I was living pretty much entirely anger-free until 2 things happened:

• I started working at my job, where I was hired for my expertise and yet I am frequently interrupted mid-sentence, disrespected, or told to do things in ways that defy the foundations of my entire discipline (before anyone tells me to quit, I can’t, because of immigration-related reasons)
• One of my friends has fallen down the alt-right/X/Musk fanboyism pipeline and just about everything he rants is uninformed, reactionary, and rage-inducing. He spends too much of his time being angry about problems that don’t exist and spreads that anger everywhere

Saying that, I am autistic and often struggle to distinguish between anger, frustration, feeling hurt, and even sadness. I can isolate depression as a feeling fairly reliably though, because that is more numb and less passionate.

Neck tie, if it were a bit bigger.

AFAIK, there is no such thing as being trans that isn’t “in a gender way.” So, as a trans person, I reject the notion that we have that in common. (Unless your gender actually differs from your AGAB.)

That said, I have absolutely no issue with your typing quirk – makes no difference to me at all, and it’s perfectly legible. Can you explain what you mean by dysphoria when you don’t use it?

What does your identity mean to you? Does it revolve around “queering” some sort of default expectation?

(Please note that I am autistic so if you detect a tone of mockery or anything it is completely unintentional and unbeknownst to me; I am asking out of genuine curiosity.)

Yes, this. This particular comment best summarises how I feel about the topic.

Agreeing with your summary of his actions and calling him cringey are not mutually exclusive

A healthy diet is indeed usually enough to meet nutritional needs, but there are valid reasons to take supplements: 1) lack of easy access to healthy food, 2) I personally take supplements because my iron levels are consistently low without them, even with a healthy diet.

Good god, I am so tired of hearing about this cringey edge lord.

You already know this, but I’ll reiterate it in case it helps you get over whatever guilt you might be feeling about it: you can’t. If you have already offered them a non-judgemental space to vent and have expressed that you’re there for them, then you have already done more than any friend should be expected to.

You say “it doesn’t rest in [your] hands alone”; it doesn’t rest in your hands at all! Your desire to save your friend is very admirable but it also sounds like it could be self-sabotaging to some extent.

“Rehab doesn’t work” is a blanket and not entirely true statement. There are a million different pathways to recovery; not every programme works for every person. Maybe try to explain this to them.

Beyond that, the best thing you can do for them right now is to disengage and remain distant. You don’t deserve to have their pains inflicted on you too.

P.S. I am speaking as a recovering addict. One of the things my recovery has taught me is how much of a burden being an addict is to other people. The thought of a relapse hurting my friends disturbs me. Your friend might resent you for turning them away, but when they do start recovery, they will not only understand why; they’ll appreciate it too.

That is how I confirmed that every single one of them was, yeah! It’s also possible to check by just going to reddit.com/user/UsernameHere in an incognito window (or any browser that isn’t logged in). If shadowbanned, the page shows “This account has been suspended.”

Hard agree.

Reddit has been shadow banning every single account I touch; it’s incredible. I burned through 3 accounts in the past month and got fed up, just haven’t bothered since. I seem to be incapable of not getting shadow banned lol, when at least 30% of the activity on that site is bots arguing amongst themselves and reposts of content that did well. I even tried setting a “snoo” (yuck) and a bio on my last account, but it made no difference.

Dude is religiously atheist, fails to see the irony in that, and really needs to get over himself. The best way to be an atheist is by not making your life revolve around something you DON’T believe in.

We live in a cisheteronormative society in which, yes, absolutely, the way someone’s gender is perceived impacts how people interact with them.

I (trans man) generally don’t treat my friends too differently based on gender, but there are definitely some differences between my relationships with women and my relationships with men. When I hang out with other guys, there’s a lot more “dude”, “man”, “bud” in conversations (obviously). When I hang out with women, conversations about feelings and personal issues are more common, and so are hugs/embraces. This is pretty much entirely “code switching” for me, and not a case of me imposing that this is how relationships with a certain gender should work.

I should point out, though, that this is not 100% based on gender and gender only. It’s largely about the personality, and we live in a world in which there is a strong correlation between gender identity and personality traits (see: gender roles and stereotypes), and so gender can often (but not always) act as a shorthand for that. As a counterexample, someone I know is an effeminate (cis) guy, and I’d say that our conversations and interactions feel more like the ones I’m used to with women.

Your question’s made me curious; you appear to be binary trans (please correct me if I am mistaken!) Prior to making this post and having this discussion, what had the concept of passing meant to you? Was it purely about automatically being referred to with the right pronouns and terms (son/brother/etc) without having to say anything? Or was there anything more to it?

FWIW I am trans and I 100% agree with you. Been thinking about making an account on another instance, just not sure which yet.

Not OP, but there are at least 2 things going on here:

The first part is that the Jewish person is effectively treating this like an inside joke, where someone might not find it funny unless they were present in the situation that the joke references.

The second part to the ‘God not being there’ bit (which is what actually makes it funny imho) is basically saying that the holocaust was so horrible that God was clearly someplace else/asleep/absent to allow something like that to happen under his watch.

Accidentally?

That is really sad – the worst of both worlds. You guys deserves better.

That’s totally fair. I’ll leave my comment up just bc it’s informative

I think it’s a little more than 5, but yeah, there are only a handful, maybe 10 or so. This is otherwise 100% true.

The moment I or any FTM friend of mine mention top surgery, the discussion immediately changes into which surgeon and why.

And the gossip travels far! I haven’t had surgery yet, but I have my surgeon picked out already, and so many trans guys without any firsthand experience feel the need to tell me that he is an asshole. (I do appreciate the heads up; it’s just that I kind of don’t care bc his results are awesome.)

I support this post, but FWIW some people (myself included) may find the language used dysphoria-inducing. Any other flavour of criticism is probably just transphobia.

Eh… I know this is a meme sub, but this undermines any arguments to be made about real problems with healthcare systems by just… not being accurate.

If you need stitches in the UK, that’s an A&E (ER for my North American friends) sort of ordeal, and yeah, you won’t be seen immediately because the system is badly managed and overwhelmed. You’ll have to wait several hours (unless you’re bleeding out/at risk of death, in which case you’ll be seen quickly), not 43 months ffs.

That said, anything that’s non-urgent can take a few months. The only exceptions to this are 1) mental health, where you’re looking at several months for the waitlist almost irrespective of severity, and 2) gender-affirming care, where you won’t be seen for well in excess of 5 years, which at this rate & in this political climate (TERF island), is likely to outlast the NHS gender clinics themselves. Private is still an option for both of these branches of healthcare, but it’s expensive for sure.