from a childhood of drug abuse.

Brother dropped out of high school to do drugs at raves, very emotionally unstable, 3 different times in my life I’ve had to drop everything to save him from becoming homeless and/or dying of an overdose, all occuring either when i was getting two bachelors degress simultaneously at the best uni in the state, or right after I graduated.

I up and left one day after getting sick of their bullshit. Just completely ghosted them after I couldn’t stand their bullshit anymore.

For the next two weeks, my brother keeps somehow showing up every 2 days, despite me being in locations I’ve never, ever been to before.

He is always in his car, slow crawling, looking at his phone, looking around, then panicking when he realizes I am staring at him, driving off.

Hrm. Turn off GPS? Nope, brother keeps showing up.

Call up Verizon explain what is going on, they say oh you’re not an authorized plan admin.

Huh. I was 2 weeks ago.

Root the phone, properly de google it.

My phone plan is then immediately cancelled, within a minute of booting up the phone again.

Call up Verizon (on a shitty grocery store sim card). Oh yeah your phone number was disabled by the admin, you have to contact them to enable it, no you cannot transfer the number to your own new plan, that’s all we can tell you.

… My family de listed me as an admin from the phone plan, enabled parental controls to literally stalk me, then disabled and froze my number/line after i uninstalled their ability to do that.

… This also had the fun side effect of locking me out of every single account that that I was using that number for with 2FA, so, no more banking for me!

If you think I’m nuts: This is just an optional feature in a Verizon family plan.

Works to approximate location even if the target phone doesn’t have the app installed on it.

https://www.verizon.com/support/verizon-family-faqs/

What Verizon Family features are available without downloading the Verizon Family Companion app on my dependent’s device?

Certain features are only available if the Companion app is installed on your dependent’s smartphone and paired with the Verizon Family app on your device.*

Without pairing, you can:
    View Verizon cellular call and text activity†
    Set time restrictions on texts, calls and data usage**
    Set data limits**
    Set text and call limits†
    Get access to the device's network location

    Note: Network location accuracy may vary up to a few miles.

Obviously if you are stationary, and connected to a WiFi network with a known location, like a motel, or a library, or a coffee shop, you can narrow the pure cell tower triangulation error range, by a lot.

So uh yeah, if you have a Verizon family plan, you can easily be under realtime surveillance by whoever is the actual plan master.

I used to have that fear when I was a kid living with family and my mom in particular was very nosey. I understand a nosey parent to make sure you kid isn’t into drugs, but she went way beyond that. She was also paranoid so she was convinced I was doing fucked up shit without any evidence.

It took me a long time to get over that. I did have a friend who was rooting through a couple of my things and we stopped being friends not long after. As far as I know, no one else has gone through my stuff.

The only time I’ve ever gone through anybody else’s stuff is to look through my mom’s drawers for things she stole and my ex’s phone after many years and other evidence that he was fucking around behind my back and I wanted to know for sure that he was. I hated doing it in both cases because I didn’t like it being done to me but felt that was the last option I had.

So yeah, with psycho family, you have every right to feel that way. Just know that isn’t normal and that most people won’t do that.

My spouse and I know each others passwords, and I don’t have anything to hide from them either so no I’m not concerned about that.

I am on my parents family plan, so they could potentially see some of my stuff, but I’m sure they don’t know how and wouldn’t be able to keep up with it even if they did

I know people that do snoop. I had a friend that once asked me if I go through people’s medicine cabinets when I go to their bathroom or through all of their things when I house sit. I gave a solid no because not only do I respect people’s privacy, I don’t even want to know what’s in there. That’s too much knowledge for my limited brain space. She responded that she does every time she has a chance. People be going thru your shit, and it’s the gross ones.

Locking your phone, setting it to auto lock, using biometrics so the pin is hard to steal, etc are all perfectly reasonable things to do. You have a right to privacy

If you have abusive and technically skilled family who have been caught spying on you with technical means, worrying they might do it again would be reasonable

If you constantly worry about something that you have no tangible reason to consider a credible threat, it might be some other issue, from anxiety to OCD. Perhaps try to talk to a professional?

I used to, but I grew up in a house where privacy was a thing that existed in stories, only for other people. Me and my brothers had our rooms regularly searched, and our phone calls eavesdropped on. My parents weren’t secret about it, except when they tried to be, but we knew all the signs and so knew when to keep our mouths shut, and we also got really good at hiding things.

It’s taken decades for me to adjust to the idea that my spouse doesn’t (and won’t) go through my stuff (and yes, this is something I’ve tested him on without his knowledge).

I don’t, and they couldn’t get in if they tried

This reminds me of OCD, tbh. OCD works like this: The Obsession: it’s a persistent thought that you can’t stop thinking about. That you ruminate over and that causes you anxiety. Such as, “someone poisoned my food” or “I left the stove on at home” or “my actions will cause a butterfly effect that will lead to somebody’s death” or “someone could have bled on that sink handle and they had HIV”. Some thought like that, that is sometimes completely illogical. But you cannot argue with how illogical it is, because you feel anxious regardless. Your fear exists separately from what you know is logical.

The there is the Compulsion: you try to alleviate this anxiety/fear by doing an action. Whether it’s praying, or counting, or whatever. If you fear poison, you might only eat in tiny bites. If you fear you left your stove on, you might check it 10 times in a row. If you fear the butterfly effect, you might wait to walk out of your door until it “feels right”. Doesn’t matter what it is. It’s often not logical either. But it makes the anxiety go away.

The the D in OCD is Disorder, because it negatively impacts your life and wastes your time in a significant way. Like, everyone might worry that they left the stove on once in a while, but not everyone is consistently going back to check it 10 times. Or 30 times. Etc.

The reason this sounds like it could possibly be OCD to me is because you have the Obsession that you are being spied on. And you presumably do Compulsions like covering your phone or checking for malware like, all the time. In order to alleviate the anxiety of the Obsession.

So. Not schizophrenia imo. You clearly know it’s not logical of you to be so paranoid. But perhaps OCD. Idk! Only you and a doctor can figure that out.

If I were you I’d ask myself if there are any other things you do that follow this pattern. And that negatively affect your life/mood. People with OCD usually have multiple obsessions and compulsions in response to those obsessions. And these can be observed to change over time too. Think about your childhood. Think about your present.

My SO knows my passwords and I hers. I don’t have anything to hide so I never have to panic if she wants my devices (for ordering food etc).

I can see why this is a contentious topic for either paranoids or people who aren’t being truthful to their partners.

Honestly, I sometimes fear that I live in a more extreme Truman Show, where everyone can read my thoughts and plays along. So yeah, kinda?