Honestly, based genie. Instead of fucking you over by twisting your wish into something negative, he fucks you over by spending time on small details. At least the latter will likely result in something you actually want, whereas the former will probably suck.
Probably an autistic genie. It’s important to get the details right!
These aren’t small details, they are crucial details.
What’s the opposite of a monkey’s paw?
birds tail
He’s a smart one. Upselling body-shrinking or reduced bone density and increased metabolism.
That’s 3 wishes.
The original terms of the wish requested the ability to fly, not just wings. These are part and parcel to being able to fly with wings. Ergo, only one wish.
Well now, mortal. I understand your point but rules are rules.
He could have claimed so, but he’s not a jackass genie.
Not picking telepathic will is the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen.
given this genie’s thoroughness your brain would have to be 100x as heavy
I wish it didn’t have to be
Different folks, different strokes.
Welcome to 2025. Now that you’ve exited the rock and had a mild warm up, let’s get you up to speed
Fair point.
other peoples thoughts and goals bleed into your own without filter
That’s my kind of genie. I wonder if he’d be cool discussing the pros and cons of some of those choices.
Guys I got it.
I want a Green Lantern ring.
ring flys away looking for a worthy holder
You should ask for the OG green lantern ring, just magic
Wings? Nah, if I can’t fly like Goku I don’t want to fly at all.
dunno. inflating like a pufferfish and becoming a dirigible is cool too. i could go for that.
Thank you for that visual. I never realized the world needed Zeppelin Man.
As long as you don’t become Hindenburg Man
So like, did you know if you jar farts you can still make blue darts with em
The genie grants your wish. You inflate via your own flatus. When you land, you have to release a fart big enough to buoyantly lift an entire human body.
Aww he gets me
I’m sure you mean grown up DBZ Goku, but I would 100% take a flying nimbus and putter around the skies on my little cloud buddy. Just remember to pack a parachute!
Fine. You get superhero-style flight. But just to be a dick, the genie makes it so you can only fly feet first.
As an engineer of sorts, this is every conversation that I have with clients, but comic lady answers waaaaaaaaaay better than most people lol.
Genie: What kind of bird?
Clients: I saw a very pretty bird once, I think it was in Europe. It had feathers and part of it was black.
Genie:… Right.
The laws of physics are a bitch.
To steal an idea I had on something similar once, perhaps on an entirely different site, there’s also where the wings come from in the first place, literally and figuratively.
The equivalent structure to a bird’s wing in humans is the arm and hand. Does this new wing take the place of the forelimb as it does in birds or does the wisher necessarily become a six-limbed creature?
Yeah, you’d have to go for an insect design to have separate appendages and wings (which the genie did try to offer).
Like writing with AI
Except after the second question it makes generic assumptions and responds immediately from data it’s hallucinated rather than backed up with facts, despite telling it to do so or having had explicitly shared with it the full context beforehand.
This is why we can’t have nice things
Telpthic?
Telpthic.
I would have just gone with the obvious answer: telepathic will
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