We don’t know the full story. I’d generally agree with you that family is more important than random strangers, and we should make more effort with family that we would with strangers. But that only goes so far, and the family members need to be making similar efforts, it can’t all be the children’s responsibility to retain good will while the parent routinely damages the relationship.
The OP already said they’d given their mom 6 years, that’s clearly the “family” effect, they have their mother many many more chances than they would a stranger.
I don’t know what your relationship looks like with your parents, hopefully it’s lovely, but once you’re an adult the power dynamic needs to change dramatically. My parents no longer control me and can’t tell me how to live my life. They can provide advice, which I generally cherish because they’re more experienced in life than me, but if they try to strongarm me into their choice like they did when I was their legal charge, I tell them “NO”
I agree, and if it was explained in detail that the family is in the wrong here, I’d probably agree on the separation being the reasonable choice.
But it wasn’t. It was presented in a childish, scornful “in yaaaaah faaaace” way, supported by exaggerated generalization along the lines of “all x who y should go f* themselves”. This is wrong. This is wrong on so many levels, that it’s actually painful to see how one could fall so low and act like it’s ok.
I don’t know what your relationship looks like with your parents, hopefully it’s lovely, but once you’re an adult the power dynamic needs to change dramatically. (…)
I recall Stalin’s Iron Wall. And am a father myself.
We don’t know the full story. I’d generally agree with you that family is more important than random strangers, and we should make more effort with family that we would with strangers. But that only goes so far, and the family members need to be making similar efforts, it can’t all be the children’s responsibility to retain good will while the parent routinely damages the relationship.
The OP already said they’d given their mom 6 years, that’s clearly the “family” effect, they have their mother many many more chances than they would a stranger.
I don’t know what your relationship looks like with your parents, hopefully it’s lovely, but once you’re an adult the power dynamic needs to change dramatically. My parents no longer control me and can’t tell me how to live my life. They can provide advice, which I generally cherish because they’re more experienced in life than me, but if they try to strongarm me into their choice like they did when I was their legal charge, I tell them “NO”
I agree, and if it was explained in detail that the family is in the wrong here, I’d probably agree on the separation being the reasonable choice.
But it wasn’t. It was presented in a childish, scornful “in yaaaaah faaaace” way, supported by exaggerated generalization along the lines of “all x who y should go f* themselves”. This is wrong. This is wrong on so many levels, that it’s actually painful to see how one could fall so low and act like it’s ok.
I recall Stalin’s Iron Wall. And am a father myself.