Hi friends ,
I’ve known my best friend since I was 6 years old. He’s always been very, very successful. I’ve always looked up to him, and still do.
A couple of years ago, I confronted him about Elon. I was very concerned. Elon was becoming something I could no longer support. My friend said that he would support Tesla through thick and thin, and here we are today.
He’s made a lot of money off of Elon and I’m happy for him, but I am very concerned that I should not be supporting someone that’s making a living off of someone that possibly is a Nazi. I’m considering ending my friendship. I want to do the right thing. I care about you. I care about us, and I’m very scared for our future.
I’m asking you for advice on whether or not I should give up on my best friend. We’ve been friends for almost 40 years, and I love him dearly. I’m crying right now making these statements. Should I still seek his support?
I am just so angry. My world is becoming so hostile, and I don’t know if I should separate myself from the negative influences around me. What do you guys think?
I’m sorry you’re going through this. Cutting people out of your life hurts even when it’s the right call, and it sucks things have deteriorated to the point of considering it.
I think the gut reaction a lot of people are going to have is to dump him, both because they think it’s the right thing to do and because it’s easy to say that when you’re not cutting an important person out of your own life. And I don’t think that’s a wrong impulse, but before going for the nuclear option, let’s at least take a look at what other options are available to you.
You mention he makes money in some way off Musk. To shift your perspective, what that means is you have access to someone that makes Musk money, who presumably also considers you a friend and values you. What is going to have the highest chance of success of convincing him to stop doing business with Musk?
You’re the one that knows him, nobody here can give a better answer than you. If you think that cutting him off cold turkey is going to be a real wake up call to him, then it might be the right way to go.
But be sure that’s what it is, and not that you don’t want to put in the work of having hard, uncomfortable conversations about it. Staying his friend (or at least in contact with him) but not censoring your opinion about Musk and the fact that it lowers your opinion of your friend might be more persuasive than you being out of his life and not kicking up a fuss. Again, you’re going to know better than anyone here since you know him.
I definitely have these talks with him. I just don’t pass judgement. Honestly, who am I?
But, Elon is now in the White House, and I feel that I am part of the problem now that I am being passive in regards to me friend’s beliefs. I just want some insight and other’s opinions.
As long as you’re having these conversations with him regularly, I wouldn’t say that you’re being passive or morally obligated to cut off your communication with him or anything like that. Consistent outreach has value and it doesn’t mean you’re enabling anything.
But if your conscience is screaming at you that this is a hard line the friendship is never going to recover from, don’t torture yourself trying to fix it either.
Thanks, I appreciate the concern. I’ve had problems with him in the past. But, it was nothing I couldn’t overcome. But now, this is way bigger than me.