Go to a mall with a friend, park in every single parking spot. If you don’t have a mall near then use the closest thing that has a lot of parking spaces and some low speed traffic.

You can adjust the level of difficulty based on the day of the week and time of day you’re there.

The idea is to get comfortable in a low risk and low stress environment. That way if/when you’re overwhelmed you can stop and try again.

Once you’re comfortable doing that driving on real streets is much less overwhelming and easier.

That’s how I did it and I found it to be extremely helpful. Hope that helps and try to have fun.

In my state, I had to take a written exam (mostly about the rules of the road; very easy if you study the driver’s manual for your state) first. Then, I had to spend at least six hours working with a professional driving instructor. Then, I practiced with my dad every once in a while until the road test, which I failed miserably because I was tired to the point of delirium, then I took it again a couple months later and passed with flying colors. After that, there was a probationary period for a year or two during which there were limits on the hours I was allowed to drive and how many passengers I could have. And that was it.

Basically, you need to legally start the process yourself through your local Department of Motor Vehicles (or the local equivalent) by indicating somehow that you want a license. To actually learn how to drive, get a fully licensed, trusted adult to ride along with you in your car and tell you about how to drive, while you…well, drive, preferably in an empty parking lot.

You also need to learn how to pass the road test; it is a completely separate skill from actually driving. Get a list of the things you’ll be tested on (check your government’s website) and replicate the testing setup on your own. For example, my dad actually sourced some cones for me to practice the parallel parking section of the test.

Really, you just gotta get in that car and drive. Drive in areas without cars until the nervousness goes away. The responsibility shouldn’t be underestimated, but at the same time… it’s not rocket science. Talking to the driving instructor was a lot scarier than driving ever was.

Make sure your car is actually allowed to be used in the road test. In my state, the car had to have either a second break pedal or a handbrake. If your car doesn’t meet your state’s criteria, you could probably borrow a driving instructor’s car (for a few), but the best way to do it is to borrow a friend’s or relative’s car that you can actually bring to the test.

One thing to know about cars is that you get a lot more acceleration and turning than you actually need for the most part. Except in rare circumstances [1], you only need to make small movements with the accelerator. The brake pedal is quite strong when new, but will lose its strength over time.

Also, driving on the freeway [2] is different to driving on a typical road. IMO it is terrifying the first couple of times, but it’s a lot easier after exposure. The thing about freeways is that you are in continuous motion (assuming no traffic jams or accidents). You need to approximately match the average speed of the rest of traffic. Because you’re all moving at nearly the same speed and direction, the challenge with freeway driving reduces to a problem of not tapping other cars. The problem is mostly solved by slow, deliberate, signalled movements relative to other cars. Keep in mind that you still have to watch for stuff that isn’t moving with traffic, like animals or debris that fell off a vehicle.

Your vehicle has a blind spot by the back passenger doors. You’ll have to check those areas by physically rotating your head.

Lastly, we need to talk about cars in general. Despite the fact that I actually kind of like to drive, I cannot just forget the negative environmental impact that cars (including mine) have on our world. Additionally, car-centric infrastructure in the US establishes an enormous cost of entry to public life in a society which already makes life difficult for the poor at every other possible level. Even with the amazing breakthroughs in safety we’ve made with cars, they are still one of the more dangerous methods of transport per capita. Put simply: cars are bad for humans and good for the people who sell them. If you can get by without driving a car, then not only is that fine, it is better than driving one at all. However, at least in countries that have backed the automobile over public transit, having a car predictably gives you an advantage over those who don’t.

[1] There’s an old state highway in my area with a few exits where you come off a residential street from a dead stop directly into a 50 mph zone, with absolutely zero on-ramp. You have to literally floor it, or you’ll probably get hit from behind. It’s super dangerous, but also super fun. This is unusual; you usually get a good amount of space to accelerate and match the speed of traffic before you merge onto a highway. Ask your driver friends about dangerous/stupidly designed intersections, and I’m sure they’ll have lots of stories. Memorize them, because someday it’ll be you taking those intersections.

[2] IMO driving on local highways (ones with traffic lights) is a lot closer to just an ordinary road.

I ended up playing a video game (BeamNG.drive) for a while, which has a realistic car driving experience as one of its selling points. I decided to try and drive there, because crashing wouldn’t matter; after a while I couls drive for hours with as many other AI cars on the road as my bad computer could muster without crashing. The experiences then helped me learn how to drive a real car, because by then I had a feel for how cars drove. Would reccomend if you have an okay computer for gaming, a couple dollars to spare, and a lot of time.

Cars & I don’t get along…at all. I started learning to drive when I was 15, couldn’t get my license until I was almost 20 because of repeated test failures.

Every single car I’ve owned died from either a major accident (most likely due to sensory overwhelm), or mechanical neglect. The last time I stepped behind the wheel of a car was at least 8 years ago. I’ve been using mostly public transit & occasionally Lyft/Uber.

I don’t regret my decision to give-up driving, the amount of anxiety & what-not has dropped tremendously. You could liquidate & offer me all of Elon Musk’s & Jeff Bezos’ assets, and it would not be enough to get me to drive again.

On my first test, I got badly overwhelmed and failed.
Then covid hit and my theory expired.

I recently had my second test and passed after a tonne of practice. It felt very tense and I felt like I had already failed throughout most of it, but the examiner said that I only had a minor fault in the parking manoeuvre. Yay!

My grandfather paid for lessons, I didn’t learn until like, February of this year and I’m 22. Once I was behind the wheel it felt much more… natural(?). I’m terrified of driving, I absolutely hate being behind the wheel but since I’m starting college in a few weeks I kinda need to be able to drive the car to and fro.

It takes time, I suggest just driving around neighborhoods to begin with, doesn’t have to be long drives. Even just swapping with the current driver to take the last mile or two home works; that’s how I started. Plus, once you have your driver’s license you don’t have to renew it every six months!

I feel like lessons might be an option, I’m currently 21 getting taught by my mom.

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I had lessons from various people every summer for the first few years after I turned 17 (age you can start learning on public roads in the UK). I’d get to “test standard” each time on the mechanics of it, but navigating other drivers was too much so I never actually took a test, and never intend to.

I’m now in my 30s and have structured my life around not having a car. My house is on a 24-hour bus route into town where I work, and walking distance to most amenities. My husband does have a car, so he can drive us places that aren’t on public transit routes (such as our parents’ houses) but the vast majority of the time I’m doing my own thing while he’s at his job an hour’s drive away.

Oh god. Driving was the bane of my existence for YEARS. Any attempt to learn was met with panic attacks, hyperventilating and tunnel vison. What I did was develop a desensitization program for myself, based on desensitization programs for animals. Specifically dogs and horses.

First I would sit behind the wheel. Not turn the key, just sit there. Once that wasn’t scary I would turn the car on. Then the next step was putting the car into diffrent gears. Finally I was able to pull forwards and backwards. I continued working through each step until I was finally able to drive around the block. The key was making sure that each step was throughly completed, as in I felt no fear doing the action.

If I freaked out I would go back to the previous step and do it again. This took over a month. I practiced parrell parking so many times I could practically do it with my eyes closed. Finally I was able to take my drivers test and I passed it first try!

My Dad taught me when I was a kid. We used to go to empty mall parking lots and practice various maneuvers. Once I was old enough for a license I took a driving course to get public road/highway experience, but by that point I was comfortable behind the wheel.

That said, I despise driving. I can’t wait for self-driving cars to be the norm.