I recently rewatched the video of the woman on the plane screaming that the passenger beside her wasn’t human and it got me thinking about something I’ve seen.
I remember seeing a teenage girl in a small food store I go to address the guy behind the counter as ‘human’. “Thanks, human.” Stuff like that. I think she was just doing a bit or something but I thought it was strange.
Yes.
I was the director of a very small summer camp in a former career. For some background info, the camp mainly served kids from some rather infamous inner-city neighborhoods. This was one of the very few black owned summer camps in the country. 99% of these kids were black or brown; I am vampiricly pale white and ginger.
And so, I found myself at a conference representing this camp…. Mostly to beg, coerce, and shame wealthy people there into giving us money (we sure as shit weren’t making money off the families of our kids; most couldn’t pay, but going to camp was safer than any week at home in the city).
On day 2 of the conference I get a text. It’s from the secretary of some high powered individual from Focus on the Family whose name I have long forgotten. He wants to have lunch with me to discuss an “opportunity.”
What the hell, right? Their money’s just as green as everyone else’s. Maybe I can charm the guy into cutting us a check.
So, I say yes and we meet at the fanciest restaurant in the hotel this conference was in.
Friends, I’m not one to believe in possession but something was straight up evil about this man from the moment I sat down. I mean I felt like I was eating with a fucking demon.
The “opportunity,” by the way, was to essentially fuck over the community our camp was for and convince our board to sell the land to his organization. This land was the same space some of the families of our community had been enslaved on. It was hallowed ground.
I ordered the most expensive dish I could find, waited for the food to come, told him to go fuck himself, and then went back to my hotel room and took a shower to get the feeling of being around that…… Thing off me.
I really don’t know how to describe it. It was like sitting across from some kind of hungry emptiness in the form of an old man.
I don’t know what I talked to, but I do wonder if that mother fucker was human.
No, I’ve never met a CEO
Look up Kenneth Copeland. The pastor dude.
Copeland is something scary wearing an Edgar Suit.
Demon in skin form
I don’t know how he got a following at all. Like, a lot of televangelists have a style. If you watch them as a kind of theater, it’s kinda fascinating. Not something I’d recommend on the regular, but you can see how they draw people in. Stage magicians can take notes from these guys.
Kenneth Copeland, though? How does he not creep you the fuck out at first glance? Just watch him doing this blood ritual thing. Copeland would make a terrible stage magician.
I have a public-facing job, so, yes.
As a member of the public, I’m so sorry
Note that a lot of people who come across like that are probably somewhere on the autism spectrum. Lt Cmdr Data is seen as autistic representation for a reason. Like Data, they aren’t bad people at all, they just function differently.
Yea. Mark Zuckerburg. Just watch this reptile drink a glass of water. Its a alien reptile that has his UFO break down, and he’s stuck on Earth. This reptile loves violating people’s privacy so that’s why this reptile invented facebook.
/s I don’t actually believe he’s an extraterrestrial, but like, with this crazy timeline, I won’t be surprised to see Independence Day Aliens
Got this question at bar trivia:
“How many pairs of ribs do human beings have?”
Me: “Easy! 12!”
Everyone else: “How do you know that?”
Me: “Because I have 13 pairs of ribs…”
Same haha. There’s dozens of us, dozens!
There’s 13 of you
Bakers dozen
I did, two times. First was when woman had some problems with spine and skin so she looked weird and moved weird add to it my shortsightedness and it was weird/creepy. Second time I was going back home at 3 am after drinking, and there was a guy that was walking in my direction in the unevenly lit underpass and he had no face. I was like don’t scream like a little girl it’s alcohol probably. Then I understood it was a guy who learned to wear helmet on a moto the hard way of being human chalk piece.
Haha, yes those creatures are so strange, isn’t that right fellow humans? Who do they think they’re fooling? Get a copy of A Changeling’s Guide to Being Human and blend in better, aw jeez.
Licks eyes nervously
The NPC type people. It’s like they don’t exactly have a conscious that can be spoken with.
Some of you reading this might think I’m referring to individuals I think are dumb but it’s not that. I don’t know if it makes sense there’s a type of person that thinks they’re above others. And that it is them who are interacting with everyone else who are NPCs.
Like, dude. Snap out of it and talk to people like a normal human being.
Not exactly what you mean but I actually tell myself all the time that I wish I was a real human because the things I struggle with make me feel isolated.
You are a real human. I’m sorry you feel like that, I hope things get easier for you.
I appreciate the sentiment.
I’m often told I lack human traits in my face to face communication with others
have you considered that you might be on the autism spectrum? 50% basing that off your description 50% basing that off your username. Normies hardly read xkcd
I’d bet like 90% of Lemmy knows what XKCD is
So you’re supporting his claim.
Gotta be like 99%
Wow the only way I’d be part of the 1% then. No clue on what that is
An often cited webcomic.
For example this especially relevant one
the terminally online know without clicking that the link is to the ‘today’s 10,000’ comic just from the context!
Oh. I’m absolutely on the spectrum. It’s such a part of my life I didn’t even think to bring it up.
Haven’t met him but Zuckerberg
A friend did run into him in Hawaii and called him steve Zuckerberg just to fuck w him
I don’t know why but I love that omg
Gotta take em down a peg
lol. the only sentient beings on the planet are us humans. Stop wasting your time trying to out things that obviously do not exist and enjoy earth sports and earth entertainment and earth foods. Do not be the silly who worries about how light reflects off the surfaces of his neighbors plant matter and if its wavelength is more pure than what his does.
Or, another thought, maybe I’m just curious and want to have something interesting to read. Or, maybe I am the silly who worries about how light reflects. Or, maybe I’m the non-human wanting to interact with humans. It’s all a possibility.
no no. just us earthlings here. aliens are not hiding among the populace. don’t be a silly milly.
Ah, I didn’t say aliens! You did. Now, I think there aliens among us.
no no no. all us humans are human. stop making waves.
That’s just what an alien would say
no no. you are just as human as I. I do not hold your words against you. Let us not worry about aliens because there is much hilarity and action on our primitive network technology.
Ok, sure. Now I’m worried about synthetic humans or mimics posing as humans. Maybe I’ll peruse our global network to find a video of music to distract myself. Or maybe a video of a human owned pet.
Funny you should mention it, I just added this to my to-read list
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/127282939-beautyland?from_choice=true
Your joke didn’t land
what joke fellow earther?