‘I love my child. But if I could go back in time and get an abortion, I would 100 per cent of the time,’ says Melinda. Kelly Rissman reports on a story that exposes the hurdles women faced before the Supreme Court’s Dobbs decision in June 2022
Not hated exactly, but there will be knowledge that they weren’t wanted. They will blame themselves as kids tend to do. Trauma ensues. What a fucking unnecessary tragedy.
Nah hated is entirely possible. Depends entirely on the mother and if she has the emotional and rational capacity to separate it. If her brain makes her think of her rapist every time she looks at her child, it will be impossible to love it.
I hope she can love it but i wouldnt blame her if she cant.
I’m contemplating about whether parents even should tell them or not? On one hand, the kid kind of has the right to know, on the other hand they’d likely hate themselves for it. Personally I think it’s better to end pregnancies that come from rape for those reasons. Even if the parents attempt to look past it, subconsciously they will always be reminded of the rapist when they see the kid and they will act accordingly, whether they want to or not.
Kid is gonna read that article. Maybe now, maybe one day. Imagine reading an article about how your mom wishes desperately with all her heart that she didn’t have you.
She loves you despite what you are, not because of it. Fuck me.
Yeah I want to admit up top that I have no fucking idea what the right approach is here.
I’m a new parent, but thankfully my kids aren’t old enough for me to encounter complicated questions yet.
This might change, but right now my plan is to do my best to avoid cover stories for things. If you’re open (as much as is appropriate) and honest (in the context of the delicate situation), that might be better than trying to hide this aspect of the kids ancestry.
As an adult I know that it’s possible to simultaneously live a child while acknowledging that an abortion would have been a better option.
I honestly don’t know whether a child can understand that.
The thing is, it’s not just a conversation with a child. It’s lived experience. I’m absolutely confident that my children (we have twins) will know that I love them because of my actions - the time I spend with them every day.
I’m thankful I don’t have to navigate this. I would talk to a child psychologist or something to figure out the best way forward. I suspect that will always be communication, but an expert could help you know the best timing, things to watch out for, et cetera.
She could have given him up for adoption, and had even set the stage for it, then decided against it. She had options, but made the decisions that she made. It isn’t healthy to channel regret about what could have been into your kid or into political movements that hadn’t even happened at the time when she made those decisions.
She had adoptive parents lined up for him before he was even born, but then decided to keep him. Seems like he would have been better off with parents who wanted him instead of a biological mom who would secretly resent him for everything she thought she should have achieved in life. Did you read the article or just get stuck on the click bait headline?
What a joyful life for that kid. It’s not his fault, but he’ll be hated by his mom his entire life for it.
Edit: I am pro choice and fucking hate what our country is being turned into by the right.
Not hated exactly, but there will be knowledge that they weren’t wanted. They will blame themselves as kids tend to do. Trauma ensues. What a fucking unnecessary tragedy.
Nah hated is entirely possible. Depends entirely on the mother and if she has the emotional and rational capacity to separate it. If her brain makes her think of her rapist every time she looks at her child, it will be impossible to love it.
I hope she can love it but i wouldnt blame her if she cant.
I’m contemplating about whether parents even should tell them or not? On one hand, the kid kind of has the right to know, on the other hand they’d likely hate themselves for it. Personally I think it’s better to end pregnancies that come from rape for those reasons. Even if the parents attempt to look past it, subconsciously they will always be reminded of the rapist when they see the kid and they will act accordingly, whether they want to or not.
Kid is gonna read that article. Maybe now, maybe one day. Imagine reading an article about how your mom wishes desperately with all her heart that she didn’t have you.
She loves you despite what you are, not because of it. Fuck me.
Yeah I want to admit up top that I have no fucking idea what the right approach is here.
I’m a new parent, but thankfully my kids aren’t old enough for me to encounter complicated questions yet.
This might change, but right now my plan is to do my best to avoid cover stories for things. If you’re open (as much as is appropriate) and honest (in the context of the delicate situation), that might be better than trying to hide this aspect of the kids ancestry.
As an adult I know that it’s possible to simultaneously live a child while acknowledging that an abortion would have been a better option.
I honestly don’t know whether a child can understand that.
The thing is, it’s not just a conversation with a child. It’s lived experience. I’m absolutely confident that my children (we have twins) will know that I love them because of my actions - the time I spend with them every day.
I’m thankful I don’t have to navigate this. I would talk to a child psychologist or something to figure out the best way forward. I suspect that will always be communication, but an expert could help you know the best timing, things to watch out for, et cetera.
He’ll probably starve to death too at the rate we’re going.
She could have given him up for adoption, and had even set the stage for it, then decided against it. She had options, but made the decisions that she made. It isn’t healthy to channel regret about what could have been into your kid or into political movements that hadn’t even happened at the time when she made those decisions.
Yeah wow fuck the kid over even more clap clap clap
She had adoptive parents lined up for him before he was even born, but then decided to keep him. Seems like he would have been better off with parents who wanted him instead of a biological mom who would secretly resent him for everything she thought she should have achieved in life. Did you read the article or just get stuck on the click bait headline?
Adoption is guaranteeing the kid feels abandoned by their birth mother and having feelings of being unwanted.
That’s an absolutely trash take about adopted kids. Get out of here
Same energy. If one doesn’t make sense neither make sense.