I’ve been considering it more and more. There’s a gym nearish with a pool, and I’m a very strong swimmer, and it’s one of the few exercises that isn’t physically painful because of my bad back and feet. But for real, I know no one is actually making fun of me or other heavy people in that environment. It’s more my own brain narrating the worst possible opinions and applying them to everyone I meet. Which, funnily enough, is me doing to everyone else what I fear they are doing to me: being unkind.
Oh man! Water exercise is so sweet when you’ve got a bad back and/or joints. Being able to get a decent workout without being laid up for two days is a beautiful thing for me :)
But, I feel you. I’ve got that same inner critic sniping away. As I’ve gotten older, it’s less about physical things and a lot more about mistakes made, things that were hurtful that I didn’t have the ability to see as hurtful when I said or did them.
But along that, I did figure out that the old truism about having to give yourself something first, before you can really give it to or get it from others holds up. If I’m not kind to myself, if I can’t forgive myself, and love myself (at least a little), it’s nigh impossible to genuinely give those things to someone else.
I don’t know if that actually applies to everyone or not; maybe other people can give truly of themselves without accepting good things from themselves first, but it seems to be the case.
I’ve been considering it more and more. There’s a gym nearish with a pool, and I’m a very strong swimmer, and it’s one of the few exercises that isn’t physically painful because of my bad back and feet. But for real, I know no one is actually making fun of me or other heavy people in that environment. It’s more my own brain narrating the worst possible opinions and applying them to everyone I meet. Which, funnily enough, is me doing to everyone else what I fear they are doing to me: being unkind.
Oh man! Water exercise is so sweet when you’ve got a bad back and/or joints. Being able to get a decent workout without being laid up for two days is a beautiful thing for me :)
But, I feel you. I’ve got that same inner critic sniping away. As I’ve gotten older, it’s less about physical things and a lot more about mistakes made, things that were hurtful that I didn’t have the ability to see as hurtful when I said or did them.
But along that, I did figure out that the old truism about having to give yourself something first, before you can really give it to or get it from others holds up. If I’m not kind to myself, if I can’t forgive myself, and love myself (at least a little), it’s nigh impossible to genuinely give those things to someone else.
I don’t know if that actually applies to everyone or not; maybe other people can give truly of themselves without accepting good things from themselves first, but it seems to be the case.
I’ve been meaning to swim more too. You should do it, so should I.