I understand that I have to relax every now and then, however I am really struggling with it, being constantly in an endless loop of:
- Having a lot of energy and doing a bunch of stuff for a couple of weeks.
- Getting exhausted to the point I cannot control my impulsions and wreck my daily routine
- Try to rest only to fall in a depressive state for a couple of weeks.
- Collect myself up and repeat from step 1.
Trying to do low effort activities like watching a series or playing video games, is addictive, I stay up late without being able to stop, and end up more tired.
The hobbies I like require focus, and that’s what I am trying to avoid. Examples include programming and chess.
Going out with friends is nice but drains my social energy, after a couple of weekends out I need to stay in.
Chores sometimes work, but other times I feel guilty about the state of cleanliness of my home.
So, how do you relax/rest? Got a magic recipe? Are you struggling like me?
Edit: I just want to say this community is awesome, thanks for the support.
Meditation in the middle of the day, music in the morning, reading before bed
Like you already noticed, the things you do for fun are not relaxing. Fun is important, too, but relaxation also needs to be part of your routine. You can’t wait until you’re stressed or tired.
I cannot focus long enough for meditation, do you have an app that works for you? Any insights for someone trying to get into meditation while having ADHD?
I occasionally start reading a book, but either I get too into it and stay sleepless until it’s finished, or I get bored, drop it and then feel guilty for not reading. Overall, it kinda works for me but it’s not sustainable for me.
The point of meditation is to stop focusing. Every time something catches your attention, ignore it. For people like us, or at least for me, this is easier in the beginning with eyes open, facing s blank wall. Any time something grabs your attention, redirect to staring at a spot on the wall. It’s a skill you learn, and it’s easier with someone standing over you watching and reminding when they see you start to look around or fidget.
Another form of meditation is by chanting a mantra; something in another language and short, ideally. In this one, you’re focused on your breathing and the mantra, saying it slowly and banishing all other thoughts besides the sound of your voice (or inner voice) and your slow, even breathing.
A third one some ND people like us coloring. Some crayons or colored pencils and a coloring book that’s more pattern than picture. Again, try not to think about anything beyond the color on the page.
With all forms of meditation, think of it like a bank, into which you’re depositing not money but calmness. So it only works if you make the deposits in advance. But once you do, if you find yourself in a situation where you’d like to be calm, reaching for the mantra, or staring at a spot on the wall, it absorbing yourself in image less color, will bring you some of the calm you banked earlier.
With the book, let yourself be bored and drop it. Follow that boredom into sleep. You don’t need to read; the reading is a tool to help you relax.
I like to do yoga and try to meditate while I stretch. I also can’t focus just sitting there, so having moving poses tends to help a lot