As in your never understood by anyone, you don’t fit in anywhere, nobody cares about you, you have no one in your life, no friends, no connections, nothing, all the common advice doesn’t work for you (i.e. distract yourself, take a walk, go to therapy, etc.), you have terrible luck, you can barely find a job, your broken inside, your mind is constantly rotting, you can’t do anything properly, your stuck in a shitty society and or an abusive household, etc. how do you survive? How do you properly bottle everything up without bursting or going insane in a situation like that?
Fake it. Smile and wave when people reveal their politics or weird shit (that we all have) that doesn’t vibe with you. Keep it shallow and surface level, like talk about music and movies and shit. Indulge in conversations about this restaurant or that brand of tea or some shit but never show them who you really are. And they won’t even notice that they don’t really know you and it’s all good being an alien. Maybe everyone does this on some level.
And I’m protecting insanely here in case you couldn’t tell (but that’s because I relate) but instead of saying “go to therapy”, I’m gonna say do yourself a favour and spend some time lurking in some mental health related communities / spaces and see if you relate to any of the things that people say there. And how much of it you relate to. And look up “autistic burnout” too.
As I say (just making double clear), I’m giving you this advice based on my own life so far. So maybe your story is different. But I related a lot to a lot of what you said here.