Hello, I(31M) guess I will begin from the start of this relationship. I became friends with Kay(24F) who is a is an ENM relationship with Jon(24M). Kay and I really hit it off and began being intimate. Fast forward to a couple weeks ago. While Kay and I were chilling Jon came home and was so upset he could barely contain himself. Kay’s demeanor changed as well. I just ignored it. The next time I was going to chill with Kay, she couldn’t because Jon needed to “apparently process something”. A week later I met up with Kay and she said she was overwhelmed and couldn’t hang out as often. I just took it at face value. I haven’t seen her since. She continues to text me, and insists she wants to see me. I am definitely confused, but should I be worried?
I cannot answer those questions. I can speculate. I feel they are new to ENM relationships and may have entered into it as a way to find new partners. Not much prep work or ground rules. Idk. It is kinda looking like Jon is that kind of person. I am so thankful for your advice! I will have to prepare a message to Kay. Any advice on how to communicate my concerns?
I have this: Hey Kay! So, I have a few questions that have been in my head for a bit. I have decided to ask you. When we last chilled, why was Jon so upset? Your demeanor changed as well when they got home. And the next time we were going to chill and you had to “process” something. Was that about us? Is Jon jealous? When y’all decided to become an ENM relationship, what was your true intention? I ask these questions because if I am the cause of any issues, we need to discuss them and figure out what’s going to happen. I care for you. I want you to be happy, content, and safe. I don’t want you to do anything you do not want to. And I want you to be free to do what you want.