I’m in my early thirties and adamantly childfree. I’m lucky enough to be in a long-term relationship with someone who brought up her desire to be childfree on more or less our first date. But I am not having too much luck with my friends from childhood and university - they all seem to be wanting kids, and learning of their pregnancies leaves me with a feeling of sadness. I don’t hate kids and think no one should have them, and I am happy for them if they truly wanted this, but I also know what them having kids will mean - we are essentially putting our friendship on hiatus, and I still don’t know whether waiting 10 years for the kids to be a bit more independent and not requiring as much attention will mean I suddenly have friends again, but somehow I very much doubt it. And I also don’t want 10 years without other friends than my girlfriend. She is in very much the same situation, and while we are good at making the best out of not having kids and stressing about having them, we both would want to be able to hang out with good friends once in a while, both common between us, but also some that are exclusive to each of us.
My assumption is that this is quite common - so I am hoping someone would like to share some success stories in turning this situation around. :)
It’s highly subjective. For me, what you describe is the stuff of nightmares.
Right, nothing I said should be taken as gospel. In my opinion it’s just what naturally happens with good friends. There’s no way around it. The kids end up getting to know you. I have zero clue as to what you’re so offended about. I honestly doubt you have any friends anyway and are just arguing to be arguing.
People like you, actually.
So childfree people should mark in their calendars the crotch goblins’ birthdays and buy presents for them? Become “uncles”? That kind of commitment to children is what we’re avoiding, for crying out loud.
And, despite your ill will, my friends are many, and most of them are childfree or have grown children, and our shared activities are, excluding very rare occasions, devoid of infants.