• Zozano@lemy.lol
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    3 months ago

    I’m not refusing to engage, I simply don’t see things the way you do.

    I don’t think we’re likely to make much progress here I’m either direction.

    • petrol_sniff_king
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      3 months ago

      You are.

      I wasn’t asking you to agree with the definition, I was asking you to follow it through. You know, like a descriptivist.

      If a woman must identify as a woman, then a person who says “I am not a woman” should not be called one. You’re in the category if you want to be, you’re not if you don’t. Simple. Easy. Much utility. This is exactly what people in my camp use it for.

      I’ll point out, by the way, dictionaries provide a lot of useful context, but you cannot expect them to teach you the world. Words there depend on words for meaning. If you don’t know any single word, you can’t parse any of the meaning. If you don’t believe me, read a French dictionary (no translations) and see if you can parse out from the words alone what anything is.

      The only way to parse meaning is to match words you see to experiences you have in life. This is actually how children learn languages. No child knows “the definition,” but they do know how to use the words.

      • LustyArgonian@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        3 months ago

        He’s refusing to engage with me too because he’s a coward. It’s honestly pathetic. He started the fight with misogyny thinking it would be easy and now he’s embarrassed he’s being beaten by women so he’s refusing to try. Such a worm.

        • petrol_sniff_king
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          3 months ago

          Yeah, it’s the anti-intellectualism that really gets me. Reeally bothers me when people refuse to concede even simple, obvious points.

          It’s been funny reading your branches, too.

      • Zozano@lemy.lol
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        edit-2
        3 months ago

        If a woman must identify as a woman, then a person who says “I am not a woman” should not be called one. You’re in the category if you want to be, you’re not if you don’t. Simple. Easy. Much utility. This is exactly what people in my camp use it for.

        I don’t agree with this. What I’ve been trying to tell you.

        I don’t identify as a man, I just do what’s expected of me socially as a man. I fit every conventional definition of man, so I believe that’s a very good descriptor and has utility. It helps that I fit the traditional role of a man too.

        You mention kids learning what words mean through usage. So what is a child’s conception of a woman? It’s going to be based off roles within our society, not how someone feels.

        • petrol_sniff_king
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          3 months ago

          I don’t agree with this.

          Then you will forever misunderstand us.

          You don’t identify as a man? So, if you did things that society expects of women, would you be… a woman… then? Look, the dispassion is admirable, I just wasn’t expecting you to be so loose about it.

          So what is a child’s conception of a woman?

          It’s gonna be faces of people they know along with liberal use of the word “woman” in their presence. I mean, do you understand an orange is like a banana the very first time you see one?

          • Zozano@lemy.lol
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            3 months ago

            If I did things that society expects of women, then I would be a woman. Right.

            I don’t know what your point about the fruit is. Children have a working definition of what a woman is, it’s a helpful description.

            • petrol_sniff_king
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              2
              ·
              3 months ago

              That’s… what you said, though. You’re a man because you do things men do.

              I don’t know what your point about the fruit is.

              Okay. Do you know that oranges and bananas are both “fruit.”

              They’re actually both berries, even.

              • Zozano@lemy.lol
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                1
                ·
                3 months ago

                Yes. I make an effort to present as a man because its convenient. Everyone identifies me as a man then it’s a useful and accurate definition. I don’t see there’s an issue with this.

                I still don’t understand your point about berries.

        • LustyArgonian@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          3 months ago

          It depends who raised that child. There are children currently raised by queer and trans people who have very different ideas of woman versus you. Children also tend to appreciate fairness and know not to name call, so respecting gender is pretty easy for them. They play pretend all the time so someone wanting to be something unexpected is definitely okay with kids.

          That’s fine that you repress your gender to fit the status quo and traditional role of a man. Kinda like gender Stepford Wives. That’s allowed and probably won’t give you brain cancer later.

          Some people like having gender euphoria and happy feelings about their gender, which they can come up with for themselves as their own ideal. We don’t need to make everyone cool suffer because of society’s lack of imagination.

          • Zozano@lemy.lol
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            3 months ago

            I don’t repress my gender, I just don’t care about how I’m perceived beyond its how convenient it is to go with the flow.

            • LustyArgonian@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              3 months ago

              I mean I don’t actually care what you do with your gender. But it doesn’t sound like you experience gender euphoria by your own description of being agender (not identifying as a man) but performing gender as a man. It also sounds like you lack introspection about how the way you see gender, which is subjective and being projected onto others. So those things tend to mean you repress your gender because you don’t even understand that what you’re projecting is an idealized version of who’d you’d be if you were that gender/person.

              • Zozano@lemy.lol
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                1
                ·
                3 months ago

                Okay. I don’t really appreciate the armchair psychology, because you’re not a mind reader.