- cross-posted to:
- lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
- cross-posted to:
- lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
This is what we’re training LLMs on.
“AI,” what should I do about being constipated?
Painfully stretch your rectum to gaping in order to accommodate your constipation.
That is called impaction removal, and I have done that to people for fun and profit.
As a CNA? Your RNs were lazy. They shouldn’t allow CNAs to do digital disimpaction. In some places even RNs aren’t allowed to do it, only providers.
Edit: looked it up and it gets so dumb that some MDs will consult surgery to do a digital disimpaction in teaching hospitals, lol.
Eh, they were definitely lazy lol.
It wasn’t unusual though. I don’t think I ever saw an RN do one.
One nursing home had us doing foleys, and I’ve started IVs and other stuff that was absolutely not supposed to be done by CNAs.
Nuts. It’s something that really needs an order (standing or otherwise) in their charts nowadays because it’s considered invasive with a risk of vasovagal response which can lead to a code(for those with fragile cardiac status) and many RNs aren’t even trained to do it safely (but let’s be real, if you’re not sticking your hand up there you’re not going to cause a bowel perf). No shortage of lazy RNs in LTC though.
Amen to that. To be kinda fair, most ltc staff develop a sense of “fuck it” and either get lazy or quit entirely. It grinds people down, so the field ends up relying on new hires that are burnt out from other areas, which just completes the cycle
Your rectum stretches anyway. It’s actually kind of like a big stretchy poop bag. You’re thinking anus. -nurse
Be brave and reach in.
good, it beats the incompetent assholes that just tell you not to do things when you ask them how to do them just because they are harmful.
Don’t tell people not to do things. It’s harmful.
I don’t know about anyone else, but I’ve had moments of pure despair as I feel like one’s gonna tear me in half.
A real porcelain shatterer.
After holding in a shit for a couple hours yeah. Literally shitting bricks at that point.
Hours…?
You may want to see a specialist about that, my guy…
Other way around bud, most of us aren’t here shitting our pants just because a bathroom isn’t around.
No; I mean if it becomes that much pressure after that little time, I’m not sure that’s super normal.
Did you not read it is jot pressure just drying out so much it hardens.
Why would I do that? I had to hold it in because there was no toilet around for a couple hours.
Were there any sinks?
No bathrooms or the like.
It’s like a fuckin’ howitzer when it reaches the release point, for real
Me too, once held too long when i was busy and kept hitting the ‘snooze button’ on going all day long, end of the day i dropped something that resembled a hand grenade, with the little square-ish ridges and everything. The pain, the relief, the lasting butthole tenderness afterwards.
A sound like from a gun, followed by the shattering of porcelain.
This lady claims to be an expert but doesn’t even mention the poop knife?!
The poop knife is irrelevant until and unless one plans to flush, which this question did not ask.
Also, why do you assume the nurse is a lady?
“gaping rectum” is distinctly ladylike, no?
Why is every comment after this removed?
I think it turned into some amount of shit slinging that stopped being relevant to the shit at hand. I’m guessing mods decided to close that sphincter before the verbal diarrhea overflowed the rim of the post ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Poop canon confirmed.
I edged to this
Somebody should write a small book about this. You could put it in the bathroom and read it while taking a shit.
For those of us that pooped before smart phones, there was a book series called Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader. I could totally see them have a section dedicated to this.
“The Art of Defecation - How to turn your anatomy into a brown (f)art factory”
It could have an entire chapter just on fiber maxing:
https://i.imgur.com/zmtuVg1.png
Another could be on shit polishing with the mythbusters method.
The Fart of the Deal
Would assuredly be a step up in quality
What the fuck did I just read? Couldn’t stop laughing, but still, wtf
I once held a shit in for a week. Literally 7 days. I was in the hospital and forbidden from using the toilet and using the portable bag toilet in the room with 6 others was not gonna happen so I held it in. Nurses gave me laxatives because they were concerned but I beat them too.
After finally being allowed on the toilet, I basically filled the bowl to the top and clogged the toilet. Yes, it hurt. I now know why and I’m never doing it again.
My friend poops once a week. He claims he told his doctor and they said it’s “on the edge of normal.” It freaks me out though. I’d feel so bloated all the time.
Maybe that no poop challenge guy has tips for next time.
I think the question OP didn’t want to ask was, “does all of this dick in my ass affect my poops?”
the bowel is wider than your asshole
imagining a nurse using the word “asshole” to explain it to a regular person is just hilarious to me.
My mom had to get a colostomy last year after her bowel ruptured, and she spent a month in ICU recovering from sepsis. The nurse there, when she was finally awake, tried explaining everything to her, but she had some pretty severe ICU delirium, and just couldn’t comprehend everything she was saying, especially when she was using medical terms.
Eventually, the nurse said, “girl, basically, you don’t need your bootyhole no more. That’s now just for your husband and lonely weekends”
At which point she fully understood, and I died inside.
I never realized that this process is basically a biological cold extrusion.
That’s because it isn’t. As was just explained, the shape is pretty much set before the “extrusion die” sphincter comes into play.
What are you talking about? The asshole works as a die. Extrusion is about deforming the object, it doesn’t have to change its general “shape”. If there is plastic deformation, which there is as stated(unless you hold it in unhealthily long), then it counts. You extrude a cylinder with a big cross section to one with a smaller cross section.
Damn engineers
TIL my butthole is a PlayDo’h Fun Factory…
Putting the Shit in ShittyLifeProTips.
We have finally found The Forbidden Knowledge
Now that’s one shit experiment to figure something specific out.
There’s nothing about that paragraph I didn’t like!
God bless nurses explaining things in simple term a child can understand.
I mean -1 for no mention of the poo spoon.
Spoon? You mean knife?
No no, that’s toilet stuff. The poo spoon is a classy device to elegantly remove rock hard turds from an anus.
That’s nice, dear.