If you haven’t read Cormac McCarthy, that needs to change. His prose simply has no equal. The man was an actual, honest-to-god, national treasure. He was so formative for me as an author, and I’m just gutted by his death.
Be warned: if you’re going to attempt to read one of his books, you need to make sure that you have the time and space to give it proper attention. His work is heavy, like a slab of lead, and you need to be sure to give yourself extra time to digest things. But it’s so, so rewarding.
Yeah, this one has a lot of existential dread about death and the human condition. It’s BLEAK. So if you’re struggling with depression, strong avoid.
Get better, friend. I’m sorry you’re having a tough time with things. FWIW, I struggle as well with the same thing.