Now, it almost never feels fluid. I spend weeks at a time thinking “Yeah, I feel I’m mostly a man, breaking out of norms just makes me feel free, and I wanna be strong like all those enbies I admire”. And then one month later I see myself equally genuinely thinking “I’m a trans fem~ish, and I wish I could be pretty like all those women I admire.”
And it’s like I don’t emotionally “remember” the other state. Each state is my entire reality while in it.
But consciously, I remember having been through this, not just now with gender, but some years ago with sexuality as well.
So yeah. It’s a little bit of everything, all of the time.
It’s enby, and definitely not solid.
Now, it almost never feels fluid. I spend weeks at a time thinking “Yeah, I feel I’m mostly a man, breaking out of norms just makes me feel free, and I wanna be strong like all those enbies I admire”. And then one month later I see myself equally genuinely thinking “I’m a trans fem~ish, and I wish I could be pretty like all those women I admire.”
And it’s like I don’t emotionally “remember” the other state. Each state is my entire reality while in it.
But consciously, I remember having been through this, not just now with gender, but some years ago with sexuality as well.
So yeah. It’s a little bit of everything, all of the time.